Renesmee:My Life and Yours
by Cullen24Bryant
Summary: Renesmee has to deal with just finding out she has been imprinted by her best friend Jacob plus deal with MANY obstacles...please give it a chance! it wont disappoint!PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK! I didnt know I had this set up so people couldnt leave comments!
1. Chapter 1

It's not like I asked to be born and it would be lying to say I wasn't a mistake. Because I obviously was, I can't ignore the fact that I had killed my mother Bella and tortured my father Edward by my very existence. I often wonder how it would have been if my mother would have remained human, what life would be like had I not killed her.

Bella hates when I say things that "suggest" I'd killed her and I always reply with "mom look at the facts, I did kill you" and Edward usually just mumbles something and walks away annoyed by my constant guilt.

I am happy and I love my family, I just can't digest the fact that I had changed the entire dynamic of my family the humans and the vampires even the werewolves which I consider to be my family as well. I think all I really want is for my family to acknowledge the fact that I am not some miracle child or some sort of blessing from the Gods, but rather some sort of omen or freak of nature, ok maybe not an omen but freak of nature yes.

My combativeness about my existence has always been a thorn in my best friend Jacobs's side. Every time I bring up the fact that I wasn't meant to be here, he always replies with _Nessie you have no idea how special you are, how important you're life is to all of us._ I would argue that statement with that fact that I didn't see why I was here what purpose did I serve and he'd reply with _Trust me Ness, you serve a major purpose, you don't see it now but just please trust me._

And I do trust Jacob, with every fiber of my body, but I know he hasn't got a clue what my purpose is.

Sometimes I feel guilty or ungrateful, I have family and friends who love and cherish the ground I walk on but I can't let go of the fact that I somehow don't deserve the attention. Bella blames my self loathing on my father, saying that other than him I am the most self depreciating person she'd ever known.

"And yet I sit here talking to you" Bella nearly snapped.

"You know what I mean Mom! Don't you ever wonder? Doesn't it ever cross your mind?" I said pulling out the chair in our kitchen to sit beside her.

"No, Renesmee I don't! This is what I wanted. Your father and you, why is that so hard for you to understand? I might be dead _technically_ but I am much more alive now than I was when I was human and that is in most part because of you"

"It's crazy" I mumbled under my breath, which was pointless, with her vampire senses she heard me just as if I yelled it from the roof top.

"Renesmee is it crazy to follow your heart? Whether you believe me or not I'd made the decision to become a vampire well before you were born, well before we thought it was possible you could even exist. Don't you see? You just made becoming immortal that much more… _appealing_, it wasn't because I didn't have a choice, I had a choice and I chose you. I wanted this more than you could ever imagine" she was holding my hand her skin ice cold molding into mine.

Looking into her golden brown eyes I marveled at how beautiful my mother is and I am proud that I have her dark brown eyes and rosy red cheeks from when she was human, which are probably the only physical feature, my face shares with hers. My mother is especially beautiful when she and my father go out together. Alice made it sort of an unspoken rule that my mother had to at least dress "properly" on date nights, if it were up to my mother an old t-shirt and some dark blue jeans would suffice.

I sighed. "Sure sure" I said skeptically

She shook her head obviously frustrated with me and this conversation. "What am I going to do with you?" she said as she stood up and kissed me on the forehead, which sent a chill through my body her skin frigid compared to mine.

"I don't know, but I'm leaving in a few if that helps" I laughed as I stood up.

"Oh, is that so?" She said with one eyebrow raised. "I hope this is you asking me and not telling me" she smiled.

"Yea sorry, it's with Jake I figured you wouldn't care"

From the corner of my eye I saw her stiffen, before relaxing again.

"Oh, you're seeing Jake _again_ …tonight? Weren't you with him all morning?"

I looked at her wondering why this was a problem all of a sudden.

"Yea, I didn't realize there was a time limit?" I said this with confusion not with attitude. My mom walked over to the sink and ran the water over the lettuce for the salad she was making for my grandpa Charlie.

"I just think you two are spending a lot of time with one another"

"He's my best friend mom? That's what best friends do they hang out. Like you and Aunt Alice?"

She turned around to look me in the eyes. "That's different Renesmee"

"How?" I said, my voice rising slightly. "No, actually it's _exactly _the same come to think of it."

She sighed as she walked to the fridge pausing before opening it. "Renesmee"

"Yes?" I waited patiently to see where this was going with this.

"Nothing, your right"

Something about the way she was acting didn't sit well with me, I always knew when something was wrong with my mom besides Jacob; my parents were my best friends so for the most part I knew what triggered them.

"Mom, seriously, what's wrong?"

She looked up at me sighing before smiling. "No it's nothing; your grandpa is coming over tonight and I thought you would be here. It's no big deal. Go have fun with Jake"

This excuse was a bad one even for her standards but I let it go, obviously it was not important enough to start an argument over.

"Are you sure? I mean, me and Jake can stay here?"

She smiled as she placed a piece of my hair that had fallen from my ponytail behind my ear. "No, its fine" she took a step back touching both sides of my face as if she were studying my features "Why don't you wear your hair down? You always have it in that messy ponytail"

"You're starting to sound like Aunt Alice, Mom" I joked. She made a face like I'd just called her a bad name.

"What I meant is that your so beautiful Renesmee, I just wish I could see your hair! It's so long and curly but you couldn't tell with the way you wear it"

"Yea, I'm limiting you to only four days a week with Aunt Alice now"

"Ha ha ha" There were three quick thuds at the door and I immediately knew who it was.

"Coming" I called out, as I walked away I heard my mom sigh. I'd get to the bottom of her problem sometime this week, I was determined.

I opened the door and there Jacob stood; shirtless and sweaty. Jacob was the furthest thing away from an _average_ looking person, but it always frustrated me when he showed up without a shirt, even though nothing about it was bad on the eyes; he knew how much it annoyed my father.

"Seriously do we have to go through this every time?" I asked blasé as I turned around walking towards the living room.

"Sorry Ness I phased" he said casually as he walked in closing the door behind him "Hey at least I'm wearing pants" he joked.

"Hardy Har" I said sarcastically. "I'm going to my room to get you a shirt before my dad sees you I think I still have your brown hoodie up there I'll be right back" I quickly ran up the stairs using my vampire speed. I opened three drawers. No hoodie. I dug in my walk through closet –courtesy of my aunts Alice and Rosalie- not a trace of this hoodie. As I knelt under my bed in search of this apparently non existent hoodie I heard muffled voices coming from down stairs.

On all fours I pressed my ear to my dark hard wood floor trying to decipher who was saying what. At first it was completely intangible to hear what was being said, because on top of it being muffled the voices that were -obviously my moms and Jacob's- were whispering as well. Making me just that much more curious as to what was being said.

My instinct was to tip toe to the top of the steps so I could definitely hear better but I knew my mother would hear, smell, feel… just simply sense me there. So I stayed put hoping I could sift through the grumblings and produce a complete coherent sentence or at least combine bits and pieces.

Sounding upset, I finally heard my mother's voice raise an octave as she said what sounded like _Renesmee is almost 18 she needs to know. _What did I need to know? Before I could process that thought I heard Jacob's husky voice and he definitely said _Bella I know, I just want to make sure she will completely understand._

Understand what? What were they keeping from me? Why can't they just tell me? What could possibly be… my thought was interrupted by someone clearing their throat in my door way "Is everything ok love?" my dad asked with sheer curiosity and concern in his voice.

I popped up, knees still on the floor "Oh hey dad, I was just…" I paused I knew I had to stick as close to the truth as possible, that is always the best way to get through a lie. Over the years I'd perfected my ability to control my thoughts so that my father couldn't read the validity of them. Other than showing people my thoughts, I considered me being capable of falsifying my thoughts as a second ability. Sometimes I was a pro and sometimes I would have small slip ups, but never on the important things.

I stuck my head back under the bed "looking for Jacobs hoodie" miraculously the hoodie was there hidden under some books I'd run out of space for so I opted to put them under my bed which were scattered in every direction. "He is down stairs with mom"

"Ok, but I was referring to the fact that you are confused about something, who are _they_?" he asked as he stepped into my room. He had read my thoughts, whether it was on purpose or he was just walking by and heard my ranting; this got so annoying at times.

"_They_…? Oh" I laughed trying to play it off. If I could manage not to think about my mom or Jacob I could easily get out of this one. Unlike my mother I found it very easy to lie, I am not saying it is one of my best qualities but having a mind reader for a father is tough; a teenage girl has to think of ways to have some things to her self, I preferred to keep the _truth_ to myself sometimes especially when it involved my own sanity.

"It's nothing Dad…really… I think a couple of my friends at school are trying to throw me a surprise party… but I am not sure. Everyone has been acting really weird around me and it's making me uncomfortable. So I am hoping it's a party because I can't understand why everyone has been acting so distant the past couple of days"

My dad looked at me, it felt like an eternity before he spoke again and then finally he smiled my mother's favorite crooked smile. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. Your friends love you, I doubt that they don't have anything under their sleeves for you" he walked over to kiss me on the forehead before exiting my room.

As I watched him walk out, I turned around still on the ground placing my back against the side of my bed. I hated lying to my father but it was necessary. I don't want my father tipping off my mom that I knew she and Jacob were talking about me. I wanted to catch her off guard. I wanted to catch _Jacob _off guard since he was obviously the one who was keeping something from me.

I finally got up; hoodie in hand. I made an obvious effort to clear my throat before I walked into the kitchen, making my presence known. I felt no need to rush getting the truth I wanted to play with Jacob's mind before going in for the kill.

"Hey, about time" Jacob said as he reached for the hoodie. I walked past him ignoring his hand and dropping the hoodie on the table. He stood there with his hand still extended. "Ok, what's wrong with you?" he asked confused.

"Nothing" I lied. I saw his eyebrows perch together. Good.

I grabbed my sweater off the back of the kitchen chair and put it on as I walked past Jacob towards the front door "Bye Mom" I yelled back. I knew this scene would cause both of them to wonder why I was acting this way.

I was almost to the trail when suddenly I could sense Jacob directly behind me.

"Ok, talk to me" he said grabbing my elbow trying to force me to stop walking. I yanked my arm away and continued to walk.

"Talk to you about what" I said flatly increasing my pace slightly.

"About what just happened back there?"

"I don't know what you are talking about Jacob" I said formally. It surprised me but he was trying to conceal a snicker. This upset me, I wasn't trying to be funny, I was trying to make his wheels turn; make him beg me to tell him what was wrong. This was amusing?

"What's so funny?" I said angrily; my walking stopping abruptly.

"I'm Jacob now?" he was still trying to hold in laughter. I was confused; I just looked at him waiting for him to continue.

"No Jake or Jakey. Just Jacob, that's usually what you say when you are mad" he mused "but since you say you're not mad I was just a little thrown off that you called me Jacob. That's all."

I shrugged and continued walking. "Ness, seriously what's wrong with you?" he asked, his tone serious now. He grabbed my arm and this time I did stop.

"You tell me?" I snapped

"I have no clue, one second you're fine and the next…"

I interrupted him.

"Well one second you tell me everything and we have no secrets and the next…" I stopped then; folding my arms against my chest. I could see comprehension take over his features.

"Oh" was all he could say. _Oh_, was his brilliant response? I shook my head and walked away, for a moment Jacob did not follow me which was unexpected.

"Nessie" he finally yelled out "let me explain"

I turned around waiting impatiently. As he stood before me, his face was unreadable.

"So you heard me and Bella?" he asked looking like a sad puppy no pun intended.

"What are you afraid to tell me Jake? What don't you think I'll understand? We tell each other everything, it can't be that big of a deal"

He looked at me for a moment, this moment felt like it was soon becoming a century. As I realized he had no response I slowly began to worry. What if it was something serious, like he was leaving Washington or worse what if he was dying and couldn't bare to tell me. At that thought I felt tightness in my throat, heat rise to my face and suddenly my eyes began to water.

"Nessie…Stop, why are you…don't cry" he said almost in shock as he pulled me into his warm chest.

"You don't have to cry, its ok I promise" he whispered, his chin rested on top of my head.

"Then why can't you tell me?" I said trying to conceal sniffling, my voice sounding muffled from being pressed so tightly to his chest. I was already embarrassed that I'd actually started crying but the thought of having a life without Jacob in it was unbearable and since he wouldn't tell me what was wrong I had every right to assume the worst.

"Because Ness, I don't know if you can handle what I have to tell you…well not now at least" his voice was obviously concerned.

"Jake please tell me you aren't dying or something" my face still pressed against his chest, I started to cry harder falling even deeper into misery. He grabbed my arms immediately and removed me from his chest, the look of shock on his face.

"What! No! Ness, I'm not dying!" he yelled out in total surprise.

I looked at him blinking the tears out rapidly trying to comprehend.

"Your not…? Then what is it?" I wiped some tears away on the sleeve of my sweater.

"Wow, you overreact just like your mom!" he said, with a little more amusement in his voice. I wiggled myself out of his hold, punched him in the arm and started walking away.

"Ness, I'm sorry" he caught up to me "wait" his voice was eager. I was completely embarrassed; maybe guilt from making me cry would make him tell me the truth.

"Ok" he said before taking a deep breath. "I love you"

I already knew this; his eyes were cautious and serious as he said the words.

"Ok…? I love you too Jake…I…" he interrupted me before I could finish

"No, Ness, just listen" he moved a step closer to me "I love you so much and I don't want this to scare you"

Afraid to interrupt I just looked at him…waiting.

"Do you remember when I told you about, Clare, Emily and my sister?"

I had to have been at least eleven or twelve when he'd told me this story. I must have had a confused look on my face because instead of waiting for me to remember and respond; he started talking again.

"How they are all imprinted on" he said abruptly as if he were irritated.

"Yea…yes I remember?" I said confusingly.

"And you remember how you asked me if I was ever going to imprint?"

"Yes…you didn't answer me because you said you had to get me home because Edward was acting like a crazy overprotective psycho Dad?"

He snickered at this slightly but his eyes were still serious. A moment passed before he spoke again, taking another deep breath before hand.

"Well, I've imprinted"

"Oh" was all I could say, was he worried that I would be upset about him imprinting on someone? Honestly, I did feel this certain twinge of jealously that surprised me. Who was this girl that would be taking Jacob from me? My stomach felt uneasy, Jacob was right about holding off telling me, my face became hot so I knew my cheeks were now flushing red. I didn't like that fact that Jacob would be spending all of his time with this…_stranger._

"Well" I said trying to sound supportive. "That's… that's great Jake…umm who…" I stopped myself mid sentence. When I realized how intensely Jacob was looking into my eyes, how close he was standing to me, how my mom had reacted earlier about us spending so much time together, how he'd started this conversation off with…_I love you_. Finally I understood. All at once it came together like an intricate puzzle; spending months putting all the pieces into the right places. How dumb of me to be so clueless. Jacob had imprinted on me? When? How? Why? All these questions I had.

"Oh" I said in astonishment. I tried to put a coherent sentence together to no avail. "Jake …I …but…you…when…" he interrupted my rambling.

"Since the second I laid eyes on you, Nessie I've loved you since day one"

I was speechless, what was I suppose to say? The man who I'd known to be my best friend was telling me that we were predestined to be together.

I never thought about Jacob in that way. I'd always felt protective of him and protected by him and safe with him and loved by him at ease and comfortable with him never wanting to part from him when we said our daily goodbyes and longing for him during restless nights wanting him by my side…

My thoughts suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks; subconsciously I've known all a long. I couldn't take being away from Jacob, I'd always felt this hollow insecure loneliness when we were apart that always seemed to vanish when we saw each other again.

How could I have been slow blind? Blind of what was standing right there in front of me.

"Nessie" Jacob said sounding defeated "This is why I didn't think you were ready to know, I didn't want to scare you"

I was confused as to what he was referring to, and then I realized all of my thoughts that were frantically running through my head none of which I verbalized. I must have gone for minutes without speaking.

"No, Jake, it's not that… I am just trying to understand everything…I'm not scared"

"Your not?" he said surprised.

"No" I said unsurely "I think… I think I've always sort have known I guess"

He looked at me; flabbergasted I'm sure this wasn't something he was expecting me to say.

"You knew? How did you know?"

"Well, I didn't _know_ exactly… per say… but I do know that I can't stand to be away from you and that I couldn't live with out you and that…" he took a step closer leaning down; his sweet hot breath tickling my skin his lips but centimeters away from mine, I felt my blood pulsate through my body, my heart beat sped at a rapid pace I still managed to finish my sentence "and…that I love you…" his lips were suddenly pressed against mine muffling the last word.

Every nerve in my body felt like it was set a blaze. I wanted Jacob so badly in that moment, I never wanted us to disconnect from this very moment _ever_. He grabbed both sides of my face with his big hot hands holding me in place. Then his hands slid from my face to my neck, my neck to my shoulders, my shoulders to my waist. The passion that rippled through my body to his and vice versa was so intense that we were a little off balance; shuffling backward until I suddenly felt my back slam against a bark of a tree. _Ow _I thought to myself but it didn't matter, I was too focused.

"Sorry" he whispered breathlessly, his lips still connected to mine. At this moment I didn't have enough _working_ brain cells to say any actual words back, "Mmm hmmm" was all I could manage; not daring to dislodge my tongue from his supple mouth. Jacob's body was pressed against mine the heat radiating; making me feel almost euphoric. I wanted him closer; I wanted to feel him on every inch of my body. My hands were tangled in his hair; I moved them from his hair to his back just beneath his shoulder blades using all of my vampire strength to squeeze him tighter to my body.

Jacob's hands were everywhere and I loved every moment of it, it was hard to think that just ten minutes ago he was just Jake my best friend and now he was _my Jacob my everything. _

Jacob suddenly had his hands under my shirt caressing my back up and down, our breathing both became heavier and uneven. He unlatched my bra, and then moved his hands to the front of my body caressing my breast under my shirt, I moaned in pure pleasure. I'd never done anything like this with a boy before but with Jacob it felt so natural. I moved my hands from behind him and unzipped his hoodie exposing his perfectly sculpted chest I ran my hands down his six pack, firm and rock hard; blindingly I began looking for his belt buckle, fumbling with its latch.

Suddenly Jacob froze and moved his body away from mine; grabbing my hands that were desperately trying to unbuckle his pants.

"What?" I said breathlessly, confusion taking over my senses.

"Ness, we can't do this…not now" his words were breathless as well also wavering like he didn't want to follow his own words.

"But, I thought…"

"I'm sorry this is my fault but there is a lot to discuss before we can…" he stopped, taking two more steps back releasing my hands that had been trying to undo his pants.

"Jake, I'm sorry what did I do wrong?"

"Ness, no, you didn't do anything wrong… there should just be an order to this that we follow, I don't want to mess this up" he stood there not looking me in the eyes.

"Mess what up? You told me about imprinting its predestined nothing can change that"

Jacob finally looked at me; I could see he wasn't going to budge.

"Just trust me on this ok? It's better for you if you just get use to the idea; everyone's had a while to adjust to this and you…" he stopped speaking abruptly him obviously noticing the look on my face.

"_Everyone?_ My family knows about this! Not just my mom?" It upset me to have not been in on it; all the humans, vampires, werewolves knew about _my_ life except me.

"I can't believe this" I said upset at the fact that I'd been so oblivious towards my whole life and everyone knew about it. I wondered how my father felt about this, and then I realized something.

"Oh, I see" I said fastening my bra as I walked past Jacob.

"You see what?" he asked following me pace for pace.

"We didn't do anything now because you're afraid of my father"

It sounded as if Jacob gasped for air he spun me around so quickly I felt slightly dizzy.

"I am not afraid of your father" Jacob said this so intently and seriously; emphasizing each word. I was scared not to believe him.

"Ok" I said yanking my arm from out of his grip "What I mean is that you let him get in your head" I looked in Jacob's eyes, they were still burning mad; my comment really offended him.

"Come on Jacob, you just said _it has to be an order_ _to this_? Seriously…? Those sound like words directly from my father's mouth. Just admit it… he got to you"

Jacob stood there as if he were contemplating what I said. He sighed heavily.

"Ok" he conceded "I may have had a talk with him, but I'm not afraid of your father. This is out of respect for you"

I nodded but wondered how this was respecting me, his rejection actual felt disrespectful.

"Ok… well now what" I asked letting out a heavy sigh. Jacob thought about this for a moment. Then a smile beamed across his face. "Well one more kiss wouldn't hurt" he whispered taking two slow steps closer to me placing one hand and my cheek.

"Would it?" he asked seductively, already lowering his lips towards mine.

"No" I managed to choke out; our lips once again moving in a rhythmic pattern matching our breathing or panting rather. It felt so right, so perfect. This new experience with Jacob felt all too familiar, like I was put here on this earth for this moment for _him. _Like we've had practice and had been doing this for years. At that moment I understood what Jacob had always meant when he said I had a purpose, I just didn't know it yet. My purpose was to be with him, to love him, to cherish every second with him.

I lost my sense of calm, wanting nothing more than to be connected to Jacob. Before I could go for his belt buckle again he stopped kissing me, holding my hands to my side. I sighed in defeat and he smiled.

"Nessie…" Jacob began.

"I know, I know" I interrupted "Order, right. Got it" I smiled sheepishly.

Jacob laughed at my reaction.

"I never knew you had it in you… so aggressive!" he joked.

I punched his shoulder as hard as I possibly could; trying to conceal my own laughter. He rubbed his arm in mock agony then grabbed my hand again. His smile vanished from his face, his features turned serious and he looked deep into my eyes.

"I love you Nessie"

"I love you too Jake"

At that moment that was everything my entire world needed to know. That was all that was important, nothing else mattered and nothing else could dim the light in my heart that shined for Jacob. He was mine and I his.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

My mind was fluttered with so many thoughts; I had to try my hardest to conceal them. Just seconds away from walking through the door I knew my father would hear what had happened between Jacob and I in the woods. I now knew he –and my entire family- knew about Jacob imprinting on me but I am sure he did not want the extra curricular part of it.

I stood there at the steps; taking in a giant breath, becoming grateful I'd asked Jacob to not walk me home, his face and smell and just pure presence would have definitely distracted me. I needed to focus on everything but him. A part of me fought against shoving the memory of what had happened with Jacob and me to the back of my mind. I wanted to relive and go over that moment over and over and over…

"Hi Renesmee what are you doing!" Alice's bell like voice pierced through my thoughts. I jumped, snapping out of my daze.

"Hey Aunt Alice… sorry I guess I was day dreaming" I went to walk passed her but she grabbed my arm.

"Are you sure you are ok? You look…" she stopped speaking abruptly, making an all too familiar facial expression. I froze.

She started squinting as if she were looking through a window covered in snow or mud. Her facial expression loosened slightly then she released my arm.

"Oh" she said as if she were agreeing with me.

"Alice…I…" I said pleadingly.

"No, it's fine. I won't tell Edward" nonchalantly she walked passed me to sit on our porch swing.

"I just wish I could see things more clearly between you and Jacob it's so hard to see, so throw you two together I am almost blind!...but I guess in away I am glad I cant see too much" she seemed disappointed.

I was nervous to ask her what exactly she saw; I knew it wasn't hard to guess since the first thing that came to her mind was to not tell my father. But I wanted to know.

"Umm…Aunt Alice, what exactly did you see?"

She looked at me with an expression I really couldn't identify. For once it looked like she was nervous or embarrassed to say.

"Well, Renesmee…you know Jacob has imprinted on you and you two…well you were both…" she stopped speaking and turned her head quickly towards the woods. I followed her eyes to see what she saw but I saw nothing.

"So yea… we can definitely go shopping this weekend I think we need a girl's day out anyways" Alice beamed.

I looked at her confused, when I heard my fathers voice say _Bella you are such a cheater, I won fair and square _I looked back to the woods and saw my parents walking gingerly together holding hands. I looked back at Alice and mouthed _thank you, _she winked at me smirking slightly.

"Sweetheart" my father said exuberant as he kissed me on the top of my forehead.

"Alice how long have you been here? Sorry if we kept you waiting" he continued.

"No biggie just sitting here with my niece, catching up!"

"Catching up? You have seen her everyday this week!" my mom laughed.

"Yes, but seeing her and _seeing _her are two different things" Alice stated.

A lump grew in my throat I needed to be out of the vicinity of my father before my mind wandered. It was normally easy to control my thoughts but I had never had to hide anything of this magnitude before. I didn't want to take any chances. I needed to figure out me and Jacob before my parents had a chance to intervene.

"Where are you going Nessie?" my dad asked as I got up from the porch swing.

"I'm going to lay down for a bit"

"Are you feeling ok?" my mom asked walking toward me to grab my hand. I had to concentrate extremely hard not to think about Jacob for my father's sake and now try my hardest to not accidentally project my memories to my mother. I thought I was going to have a mental break down.

"Yea… I am fine… just tired" I said quickly

"Oh you did have a busy day, what did you and Jacob get into today?" My father asked. And just like that the mention of _his_ name, my heart sped to an even unhealthier pace than it already beats. Images ran through my mind in an uncontrollable gust. Kissing, heat, panting, lust, love, and his hands my hands his tongue…

My mother's eyes were big in shock, literally at a loss for words. I could not believe that I had lost control of my mind that easily. Though I was scared of what my mother would think I was most afraid by what my father would think I looked at him in the eyes but his expression did not waver. He actually looked as if he were still waiting for a response for the question he'd asked.

"I'm so sorry" I said abruptly yanking my arm from my mothers hold and running into the house. I could feel my mother following quickly behind me. In the midst of it all I heard my father ask Alice _Is it something I said? I'm going in to check on her _and I heard Alice reply _No Edward, let them have there girl talk_. I didn't hear what my father said in return.

"Renesmee" my mom said following me through my bedroom doors.

"I'm sorry I know you and Dad probably hate me…"

"We could never hate you Renesmee, please know that"

I sighed letting out a nervous breath.

"How mad do you think Dad is?" I asked, nervous to hear the answer.

"He didn't hear or see anything"

"What? How?" I didn't understand how he couldn't have I'd stood there right in front of him remembering what had happened between Jacob and I. I'd even thought about what I was sure Alice had had a vision of on the porch.

"I knew something was wrong, I knew you were trying to hide something from your father and I don't want your father getting mad at Jacob."

I still didn't understand.

"I shielded your thoughts from your father" she said flatly "and I am glad I did, we have a lot to talk about"

I breathed in extremely thankful for my mother at this very moment.

"Your father may have accepted the fact that Jacob has imprinted on you but he will not understand what I just shielded from him" my mom said. Her voice serious in a strange unfamiliar way, I wasn't use to, I always considered my mom more of a best friend in most situations but right now she was definitely without a doubt a _mom_.

"I didn't know what happened, I feel like it is something I can't control, like an out of body experience" I said hoping I was wording it right. My mother stiffened taking an unnecessary breath.

"Renesmee, I will not lie to you. I am _happy_ you know about Jacob imprinting on you but this… this can't happen, not this way." Her eyes shifted to my window then back to me.

"If it weren't for Jacob pulling away from you… do you know what could have happened today?"

I looked down at my hands shame blaring across my face. My mother was right what would have happened? I knew the answer to this and it wasn't surprising. But for some reason I couldn't bring my self to apologize for something that _hadn't_ happened. How I felt today I couldn't describe in mere words and the feelings I have towards Jacob are so strong that my body decided to have its own way of _showing_ it. I didn't feel closed or separated from apart of my brain that I couldn't control but I actually felt like I was opening a door to what I was holding back for quite sometime now. I decided at that moment that I wasn't ashamed and that I wasn't going to apologize for _almost_ having sex with the man I am predestined to spend my whole life with.

"… And Renesmee, I know you feel guilty but…"

"No, mom I don't" I said firmly interrupting her.

"Renesmee" my mom said confused, almost shocked at my tone.

"Mom, I feel bad that I tried to hide it from you and dad but I do not feel guilty for how I feel about Jacob…I …love him and everyone including you and dad know that we are going to be together, so apologizing for what's inevitable seems a little pointless to me."

She just stared at me; a stunned look beaming across her face. I felt bad for being so blunt but it needed to be said. Something happened to me today that changed me. My number one priority was Jacob _not_ protecting anyone's feelings including my parents.

"Well…I…" she hesitated "I think that you should take your time, there is no rush"

"Ok, there may not be a rush but what is the hold up? I don't understand why things just can't fall into place?"

"Renesmee…there are just things you need to…know…that I…we… need to discuss with you"

Her expression was nervous which in turn made me slightly antsy, I'd never considered having this identical conversation with my dad, this I was sure would be the most difficult conversation I would ever have.

"Ok, well I know dad will probably…"

"No, Renesmee, when I say we I mean Jacob and me" she looked out towards the window again then back at me.

I thought to myself for a moment, I was down right confused. What could my mother and Jacob have to tell me? My mind drifted back to me and Jacob in the woods earlier today. Jacob had said that there had to be an _order_ and that we had to _discuss _things before…

My feelings towards Jacob were not just sexual obviously but I couldn't understand why this was being such a hindrance on him and I. My mother must have read the expression on my face.

"I think it would be better if Jacob were here to… explain"

"Explain? Explain what?"

I heard the top stair creek and knew my father was about to enter the room. I looked at my mom pleadingly and she nodded.

"I hope I'm not interrupting" he walked to my door stepping one foot inside. "Is everything ok?" a concerned look covered his face.

Before I could speak my mom answered "She is just a little stressed with school, she needs more rest" then she turned to me "you're not a full vampire you know, you have to get your sleep" she winked at me.

I nodded. My father walked over to me a placed an ice cold kiss on my forehead.

"Your mother is right, sweetheart you need to sleep more"

I glanced over at my mother; realizing that if she kept my thoughts shielded for too long that he would notice that he can't hear me. I needed to be able to control my thoughts on my own before this whole thing blew up in my face. My mother read my expression and lifted her shield. _Here we go _I thought to myself. I focused on sleep, school, family, friends, _Jacob_…No! Control Renesmee I thought. Oops.

My father looked at me strangely then his eyes shifted to my mother.

"What's going on?" he said as he sat on the end of my bed next to my mother.

"Nothing" I said a little too quickly.

"Nothing…? Then why was your mother shielding your thoughts?"

My mother froze and a sheepish yet guilty smile slowly crossed her face. My father's eyes left my mothers face - he was obviously annoyed- and he looked at me. I took in a deep breath before speaking.

"I…well, me and Jacob…" I sighed "I know Jacob imprinted me" the words came out in a rush. My father's eyes were liquid topaz; I could see the anger. I knew he knew about Jacob imprinting but I am sure he never prepared for what to do when the time came for his little girl to know who the love of her life was. And it probably didn't help that when I said _I know Jacob imprinted me _my unconscious mind drifted back to the woods with Jacob but only slightly.

My father did not speak. I did not know what was worse him yelling or the silence. There was no point in trying to hide anything anymore facts were fact and the facts were that I loved Jacob and he loved me. If something should happen between us then so let it be. As parents I could understand why they would be hesitant to have their only child fall madly in love and want to start a future as an adult. But nothing about my life- half human half vampire- in love with a werewolf who happens to be best friends with my once human, now vampire mother was normal.

We lived in a world of make believe of fiction according to any on lookers eyes, so why should everything be so conventional when it came to Jacob and I, we were anything but conventional.

"That is not the point Renesmee" my father said angrily; he'd obviously been reading my thoughts "You are too young, for decisions like this" he was speaking through his teeth not a good sign.

"Dad, I turn 18 in …"

"It doesn't matter, you are too young. Period"

His tone and his absolute way of answering like there was no other solution, rubbed me the wrong way.

"_I'm_ too young? Well how old was your beloved Bella when you swept her off her feet? I am sure Grandpa Charlie would have had some objections too!" my words were like little sarcastic thorns, they ripped through my teeth with such anger that I would ordinarily never speak towards either one of my parents.

My mom gasped in shock at my outburst, my father was angered too the core, truly surprised maybe hurt by my accusation. Silence fell over the room before my father spoke again

"Renesmee, there is a lot you don't know" my father said, trying to keep some level to his voice.

"Everyone is telling me that, but no one is telling me what I need to know. I know this is hard because I am technically eight years old but you guys know how mature I am. I won't make any decisions that I will regret and if I do _I'll_ deal with it"

My parents looked at each other; my mother was obviously shielding them together so that he could read her thoughts. Finally, my father nodded.

"You are…very mature Renesmee. Just know that we…your mother and I…" my mom faked a cough interrupting my father then nudging him in that same motion. My father sighed "and Jacob" he continued "are just trying to protect you".

"Trying to protect me from what?" I said when my parents both glanced out of the window. I turned to see what was so fascinating when I heard my father let out a frustrated sigh as he said; speaking through his teeth "Alright. Fine" I was still looking out of the window when suddenly a loud crash frightened me out of my gaze. It was Jacob, crashing into my bedroom window. Wearing only black cargo shorts and nothing else, my heart sped, not because I was startled but because my mind couldn't help but follow the ripples of his perfectly sculpted chest.

My father coughed loudly and unnecessarily, he did not want to read where my thoughts were going to obviously end up. My mother grabbed my fathers hand as she got up from my bed. Before they walked out of the room my mother looked back and stared at Jacob intently in the eyes. Almost as if they were communicating in some code only they understood.

I always got jealous when they did this; Jacob and my mom were best friends and had a huge history with each other that stemmed back from before I was born. I hated that I in a way had to share my best friend with my mom because there was always going to be this part of Jacob that she knew that I didn't because I didn't exist yet.

My parents left my room and headed down the stairs. Jacob sat on my bed and I heard my father cough loudly again. Jacob jumped back off the bed and yelled out "Sorry" as he tried to muffle a laugh.

"What's going on Jacob?" it was hard for me to focus on the seriousness of this conversation, with Jacob standing there shirtless and beautiful and flawless and in _my room_ inches away from my bed…with my parents and aunt down stairs…right. _Focus Renesmee._

"Nessie there is no easy way to say this…and if you think about it, it's not a big deal"

"Well if it's not big deal, then spill it!" I demanded.

Jacob sighed and sat back down on my bed. He folded his hands in his lap.

"Well, it's about your mother"

I looked at him confusingly.

"Your mother and _me _before you were born"

"Ok, Jacob I'm lost?"

"Our relationship before you were born was…_different _than it is now." He said this without making eye contact.

I looked at the side of his face trying to figure out what could possibly be so serious between my mom and Jacob before I was born that would effect how I felt about Jacob today. And for the second time today a puzzle was put together, a puzzle that had been right in my face the whole time. I gasped and jumped off my bed.

"What!" I said; my voice booming out louder than I thought it was capable of "You and….and my mother!" my voice shrieked through the entire house, I was sure of it.

"Ness..." Jacob said as he jumped off the bed and tried to grab my arm; to calm me down I presume.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled, liquid filling my eyes.

"Nessie, your overreacting"

"I'm overreacting? I am under reacting!" I was yelling at the top of my lungs. I'm sure at any moment my parents would be up here trying to defuse the situation.

"Ness, you can't just make up words because you're mad" he tried to grab my arm again but I yanked it away.

"Jacob, this is not a joke and you know what I mean" I truly felt disgusted that the man I would spend the rest of my life with had actually preferred my mother over me, but since she wasn't available, I guess I would suffice, coming in at a close second I assume.

"I'm sorry, just let me explain, it's not what you think, Bella and I…"

"No Jacob, I don't need to hear it, you slept with my mom and now you're trying to get some action from the daughter?"

"Nessie, wait, what?? That's not…"

Before I knew it I was out of my window and half way through the woods. I didn't know when I would come back, I didn't know if I wanted to but I knew I couldn't stay there looking like an idiot.

I felt someone chasing behind me as I breezed through the woods, I was sure it was Jacob. I didn't want him to catch up with me and I didn't want to see his face. So I accelerated my speed and made a sharp left turn, I got a whiff of who was following me and I was shocked to realize it was _not_ Jacob.

It was a scent of someone I did not recognize and this scent was undeniably a vampire.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The scent was subtle and new, _definitely_ a vampire I didn't know. Panic coursed through my body at that moment. My parents always warned me about leaving the house alone, or if I do let them know where I was going so Alice could try to _see_. There was reason for this and I understood why they were so over protective. The Volturi.

After the Volturi came to _visit _us when I was younger I knew that there were always going to be eyes watching out for me. This was something that I had accepted; it came with the territory of being _one of a kind_ my parents would say I preferred to call it being a huge mistake.

"Renesmee" the warm voice, with a strong accent called out. The voice was not Italian which made me feel slightly better but it was a man's voice a voice that was unfamiliar. I didn't dare to stop running, but I realized I couldn't just run forever and I wouldn't turn back around and bring this vampire back to my home with my family. Even though he'd already seen where I lived I'm assuming.

I took a deep breath, having faith in the fact that either one of my parents would come looking for me, Alice would see something and send someone for me or Jacob would come, even though he and my mother were the last people I wanted to see. After talking myself up a few times I took in a deep breath and stopped suddenly halting immediately.

The gust from the vampire flying past me almost knocked me over. Before I could realize how quickly the vampire whipped past me he had already turned around and was standing directly in front of me. Face to face.

"Renesmee" he said as if to say _finally. _I looked at the lanky man, his skin a rich dark brown and his long black hair in disarray from the running. He was strikingly beautiful.

"You do not remember me do you?" he asked politely.

I never forgot a face; my memory was the one thing that could not be questioned. I knew exactly who it was. As soon as this vampire stood before me I heard his heart beat and to know a thing or two about a vampire was that their hearts didn't beat unless you were me or…

"Nahuel" I said in amazement. I'd remembered that cold day in the clearing like it was yesterday. Alice had left to find witnesses -to prove to the Volturi guard that I wasn't dangerous- one being Nahuel who in all actuality saved my family's life and mine. He too was half vampire, half human. His very existence spared us a fight with the Volturi.

"Yes. You do remember" he beamed, his perfect teeth so bright they were almost painful –in a good way- to look at.

"How could I forget …you saved my life and my family…and friends…I…"

"No need for that Renesmee, I just came and spoke the truth that is all"

"Well, still…thank you…again" there was an awkward silence when a question -that any non distracted person would have asked an old friend they hadn't seen in years- popped into my head.

"Nahuel, why are you here?" I didn't want to sound rude but I was curious.

"It's a little complicated" he said bashfully.

"Oh, well if it's anything I can help you with. Just let me know."

He smiled that amazing gleaming smile again and said "Thank you…I actually think you _can_ help. I'll let you know" his eyes bore into mine. I was mesmerized by his beauty.

"Oh…okay" I stuttered, looking down breaking the eye contact solidly. "Why don't you come back to the house, I know my parents would love to see you" the words came out before I could stop them. I'd forgotten that quickly why I'd stormed out of my house in the first place. Going back was the last thing I wanted to do.

"Ok, that sounds great" he obliged. _Great. _

"Is there something wrong?" he asked. Obviously reading my facial expression.

"I…" I stopped then and shook my head "No, actually it's nothing"

"I'm pretty sure there was a reason you left your house at full speed, not bothering to use the door and why you look hesitant to go back now"

I didn't want to question how long had he been ease dropping but I did want to question why he even cared so much to ask.

"Well if you must know" I said jokingly "I got into an argument with my…"

What do I refer to Jacob as? At this point I wasn't even sure I wanted to ever see him again, even if I was trying to force away and deny the whole mythological imprinting that pre ordered and pre packaged Jacob specifically for me.

"…friend and it got kind of heated and I needed some fresh air" I continued.

"Oh, well I'm sure this _friend _is sorry and probably would never do anything to intentionally hurt you" his voice deep and warm.

I was taken a back. "How do you figure that?" I asked curiously.

"Look at you Renesmee; no one would dare hurt you in anyway on purpose, your way too…special."

I could feel my face flush.

"Whether intentional or not I am hurt and I don't know if I'm capable of _not _being hurt" these words came out with no guard or walls blocking there honesty. I only spoke my true feelings to my dad, my mom and Jacob and yet it was so easy for me to be honest with this man who is by all means a stranger- I having met him only once when I was just a child.

"Well curse anyone who could bring you pain" he said jokingly -but I could hear the underlined seriousness in his tone - as he gently grabbed my hand. His skin as smooth as silk, I was lost in his eyes; my trance only being interrupted by two loud raspy coughs. Causing Nahuel and I to both jump and turn to the direction of the noise.

"Jacob" I said startled, pulling my hand from Nahuel's hold. "This is Nahuel, do you remember him?" I asked my voice a little shaky in regards to this uncomfortable situation.

Jacob just glared, nodding his head ever so slightly. I could see the glint of anger in his eyes, how he looked at me as if I were his territory and Nahuel was stepping on his private property.

Nahuel extended his hand towards Jacob; rudely Jacob just stared at Nahuel in the eyes leaving Nahuel's hand alone in the air. I could feel the intensity and awkwardness of the moment so thick one could cut it with a knife.

"So, Jake I was just telling Nahuel to come back to the house I know everyone would be excited to see him…it's been such along time" my voice unsteady fighting against the nervousness.

Jacob said nothing.

"I'll…ah…head to the house Renesmee" Nahuel lowered his hand and looked at me. "I'll meet you guys there"

Nahuel began to walk towards Jacob "Nice meeting you…again, I guess you could say"

Jacob said nothing. I couldn't believe how rude he was being, it was embarrassing. A moment later Nahuel was gone and it was just me and Jacob standing there silently almost in the exact place we'd kissed for the first time this morning.

"Wow, Jacob how incredibly rude" I hissed.

"Rude? We get into one fight and your goo goo eyed over some Amazon!" he spat back

"Oh please Jacob, what are you talking about? He is just a family friend"

"Hey just a couple of hours ago I was _just_ a family friend" he countered.

"You know what? Your right, it's not my fault your wolfy magic changed that" I threw the words at him like they were daggers as I tried to storm past him he jumped in front of me blocking my path.

"Wolfy magic Nessie…? That's how you look at it?" he sounded almost sad, but I couldn't pay attention to that now we were fighting and I knew I was right.

"Jacob, there wouldn't even be a; you and me if it wasn't for this mythical mail order bride thing. You want my mom, I'm sorry my dad's standing in your way" the words came out harsher than I intended them to but I couldn't back down now.

I saw the pain in his eyes, no matter how upset and hurt I was; it literally killed me to see Jacob in pain physically and emotionally.

"You can't honestly think that's the case Nessie? I don't want your mom. Yes there was a time that I had feelings for your mom when she was…alive" he fumbled over the last word. "But from the second I saw you I knew that one day you would be mine and I would be yours."

He took a step closer to me.

"Don't you see? I was put in your mom's life to meet you; everything that happened was so that one day we could be together"

I could look in his eyes and hear the sincerity in his voice, I knew he wasn't lying but I was still uncomfortable with the fact that they'd had a relationship at all.

"…And me and your mother never had sex Nessie, that, I swear to you…your father is the only one she…" his sentence trailed off, his face strained like he didn't want to think about the fact that my mother and father have had sex.

I felt relief overwhelm me before I could speak again.

"Did you kiss her?" I asked blatantly. His facial expression said it all.

"Of course you did" I shook my head and walked past him, this time he let me go without any attempts to stop me. A part of me wanted him to follow, but what was there to say? I knew what I needed to know and it was actually way more than I wanted to know.

I finally got to my house it seemed like it took forever. I didn't have the energy to run my full vampire speed. I think I was literally emotionally drained. But who wouldn't be under these circumstances? How would anyone deal with the fact that your current boyfriend –if that is what I should call him- who you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with, told you that he once was involved with your mother? Any sane person would react the same way I did, maybe even worse.

I just wanted to be by myself but there was no where I could go for that.

I stopped at the end of the trail leading to my house, when I saw Nahuel sitting on my porch looking focused. I took in a deep breath and started to walk towards him.

"Hey, why are you out here?" I asked sitting down next to him.

"Oh" he replied as if I broke his concentration, like he hadn't sensed me near him which was hard to believe seeing that we both have extremely enhanced senses.

"No one was home, so I figured I'd wait here for you, I didn't want to go and get you"

"Why?" I asked stupidly

"Because, I don't think your friend likes me too much" he chuckled "And it looked like you two needed to have a serious conversation I didn't want to interfere"

Nahuel was obviously being genuine and considerate the exact opposite of how Jacob had treated him earlier. There was something about Nahuel that was so inviting and welcoming, it was refreshing.

Straining to focus my thoughts I finally spoke "I'm so sorry about Jacob, he was being a complete Jerk I…" he interrupted before I could finish.

"No, I completely understand. I would act the same way if I were in his position. Girl's like you are hard to come by, so if you have to fight to keep them then fighting to death is the only option"

I stared at him blankly, discomforted by the butterflies I felt in my stomach.

"Umm" I managed to choke out "So, you said my parents aren't home?" I'd honestly meant to ask the question earlier but I was distracted.

"I knocked no answer" he answered simply.

I wondered where they ran off too. I wonder if they were looking for me. Not likely. Jacob probably talked them into letting him speak with me first.

"Well come in and wait" I said as I stood up "I'm sure they wont be gone long"

He stood up and followed me inside.

"Would you like anything?" I asked not knowing if he would prefer human food or blood.

"A glass of water would be nice" he said politely as he sat down at the kitchen table.

"Coming right up" I teased.

"So Renesmee…"

"Please…call me Nessie, My mom is the only one that is hell bent on calling me Renesmee" I laughed as I handed him his glass of ice water.

"Oh ok, so _Nessie_" he corrected himself with a smile "Tell me what's been going on in your life in the last seven in a half years"

I sat down beside him, not knowing exactly where to start.

"Hmm" I said as I tried to sift through my memories; so many to choose from, how much did he want to know? I spoke my thought a loud "What exactly do you want to know?" I asked skeptically.

"Everything if you don't mind" he smiled.

"Everything…? Well that might take some time"

"I have nothing but time" his tone was serious.

I thought to myself for a moment then a light bulb went off.

"Wow, I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner" I said slightly upset with myself.

"What?" confusion plainly on his face.

"Give me your hand" I said as I reached one hand out towards him. He obliged.

I projected my memories to him through my hands starting with the very first one I'd ever had, seeing my mother bleeding and battered and broken because of me, the first time I'd seen my mother as a vampire, the Volturi in the clearing that day, Nahuel as he walked into the clearing with his family and Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper, me racing Jacob on hunting trips, my first birthday in which I looked to be about 4 or 5 years old, the heart to heart conversations I would have with my mother, learning how to knit with my Grandma Esme, talking on the phone with my Grandma Renee.

The long walks Jacob and I would have when I was growing up, my first day of school after begging to be allowed to attend school I had to wait until my growing stopped which it did stop when I was 5 in half years old. I started my sophomore year of high school that year. I showed him; wrestling with Jacob in his wolf form as my family looked on and laughed, watching football with my Uncle Emmett, studying with my Grandpa Carlisle, fishing with my Grandpa Charlie, shopping with my aunts Alice and Rosalie, driving for the first time with my dad the only time he was ever a stickler about doing the actual speed limit, me sneaking out to La Push in the middle of the night only to have Jacob bring me right back home.

So many things I showed him in a flurry of glimpses, and then I got to more recent times. Hanging out with Jacob this morning, talking to my mom in the kitchen, talking to my dad in my room, being mad at Jacob, Jacob and I in the woods, Jacob telling me he imprinted on me, me telling Jacob I loved him, Jacob kissing me, running his hands all over my body.

I quickly yanked my hand from Nahuel's hold. What was I thinking? I can't believe I'd just showed him something that intimate, I was extremely embarrassed. Today was not my day for self control… at all.

"I'm sorry" I said quickly forfeiting eye contact.

"It's ok, Nessie, I told you I wanted to see everything" he laughed in amazement "And that definitely was… _everything_" he continued.

I was drowning in embarrassment.

"No seriously its ok" he obviously read my facial expression "I see that Jacob is very important to you it's nothing to be embarrassed about"

All I could manage to do was nod my head in agreement.

"Can I ask you something though… if you don't mind?"

"Sure" I said, still not making eye contact

"Can you explain this imprinting thing to me?"

I was caught off guard; I definitely wasn't expecting that to be the question he wanted to ask.

"Oh" I tried to gather my words correctly, hoping I got them just right "Well like I showed you before Jacob can transform into a werewolf. And like with wolves; when they find a female wolf to mate with they are pretty much stuck on that female wolf. They only want to be with that wolf"

Nahuel was starring at me intently. I felt like I wasn't explaining it right at all.

"So, I guess you could say the human part of Jacob and the other members of his pack when they see a girl; if that girl is the… one, some type of unworldly connection is bonded between them without any warning. It just…happens. It's pretty much predestined. It's something that's uncontrollable but also undeniable"

"So, wait…you're saying you were chosen against your will?" Nahuel quizzed.

"Well… yea but…I…"

"You had no say in it… at all?" he interrupted.

"No, not exactly, but I love …"

"So what were to happen if you met someone else?"

I looked at him for a moment I honestly didn't know the answer to that question. I never considered meeting anyone else I didn't think that was even palpable.

"I don't know" I said conceding "It's predestined so no matter what Jacob and I are suppose to be together"

Nahuel nodded as if he were contemplating something.

"Alright, I get it" he smiled "So for example if you met someone that you felt really comfortable with and there was definitely chemistry there it wouldn't matter right?"

"Umm…no…I guess not"

"And if that person found you extremely attractive and he assumed you found him attractive that doesn't matter at all?"

"No, I don't think so"

"And what if …" he inched closer to me; only centimeters away from me "that person wanted to kiss you?"

My mind was running at a rapid pace I knew where this was leading and yet I sat there with him only centimeters from my lips. Why was this connection with Nahuel so strong? It was so hard to even try and put up a fight. I'd only met this man one other time in my entire life but I felt something so gravitating about him; it was hard to just deny it. The bigger-surprisingly- part of my brain wanted to push Jacob to the corner of my mind and kiss Nahuel right at the moment, but a smaller yet louder part was telling me to leave and think of how hurt Jacob would be.

I only had a moment to make a decision. Nahuel moved in closer; only milliseconds away from his lips pressing against mine.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 The Real Stranger

What was I doing? This couldn't happen, I barely knew Nahuel. I jumped up literally seconds before his lips could meet mine.

"I'm sorry…I can't I'm… _with_ Jacob I can't jeopardize that" the words came out faster than I expected; this was the first time I'd actually claimed Jacob. Though trivial under this circumstance it was important to me.

"Don't apologize, it was my fault. It's just that I feel this pull towards you that I cannot explain but nevertheless that was completely inappropriate of me and _I_ apologize"

I sat back down not knowing what to say next.

"How about this" he laughed "let's say that never happened?"

"Yea, I think that's best" I smiled

"Friends…?" he extended his hand towards me,

"Friends" I agreed shaking his hand at the same time.

The front door opened and I immediately knew it was my mother.

"Renesmee who is here with you?" she yelled out panicked, obviously she sensed an unfamiliar vampire's scent in the kitchen. Before I could respond she was already in the kitchen crouched in a defensive stance a low growl vibrating from her throat and chest truly looking like a vampire.

"Mom it's ok. It's Nahuel" I said placidly.

"Nahuel…?" she looked miffed "I'm so sorry… how are you?" she stood upright looking more like my mom again instead of a vampire ready to rip someone's head off.

"I'm great. How are you Bella?" he stood up to hug her.

"I'm fine…wow it's so nice to see you, what brings you here?"

"Mom" I interrupted "before you two catch up can you take your shield off of me?" I asked a little annoyed.

"Oh, sorry" she smiled as she lifted the shield from me.

"Nahuel where are you staying?" she asked him

"I actually haven't thought that part through yet"

Before my mother could offer up one of our spare bedrooms I interrupted.

"Mom I was actually going to ask Grandma and Grandpa, I am sure they wouldn't mind" I turned to Nahuel "You don't mind that do you?"

"No I don't mind, thank you I really appreciate this"

"Ok, well that's settled. Everyone will be so happy to see you; it's been…what…? Almost eight years?" my mom asked.

"Just about" Nahuel said smiling that smile that could back up traffic for miles. I didn't see how he could be around humans-if he was, I hadn't asked him any questions like that yet- that smile surely would blind their weak eyes.

"Renesmee where is Jacob?" my mother asked and just hearing her say his name brought back all the anger I had that somehow being in the same room with Nahuel made me forget. I didn't want to hear Jacob's name or see my mother's face at this moment.

Before I could respond with a rude remark Nahuel spoke.

"I actually met him, Ness…Renesmee introduced us, real nice guy… he actually had something to take care of at home but he said he will probably come back later tonight"

I was impressed; Nahuel just saved me from an argument with my mother – even though this argument is inevitable- and didn't even know that part. But he did know that I wasn't ready to talk about Jacob. I commend him for lying about how nice Jacob was even though Jacob was a complete jerk and didn't deserve the kind words.

"Well that's good I'm glad you two are getting along" my mom replied quickly looking at me, she knew we had to speak about she and Jacobs relationship before I was born. And she knew I wasn't happy about it, but who would be?

"Come on Nahuel, I'll take you to the main house where my grandparents live. I'll even help you map your way around it, they've added two wings and a fifth floor since the last time you were here" I said as I walked towards the front door. In the corner of my eye I could see my mother grimace. She hated how extravagant our family was.

Two years ago she had to plea bargain with my father about our cottage; he wanted to add two floors and add six bedrooms in the back. My mother did not understand the need for a house that big with only three people _living_- and I use the term _living_ loosely- in it and only one that slept. He came up with some off the wall story about guest being able to stay and have their own privacy –ironic coming from a mind reader- and he used me as an example; saying if I wanted to have friends over, more room would have to be made to accommodate.

My mother found some merit in his argument and the compromise was to add only one floor and to only add three bedrooms in the back. It always makes me laugh because in away my father still got his way; as big as these bedrooms are they could easily be turned into 6 or 7 nice sized rooms or 11 or 12 small dorm like rooms.

"It was nice seeing you again Bella, thank you so much for the hospitality" Nahuel said as he hugged her once more.

"Anytime" she smiled at Nahuel, then she turned towards me "Ah, Renesmee can I talk to you for a minute in the other room?"

I was surprised that she'd be the one to want to confront the topic and I was surprised that now _I _wasn't ready to talk about it. Talking about something always makes it real; I wasn't quite ready for this to be real yet.

"Sorry mom, we're in a hurry maybe later" I bolted through the door so fast that I couldn't hear if she'd responded. I know that was immature and that I couldn't avoid it forever but I wanted to talk about it on my terms.

I honestly wanted to talk to Jacob we'd never gone this long being upset with one another with no clear solution, but at this point it was too hard seeing myself being ok with what happened between my mom and Jacob.

And then there's the imprinting; am I just wasting time being mad because no matter how much we argue or how upset I am; I'm still going to end up with him? Or can I control it? Can I be mad enough to forgo this mapped out future that imprinting has laid out for me? What happened in there with Nahuel was still ticking like a time bomb in the back of my mind.

I was capable of being attracted to someone else, and I was even capable of acting on that attraction. Even though Nahuel and I didn't kiss, I credit that to my morals and respect for Jacob not because imprinting casts some magic unforeseen spell that prevents me from being with anyone other than Jacob.

"Hey slow down…remember I'm not from around here" Nahuel yelled out humorously. I'd completely forgotten he would be following me. I hated when my mind ran away like that.

"Sorry" I said as I came to a complete stop.

"You're very…very fast!" he remarked; sitting down on the bark a few feet away from me.

"Almost as fast as my dad, I guess you can say I got my speed from him" I laughed; knowing that my mortal mother was a far cry from what one would call athletic.

Nahuel stopped laughing, his face turning slightly serious. "Nessie, I don't mean to be rude or pry, but what's going on? I see that your problem isn't only with Jacob but you seemed a little mad at your mom as well"

Nahuel was very perceptive and very right. As soon as he asked the question I wanted to immediately tell him everything. It was so easy for me to just want to let him in on everyone of my problems and have him help me solve them, but I couldn't. This door I did not want to open.

"It's a long story; we can talk about it another time. We should get going though it's getting late" I stood up and started walking.

"Yea, we wouldn't want to keep your grandparents up late waiting for us" Nahuel said sarcastically knowing that my grandparents didn't sleep.

"Ha ha, you're just a bundle of jokes aren't you?"

We finally got to the house. After all the hugs and welcome backs I got Nahuel settled into his room, and then I headed back to my house.

I couldn't believe how my day turned out. I woke up this morning, just like any other day and now as the day closes I find out my best friend is madly and uncontrollably in love with me through the magic of imprinting, an old family friend comes back and the attraction is so strong it's almost painful to ignore and worst of all I find out that Jacob once had a relationship with my mother.

The only thing keeping me sane was the thought that things could be worse. I couldn't see it now but I needed to think this in order to not go entirely crazy. I just stood in the woods for a while losing track of time, sifting through my many disturbing thoughts over and over again, replaying my day in my mind like a broken record. Completely lost in my thoughts, I barely noticed how late it'd gotten and how dark it was. My family was probably starting to worry.

Walking at a human pace I heard a ruffling noise in the bushes a few meters away from me, automatically I breathed in a quick gust of air, trying to see if I recognized the scent, obviously hoping it was an animal. But the wind was very strong and distorted any trace of what was out there. I didn't panic, but I knew it would probably be wise of me to get home as quickly as possible.

As soon as I begun to dart out in a full blown run to my house, I heard a scream, a high piercing scream. I stopped dead in my tracks. The octave of the scream echoed through the forest. It was obviously a human girl. I couldn't just ignore this poor human girl's cry for help. As quickly as 2 seconds I debated whether to run to my house and get my parents and bring them to this girl or just go to her myself. What if running back to my house took too much time and by time we came back it was too late to help her?

My feet were running in full vampire speed towards the scream before I had even officially made a conscience decision to find this girl. Her cries for help were getting louder and closer every millionth of a second, when suddenly they stopped.

I stopped running, trying to figure out which direction to run to now. Without the screams I didn't know where to go. I stood there feeling hopeless; I turned my head with the hammering wind hoping that I would be able to track this girl's scent. I knew that would be the only way I could find her.

Suddenly, like a ton of bricks, the scent of fresh human blood permeated the air making my throat burn slightly. Over the years I'd learn to resist the calling of human blood and the effect it had on me, but that burning always found its way back to the very back of my throat especially if the blood was exposed.

Ignoring the uncomfortable itching and burning sensation in the back of my throat, I took in another huge breath with the wind hoping this time I could decipher a direction to run and find this girl.

I froze. My heart started beating at a pace that would have more than likely sent a full human into cardiac arrest. The scent of the human blood was now joined by the strong overwhelming scent of a vampire. I spun around quickly towards this strong over barring scent, as the reality of the situation set in, there was a vampire here and this vampire was killing an innocent girl. My breathing hitched and my face felt hot and my head started to pound.

I didn't know if I was more afraid at the fact that there was an unfamiliar vampire here this close to my home and loved ones or the fact that this girl has no hope of surviving; her life over at the hands of one of my kind.

I knew at that point that I couldn't go to the girl by myself. As independent as I was and as strong as I am, I couldn't compare to the strength of a full blown vampire. He'd just finish off the girl and then kill me.

Quickly I decided to run to my house and tell my parents, so that we could figure this out. I spun around in a haze so quick that a human's eye wouldn't have detected any movement at all. The wind scathing against my skin, I was running so fast it didn't feel like my feet were even touching the ground. When suddenly I smacked into what felt like a giant glacier of ice; the impact caused me to fly backward slamming my back into a tree that was about 15 feet away.

Pulling my self apart from the tree-and noticing the indentation I'd left in its trunk- standing in front of me was a tall, very, tall figure. He had to have been over seven feet. He had on all black, his skin dark causing him to look like a silhouette against the night. His hair was long and black, blowing in the wind as he stood before.

The most important characteristic was the fact that he was obviously and most definitely a vampire. It was hard to see his full features in the pitch black night but I could smell the girl's blood blowing off of him with each gust of wind. I could see the glistening of the girl's blood on his lips.

I felt sick to my stomach. There had only been one other time that I was this scared and that was when the Volturi were voting whether to spare my families life or not.

The black silhouette that was about 15 or 20 feet away from me was now standing literally inches from me. I jumped; completely startled that he was now so close to me. I stood breathing heavily each breath being trickled with the scent of that poor innocent girl's blood.

He stood there motionless as did I. All the years of being told what to do and what not to and how to stay safe and stay close to family all meant nothing. I was going to die here. What would this do to my mom, my dad, my entire family, my…_Jacob_? At the thought of Jacob a lump grew in my throat, I was sure tears would be pummeling out at any second but I had to be strong. I wouldn't give this vampire the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

"Why so glum beautiful?" the deep raspy voiced asked me. It startled me to hear him speak. His voice saturated in a heavy accent and the tone so deep it sounded as if it were vibrating from his chest.

I didn't speak I stood there, squeezing the charm on the bracelet Jacob had gotten me for my second birthday. For some odd reason, this was keeping me somewhat calm.

The vampire smiled; his teeth blindingly bright "Amazing" he said astonished.

He lifted his hand slowly causing me to stiffen. He slowly placed his hand on my chest, gently until he completely covered my heart. He smiled then put his hand back to his side.

"Your heart beats…and yet you're a vampire…amazing" he said again.

"Your heart is fluttering at a rapid pace, I must say. Is that normal, or is that because of me?" he said as if we were friends.

I didn't speak, I couldn't speak. I wondered how long he would go on with the preliminaries before he would finally kill me.

"I've always found half mortal and half immortals quite…_interesting_…you could say"

The vampire took his hand again and softly placed it against my left cheek. His hand was freezing cold against my hot flushed skin. He took his other hand and slowly slid it under the back of my sweater, rubbing my lower back in a circular motion as he pulled me closer to him. I froze then, everything coming into place, I knew what he wanted to do, what he was going to do. I would prefer death over this a million times over.

"You're nervous, there is no need to be…your so beautiful…this won't hurt one bit" he said in a teasing way "Well, maybe a little bit, but you're a strong girl" he smiled.

He took the hand that had been on my cheek and slowly moved it to my chest cupping my breast. I was as still as stone. He leaned his nose into the curve of my neck breathing in deeply.

I felt like I was going to black out, it seemed like my whole life was going to flash before my eyes. I couldn't let this happen, I wouldn't. He would have to kill me before I just sat there and let him have his way with me.

At that thought I decided I was going to use every ounce of strength in me and every decimal of speed to escape. Yes, he would probably catch me but I wasn't going to let this just be easy for him.

He looked up from my neck and then started to lean down towards my face, I closed my eyes took in a deep breath preparing myself to run like I'd never ran before. When I heard my name being called in the distance, the vampire stopped and looked up toward where the voice was coming from.

"Jacob" I whispered breathlessly to myself relief taking over my senses.

"Hmm, maybe we can continue this party another time" the vampire said. He released his hold on me and once again I fell back into the tree. "I'll be back, please don't wait up for me" the vampire smiled and was gone as quickly as I could comprehend what he said.

In that same gust of wind I turned around and saw Jacob walking up. The joy that conquered my body wasn't like anything I'd ever experienced.

I ran so fast into his arms slamming against his chest. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and my legs around his waist.

"Nessie…? What's wrong are you ok?" Jacob asked confused as he patted my hair and rubbed my back.

I couldn't speak, I was sobbing uncontrollably in to his shoulder. I never wanted to let him go. I didn't want to open my eyes and realize what had almost happened. I just wanted to stay there in Jacobs arms…forever.

Jacob was about to ask me another question when the wind picked up again brushing by both of us; he suddenly pulled me off of him. His face was blaring with anger. I was confused. He spun his head around quickly and then back to me.

"I smell a vampire" he was speaking through his teeth. "What the hell happened?"

"It's ok" my voice shaky and unconvincing. "This girl was screaming…" I began to tell the story.

"What girl?" he quizzed his teeth still clenched.

"I don't know, but I went to find her and I smelled her blood and a… vampire" I was still crying, the tears flowing uncontrollably.

Jacob stiffened I could literally see the heat radiating off of his body.

"When I realized it was a vampire, I turned around to go home and get help but…" I choked over my words the lump of the fear I had rose in my throat.

"But I turned around and he was standing right there in front of me" I stopped speaking. It was too hard to have to relive this all over again so soon.

"Renesmee" Jacob said angrily. I still didn't speak I knew Jacob's temper. I didn't want him going after this vampire by himself or at all for the matter.

"Renesmee, what the _hell_ happened? Did he touch you?" Jacob started shaking, I didn't want him to phase and I didn't want him to leave my side. It was too hard to get the words out, so I grabbed Jacobs hand and showed him exactly what happened from the very beginning.

Jacob snatched his hand out of mine and started trembling uncontrollably, I knew it would only be seconds before he phased and I didn't want that. All my life Jacob told me if I ever saw him lose his temper and he was about to phase, to move because he could hurt me on accident but I knew he couldn't no matter how uncontrolled he thinks he is.

I walked up to him, using all my vampire strength to hug his arms to his sides. If I could just get him to look into my eyes he would be fine. Still gripped around his arms I stood on the tips of my toes and kissed him on his cheek. "Please Jake, breath, calm down…just look at me" I kept kissing him all over his face and repeating that sentence until I finally got him to make eye contact. He slowly started breathing a little more steadily until his trembling finally stopped.

"I'll kill him" he whispered angrily. "Nessie" he breathed out heavily.

"I know Jake" I agreed with him. I knew the anger he was feeling.

"I should have been here to protect you, you shouldn't have been out here by your self…I'm so…"

"No, Jake…this is not your fault. I won't let you apologize for something you had nothing to do with"

Jacob wrapped his arms around me and kissed me on my forehead.

"Let's go tell your parents" Jacob said softly. "If you thought you had to calm me down, wait until Edward hears about this"

As we walked to my house the only thing I could focus on was holding Jacobs hand. I didn't want to think outside of that little bubble that belonged to him and me. I kept going over what nearly happened and it sent chills down my spine. My thoughts drifted to that innocent girl that I had initially been trying to save. I wondered if he had just drunk her blood or did he also…

I quickly snapped out of that thought when fear coursed through my body like a title wave; I thought about the last thing that vampire had said to me before Jacob came _"I'll be back, please don't wait up for me" _

Was he just saying that to scare me because he was upset he didn't get what he wanted? Or was he going to be so determined that he would get what he wanted from me at any cost? I had to shake that thought away, I couldn't live in this much fear I would go mad.

I looked back down at my hand interlocked with Jacob's; I fell slowly back into our little bubble not daring to cut the surface.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 Control

It was a long sleepless night, but thankfully Jacob wouldn't leave my side. Normally my father would never allow Jacob to stay the night but under these circumstances it was alright.

After I showed my parents what happened, it took about two hours to calm my father down. If it weren't for my mother talking to him in the other room; I believe my father would be out there now trying to find this mystery vampire and rip him to pieces.

If my mother could cry, I believe she would have at the very sight of my images. My whole family Grandpa Carlisle, Grandma Esme, Aunt Rosalie, Aunt Alice, Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett all rushed to the house. I begged them not to wake Nahuel because he shouldn't have to deal with this and because I didn't need any extra drama added to my day by him and Jacob being in the same room.

Everyone was trying to figure out who this vampire was and where this vampire came from. My description was not that good; his features were buried in the darkness of the night. When my father was finally calm, my uncle Emmett was not helping the matter at all. Pumping my fathers head up with comments like "It doesn't matter who the hell he is, lets go out there and get him" and "We are wasting time with family meetings when we could be killing this bastard right now" My Aunt Rosalie had to give him the evil eye and a few hard nudges to the ribs to shut him up before my father decided to listen to my uncles impulses.

After about 7 hours of conversation my extended family finally left. And I laid awake in my room with Jacob right there by my side.

"You can sleep" Jacob said, his voice raspy he obviously fighting sleep himself.

"I can't" I answered sleepily

"Nessie, nothing is going to happen to you…not with me here"

"It's not that Jake" I interrupted "I just want to sit here and hold on to every second I'm here with you"

Jacob sat up, supporting his weight on his elbow. He looked confused.

"Jake, I'm sorry" I said finally. He went to object but I wouldn't allow him to "No, just listen"

I sat up, my back against my bed board.

"Today, I acted so childish, and I was ready to try and put up a fight against imprinting, over something that happened over 8 years ago"

Jacob sat up completely this time resting his back against my bed board as well.

"When that vampire was going to…" I couldn't say the words and I felt Jacob tense next to me "You were the only person I could think about…you were the only person I could see" Jacob brushed his finger gently across my cheek.

"Don't cry Nessie" Jacob whispered. I wasn't aware that I had begun to cry.

"I just…I love you Jacob and no matter how childish I may act or what I might say when I'm mad…please never forget that I love you in away words cant express" The tears were flowing heavily now. It seemed as if all my stress from this long tiring day had finally took its toll on me.

Everything that had happened today, everything that had almost happened today was finally starting to manifest itself in my emotions. I started shaking slightly; I couldn't believe how heavily I was weighed down with grief, love, hate, fear, happiness, and regret all in one big ball in the middle of my chest.

My silent cry turned into a slow crescendo of weeping. The force of emotion was so strong I couldn't control it.

"Ness…Ness…Shhh, its ok…Shhh everything is going to be ok" Jacob said as he held me rocking me back and forth.

"I am here and I am never leaving your side. I promise."

I couldn't respond I was lost in a sea of sorrow, cowering into his chest.

"I love you so much Renesmee"

"I know Jake…I know" I buried my face in his neck as my crying calmed but only slightly did it cease.

I kissed him on his neck once, then again closer to his jaw line. I felt Jacob stiffen slightly but he did not say anything he didn't move either.

I kissed him on his cheek a few times before shifting my weight until I was angled almost above him.

"Nessie…"

"Shhh" I interrupted him placing one finger over his lips.

I continued to kiss his face softly, his eyes, his nose, his chin I was going to save his beautiful lips for last.

"We can't" he said weakly and regretfully.

I quieted him by finally kissing his lips softly

I savored the kiss, at first he was reluctant but finally he kissed me with as much vigor as I had.

I shifted my body again until I was completely on top of him supporting my weight with my hands and legs on either side him. He did not move.

Our kisses were soft and delicate, tender full of pure love. I grabbed Jacobs face with both of my hands, throwing everything into this kiss.

It became eager and intense, Jacob who hadn't moved his hands from his sides the whole time; finally grabbed my hips as our kiss grew stronger and wilder.

Jacobs's hands were gently in my hair, softly caressing my back and my thighs but he still felt so guarded.

"It's ok, Jake…I promise, its ok" I whispered breathlessly my lips still pressed against his. "I need you Jake…please"

Suddenly I was flipped on my back and Jacob was on top of me kissing me aggressively, a low growl coming from his chest. My heart sped. I clawed his back in angst and anticipation, I could feel his shirt shredding underneath my finger nails. In one quick motion Jacob ripped his shirt off throwing what was left of it to the floor.

He started kissing my neck and my chest, then back to my lips again. I was breathing uncontrollably. I unsteadily went for the draw strings of his cargo shorts, preparing for him to pull my hand away and stop me like he had earlier today but to my surprise he didn't stop me.

Nerves were starting to take over my body.

As my thoughts fluttered through my head, Jacob was unbuttoning my shirt, and then his hands were behind my back unlatching my bra. If history repeats itself he should be calling it quits right about now.

But he didn't, my shirt and bra were on the floor before I could finish my thought process. Jacob kissed my chest, my breast exposed as his hand reached for the button on my jeans.

I knew my face was flushed red. This was it; Jacob and I were going to do this. Right now, right here, in my room, in my house… with my parents wide awake and fully alert downstairs.

"Stop" I said breathlessly and unconvincingly

"Mmm…?" Jacobs's voice muffled as he buried his face into my neck kissing me intensely as he unzipped my jeans and then slid his own cargo shorts off.

"Jake stop…we can't" my breathing hitching as I felt his warm hand slide to the inside of my jeans caressing my hips as he slowly slid my jeans down and then completely off. The heat of his body pressed against mine; made me quiver in an unadulterated way saturated with pleasure. Maybe we shouldn't stop…

Right, we should keep going.

I tangled my hands in his hair, wrapping my pant less legs around his waist gripping him closer to myself…I melted feeling him so close to me, I wanted us to be connected right at that moment, I needed him almost in a animalistic way. Then my mind drifted again. My parents are literally right down stairs, with heightened vampire senses. This isn't smart.

"Jake" I said again, not wanting to listen to my own voice, my mind saying one thing but my body acting and doing another. My objection wasn't believable and part of me hoped he'd ignore it.

Jacob stopped lifting his head from my neck and took in a deep breath of air. He turned over to his back with his hands resting on top of his head. His eyes were closed.

"I'm so sorry Jake; I know that was completely my fault. I just can't… not with them down stairs…please don't be mad at me"

"Nessie I'm not mad" he breathed "I'm not mad at… _you_ at least, I'm mad at myself"

He spoke, his eyes still closed.

"I don't know what I was thinking, I lost control"

"Jake it takes two people to…"

"Please, no sorry metaphors or clichés, I should have more control. It's like being with you is harder and harder each second"

"I'm sorry"

"Ness, stop apologizing. Please"

He sounded frustrated and I couldn't help but feel guilty. This was my fault whether he let me apologize for it or not.

"I think I should go get some fresh air"

"No!" I blurted out louder than I expected "You just promised you wouldn't leave, please don't go…please" It wasn't like me to beg but it also wasn't like me to be in love. I wanted Jacob with me every second of the day. And to night of all nights was especially important. He couldn't leave, unless I was going with him.

"Ok, Ness…I'm not going anywhere" he said as he wrapped his arm around me holding me tight against his body. "You know…maybe you should go put some clothes on before your dad comes in here and we have a whole new set of problems to deal with"

I jumped up and threw on a white tank top and pajama bottoms, Jake put his cargo shorts back on while I threw his shredded shirt in my closet as I grabbed him one of his shirts he'd left in my room over the years. I immediately nestled right back into Jacobs arms.

"You know my dad really must be losing it or going crazy about this vampire…for him to let you stay in here? It still shocks me" I said trying to sound teasing but the mention of this vampire that nearly raped and killed me made my body tense. I felt Jacob tense as well.

"Yea, we should take advantage of your father's lack of concentration" Jacob smiled.

"I think we already did" I said. I wanted it to come out as a joke but it came out as regret.

Jacobs smile vanished and he was now serious.

"We can do what ever you want when you are ready"

I was shocked.

"Jake are you sure, I mean…the order…"

"No, none of this is worth you being unhappy" he said "You're an adult, I'm an adult we can go as slow or as fast as you want…but just know its up to you Ness"

I looked at him in disbelief.

"It's not up to me, your father or your mother" he kissed my forehead "Just be happy"

I smiled and pecked him on the lips.

"Your just saying that because, you want some…such a perv" I joked.

Jacob laughed so loud it bellowed. "I'm the perv? Would you mind tying my draw string back up you nymphomaniac?"

I punched him as hard as I could multiple times until he jumped up and picked me up playfully body slamming my back on my bed. I put him in a head lock before he flipped me over slamming my back onto the bed again.

"Is that all you got?" I egged him on breathlessly

With a devilish smirk on his face he jumped on top of me pinning both of my arms above my head to the bed.

"Say uncle" he ordered humorously

"Never…!" I said defiantly, trying with much difficulty not to laugh

"Say it or this won't end pretty"

"You don't scare me dog boy!" I laughed.

"Ok you half bread, you went too far" he exclaimed jokingly. Then there were three very loud thuds on my door.

"Come in" I said automatically still laughing hysterically. My mother flung the door open and her mouth fell to the floor. Before I could ask her what was wrong, I realized why she was in shock.

I was so carried away with having fun with Jacob that I didn't realize what this might look like to her or to anybody that would have come in this room. I was on my bed and my hair in disarray, Jacob on top of me, shirtless-he hadn't put on the shirt I got him from my closet yet- with his hands restraining my arms above my head.

"Mom…it's not what it looks like" I said as Jacob released me jumping up from my bed.

"How is this not what it looks like Renesmee? Jacob? I can't believe you I trusted you…more importantly Edward trusted you…this is how you respect that trust?"

I'd never seen my mother this upset before.

"No, mom don't be mad at Jacob and it's not what you think…we were wrestling"

She looked at me obviously not believing a word I was saying.

Before I could control what I was saying the words fell from my lips uncontrollably. "Mom please hold my hand; I can show you" what was I thinking? I have had bad luck all day with controlling my thoughts. Even though Jacob and I were truly wrestling…_then_, what if I accidentally showed her what almost happened ten minutes before or the conversation Jacob and I had before we started wrestling.

My mom looked at my extended hand and then looked at Jacob before speaking.

"Okay, I believe you" she moved in closer "Sorry Jacob"

Jacob looked surprised. He was so cute, but I couldn't focus on that now.

"Bella no prob" Jacob said.

"Renesmee, Nahuel is down stairs" my mom said, still some reminisce of caution in her eyes.

I didn't need to look at Jacob to know that he was scowling and probably visibly overheating.

"He's here? Does he know what happened?"

"Yes and he wants to talk to you about it, he said it's very important" she looked confused, her expression probably mirroring my expression.

"What the hell does he need to talk to you about? He has nothing to do with this" Jacob growled through his teeth. I wasn't sure if he meant the question rhetorically or if he wanted me to respond. But I didn't, I just looked at my mom.

"Ok, well did dad read his mind?" I said ignoring Jacob all together

"No, he left" she said slightly confused as she stared at Jacob. She was obviously wondering why Jacob was about to have an aneurism.

"He left! He didn't go…" my mother interrupted me before I could finish

"No, no…he went to the main house, he is determined to figure this out tonight" she sounded almost exhausted if such a thing were possible for vampires.

"Ok, can you please tell Nahuel I'll be down in a minute" I said, I still hadn't made eye contact with Jacob.

My mom shook her head in agreement and was out of the room before I could blink.

I stood there facing the door, my back towards Jacob still forfeiting eye contact. After this long never ending day I just wanted it to be over. If Nahuel had some information that could help us with this mystery vampire, then we should listen. Even Jacob wouldn't be as stubborn as to ignore any information that could keep us all safe.

"Jake" I said, as I turned around. But he did not meet my eyes. He just stood there motionless and glowering at the door. I didn't want to argue and I didn't want to hear him speak when he was this mad. This was the Jacob I didn't like; this wasn't the Jacob who had full custody of my heart. This Jacob was cold and tempered not the warm and patient one who'd been sitting on my bed just a short while ago.

"Ok" I said softly. I turned around and walked out of my room, leaving Jacob behind to cool off.

I could see Nahuel sitting on the couch from the top of the steps.

"Hey" I said as I walked down the steps taking my time, Jacob still in the back of my mind.

"Are you ok" he said nervously as he stood up to hug me. I hugged him back guardedly which made the hug uncomfortable. My mom noticed and looked at me in a curious way. I ignored her and sat on the couch, she concentrated on my face a while longer then walked out of the room.

"I'm fine…thanks" I said as he sat down beside me.

He didn't speak and I could tell he had something on his mind but was struggling to find the words.

"I told them not to tell you" I said looking at my hands.

"Why would you do that?" he said with an edge to his voice like he was upset.

"Because, you're our guest and this is your… _vacation_" I reran the sentence over again and realized I didn't know if he were on vacation. I had no clue why he was here at all. Nahuel had to have noticed how I slowed my speaking over that last word, because his body stiffened and his eyes shot to the ground quickly. He knew he'd never told us why he was here.

"Wait…Nahuel why are you here?" I asked skeptically

"To check on you, to see if you're ok"

"No…no that's not what I meant…why are you here in Forks?"

Nahuel looked nervous, which in turn made me nervous. What was he hiding? Before he could answer a voice boomed from the top of the steps.

"I know exactly why he's here"

I spun around to see Jacob standing at the top of the steps; he looked more upset than he was when I left my room. Nahuel and I both jumped up.

"You think it's a coincidence that the very day he comes here, your almost attacked" Jacob spat out as he had already came down the steps and grabbed my arm shifting me behind him so that he was directly between Nahuel and I.

Jacob was taking this jealousy thing to a whole new level. I couldn't believe that he would think Nahuel knew something about the vampire that tried to attack me.

"Jacob!" I said in shock. "Are you crazy? What…"

I didn't finish my sentence when I noticed my mother was back in the room. Her face confused as was mine.

"This is crazy, I'm sorry …" I said looking Nahuel in his eyes.

"No Nessie… he is right" Nahuel interrupted. "It's not a coincidence"

It was like someone ran a bull dozer over my body. My mouth fell to the floor; I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Nahuel had something to do with my almost attack? But it couldn't be, why?

Before I could fathom what was happening I was yanked out of the room so quickly I was dizzied and confused.

Trying to adjust to where I'd been thrown; I heard this deep growl that shook the house and then a loud crashing sound. I quickly recognized it was Jacob, he'd phased. My heart sped, I was scared for Jacob I didn't want him to fight but it was too late now.

Before I could gather my thoughts I was yanked again with the same speed as before but only this time did I recognize that it was my mother that was pulling me along.

"Mom…?" I said scared and worried.

"We're going to the main house" she said quickly. "I've already called your father he is seconds away" her voice panicked and distant.

We were at the back door when my father and uncles busted through our back door. My fathers face was that of a killer, I knew Nahuel had no chance against the wrath of my father if Nahuel survived Jacobs's wrath somehow.

Everything was moving so quickly I didn't have time to adjust to what was going on. Slowly reality set in that someone who'd I thought was a friend quickly turned into an enemy. Tears boiled in my eyes.

I heard low vibrating growls that were most obviously my father and uncles and a loud crash, and then the sound of shattered glass.

I looked at my mother, but she did not look back at me she was focused on the door frame of our living room.

Then I heard nothing but complete silence.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 Favor

A part of me wanted to go into the living room and see what was happening but I didn't dare. Even if I did, I knew my mother would just yank me back. At the thought of my mother I looked at her, her face still tense and focused. I came to the conclusion that she was likely shielding everyone. I couldn't see why, there was no chance Nahuel had a chance of surviving my dad, Jacob and my uncles.

"Wait" I heard my father say firmly.

This order was followed by a loud growl that was obviously Jacob.

"Jacob, outside. Now" my father sounded like a drill Sergeant. If it were not for these strenuous circumstances this would have been funny, well to me at least. It was almost like my father was yelling at the dog for having made an accident on the carpet and ordering him to go outside like any family would to their house pet.

There was another low menacing growl obviously Jacob objecting to my father's demand.

"Until you calm down" my father continued

There was silence for a moment and then I heard the front door slam open. In the back of my mind I was wondering how Jacob managed to fit in our door frame in his wolf form but there were many other very important things I needed to be focused on at the moment.

"Yes, Bella but I think we need to give Nahuel a moment to explain" my father sounded calm which was a far cry from how he'd looked when he'd first crashed into the back door just moments before. Obviously my father read Nahuel's mind or his plead for help.

I was right my mother had been shielding him. I'm only assuming her unspoken questions were 'is everything ok? What's going on?' These are the very questions I would like to ask.

My mother grabbed my hand protectively as we -slower than human pace- rounded the corner into our living room. I could not believe my eyes.

The shelves were disheveled, books scattered on the hard wood floor, the mirror that took up more than half of our wall was completely gone the only evidence that there had ever been a mirror there at all was the one million reflecting like crystals shimmering on the floor-this was obviously the shattering glass sound I heard- and the frame to our front door was cracked a piece of wood dangling from its edge. I guess that answered my question as to how Jacob got out of our door in his wolf form.

And lastly as my eyes finished scoping out the damage of the room I saw Nahuel standing there completely unharmed but with the look of shock, fear and thankfulness all lumped up into one unidentified emotion. I quickly turned my head away not wanting to make eye contact for obvious reasons.

I was so nervous, I trusted my father to the fullest depths but Nahuel-a man who just admitted to having something to do with my almost attack- was standing in our living room. Why do we care what he has to say?

"I don't understand Edward, what is going on?" my mother said. She still had my hand gripped firmly; slightly angling me behind her defensively.

"Joham was Nessie's attacker" my father spat the words out as if every syllable could shoot venom.

Joham…? It took me all but one second to place where I'd heard that name before. I'd first heard that name years ago in the clearing when Alice and Jasper had introduced us and the Volturi to Nahuel, Kachiri and Huilen. I remember it clearly Caius asked Nahuel what his fathers name was and he simply answered Joham.

I remember them saying Joham thought of himself as a scientist that he thinks he is creating a new super species. By doing this he would rape mortal women and they would bare his child only for him to leave them to die and ultimately be killed by their half mortal half immortal babies during child birth, like I'd killed Bella.

I grimaced at the thought, but then slowly reality cut back to the surface. Nahuel had nothing to do with my attack. It was his father the infamous Joham who'd almost raped and probably would have killed me.

The twinge of guilt started to boil over as I realized Nahuel had been literally seconds away from his painful revengeful death, under misguided information. In the back of my mind I couldn't help but wonder why Nahuel didn't just out right say the truth from the beginning and save all of this confusion that almost cost him his life?

"Joham" my mother said releasing my hand "What…how does…when…"

Even immortality could not excuse my mother from stuttering occasionally.

"I'd think it's best if he'd explain himself" my father gestured towards Nahuel. The room was still; both of my uncles standing in the corner. I couldn't hear Jacob outside anymore, in the back of my mind I wondered where he ran to. He promised he would stay, I know circumstances change but a promise is a promise. Promises didn't come with a caution sticker on the back that said 'only valid when situations stay leveled with know boost in activity.'

I hadn't said a word, and I realized it wasn't because I didn't want to it was because I couldn't. I've always found it easier to show everyone how I was feeling versus verbalizing it. I grabbed my mothers hand again and showed her the questions I wanted answered. I was sure these were the same questions she had.

She nodded ever so slightly I'm sure only I could have seen. We sat down on the couch as Nahuel slowly walked to the chair across from us. My father and uncles remained standing.

"So…remembering how your relationship was with your father the last time you were here, I'm guessing you two did not travel together" my mother sounded so formal, if I hadn't been so nervous and curious I probably would have laughed. I could see in the corner of my eyes the trace of a smirk on my fathers face. He was obviously enjoying whatever act my mother was putting on as was I.

"Your guessing is correct" Nahuel took in a deep breath then turned to me "I'm so sorry, I should have been up front with you sooner, it's just that…" Nahuel paused. I heard a low growl come from the base of my father's throat.

Nahuel looked at him suddenly "I'm sorry" he said impishly, I'm only assuming Nahuel must have thought of something that my father generally wouldn't want to hear about his daughter. He turned back to me. "Nessie it's just that, I didn't think I would… _like_ you as much as I do, I didn't think bringing up the fact that my father could possibly be here would help my case" he barely finished his sentence before being interrupted by Jacobs booming voice in the front door.

"So, leaving her to get raped and killed was better for your case?" Jacob's voice seething with disregard and hatred, my mother and I flinched at the words Jacob spat out. I could see my father didn't like the detailed wording either his face was set in a low scowl only vaguely mirroring how he'd looked earlier.

Nahuel stood up facing Jacob, Jacob was about a good 6 or 7 inches taller than Nahuel.

"I understand why you are upset but as Edward said, I think its best I explained this myself…without any interruption"

Jacob looked as if he could rip Nahuel's head off with one clean swipe. Jacob was preparing to say something but I couldn't run the chance of this turning into another brawl or almost brawl or whatever that could possibly make Jacob phase again.

"Jake" I said finally speaking. I looked in his eyes, trying to plead with him to calm down I watched as the cold tempered Jacob –the one I was not a fan of- slowly but surely turned into my warm patient Jacob that had my heart openly and willingly on puppeteer strings. Jacob nodded his head slightly and walked inside walking past my father and uncles -not acknowledging Nahuel- and sat on the bottom of the steps.

"He is right…you not telling me almost got me…" I couldn't finish my sentence it was too hard to say and my voice didn't sound like mine. It was weak and light too soft too low. As I was examining my very weird voice I realized this was the longest day of my life. I couldn't picture not being able to sleep like the rest of my vampire family. This day had to end, didn't it? If only five minutes of sleep were the cure than so be it; but my body was exhausted every inch of my body was exhausted.

Childishly and inappropriately-looking at the situation- I wished the mirror was still on the wall, I would give anything to see how miserable I probably looked at this moment. It felt like I'd been up for days. I know it's been at least 24 hours of no sleep topped with my events I should win some type of stamina award.

"Yes, Nessie" he breathed trying to put the words just right "I knew my father was searching" he looked ashamed. He obviously meant his father was searching for girls to rape and impregnate and kill but why here in Forks of all places?

"I got word from my sister that he was in America and that he wanted to try something… _new_"

"Something new?" my mother asked intensely.

"Yes he wanted to search for new…_different _types of woman to bread with I suppose, then he got wind of the fact that the infamous Cullen family lived here in Washington and wanted to see this 'miracle' family for himself"

My mother tightened her grip on my hand.

"As soon as I found out, I came here to tell you, I swear… but then I was told he was in Africa for reasons unknown to me, but that he would be there for a while……I had no clue he was still here and I had every intention of telling you my first reasons for coming here I just didn't know it would have to be this soon"

"He came here specifically for Renesmee…" I couldn't tell if this were a question or a statement; my mother's voice was almost dark and very heavy at the same time I saw my father stiffen.

I didn't need to hear Nahuel's response. I knew the answer already. This wasn't just a coincidence that I'd happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time but Joham wanted me and that girl was actually the one who'd been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Joham wanted to bread with me, try and make some supernatural three fourths vampire baby.

My heart fell to my stomach and I felt like the room was spinning, I wondered if it were possible for a half vampire to faint. I tried to move by lips, but words failed me, I wanted to reach for my mother and show her how I was feeling but I was too weak everything was fogged. _Everything_… the voices, the faces, the cold touches and then the one scorching touch it was all a dizzying blur of confusion before everything faded to black.

**Chapter 6 Part II**

Where ever I was; it was quiet, only the soft sounds of the humming birds buzzing outside were evident.

I tried to open my eyes but it felt like they were super glued shut. They were too heavy to open. I just laid there, wanting to turn or roll over but I didn't feel like I was capable of any movement.

I gave opening my eyes one more shot; they fluttered open with a sense of confusion. There was a low grey haze of clouds that fogged my already enhanced vision; slowly I realized where I was.

My room.

"There she is" The tired husky voice said next to me. With much effort I slowly turned my head to see Jacob leaning on the edge of my bed faced towards me with a weak yet gleeful smile forming from his lips.

"Jake…? Wh…What happened?" My words were slow and slightly slurred as I tried to remember how to move my lips and have sound come out at the same time.

"You passed out" he said blankly, and to my eyes I could have sworn I saw a glint of humor in his eyes.

"Whatever Jake…seriously, what happened?" my voice was low rough and raspy I didn't like sounding this way. I cleared my throat a few times while Jacob answered.

"Ness…seriously you fainted. You've been asleep for over 20 hrs. Carlisle has been over here monitoring you… making sure you were still alive" Yes, I was pretty sure I detected humor in his voice. I couldn't blame him, I always bragged about being so tough and strong and to see me faint like a dainty girl was probably very amusing for him.

"20 hrs…?" I was shocked and astonished. How could I have slept this long? It didn't seem possible to me. "Where are my parents?" I continued.

"Your Mom is downstairs, she is going to be really upset that you woke up and she wasn't by your side…She has been in here every second since we brought you up here" Jacob said conversationally.

"What made her go downstairs?"

"Charlie" he replied placidly. I nodded my head in understanding; but then realizing Jacob only answered one half of my question.

"And my dad…?" I asked as I rigidly moved to sit up. This was the first time I'd ever felt sore; I didn't think that was possible either.

Jacob didn't answer me, his face grew serious.

"Jake…what…?" As I looked into Jacob's face everything that transpired the last time I was conscience came flooding back to me like a Tsunami. Finding out Jacob imprinted me, seeing Nahuel, finding out about my mom and Jacob, almost kissing Nahuel, almost being raped and murdered, almost making love to Jacob, finding out that Nahuel's father was my attacker and it was not by coincidence but rather Joham-Nahuel's father- had a bull's eye sign on my forehead and was going to rape me to impregnate me.

"Please tell me my father isn't out looking for Joham! He can't!" I blurted out as I jumped off of my bed, the blood rushing too quickly causing my legs to buckle and my head to spin; I nearly fell to the floor. The only reason I didn't hit the floor was because Jacob jumped up and caught me. He gently placed me back on the bed.

"Ness, calm down…your father will be fine. Everything is going to be fine" the first thing I noticed was that Jacob did not deny that my father was out searching for Joham.

"What is he thinking?" tears started to stream down my cheek

"Ness…what are we supposed to do just let him roam around? And if he comes back…"

"We…?" I said surprised and angrily. What did he mean by "_we"? _Its bad enough that my dad left, lucky for him I was unconscious because there definitely would have been a fight, but did Jake actually think I was going to let him go out there and find some vampire who is centuries old which meant he was extremely strong?

"Ness, you can't be serious? He is not going to get near you again…no one in this is house or on the reservation is going to allow it. And the easiest thing to make sure that stays true is to kill him" Jacob was speaking through his clenched teeth on the last part of that sentence.

I felt my heart pounding in my head and limbs; I didn't want this to be some huge thing. Obviously it was, but I didn't want my family put in danger at the expense of me, I'd already put them through enough in my lifetime.

"Well where exactly is my dad?" my voice was very shaky.

Jacob repositioned himself on the bed so that he was sitting up directly next to me. He was obviously trying to buy time before he told me where my father was.

"He's in…"

"Renesmee you're awake!" My mother's voice rang loudly from my door interrupting Jacob. I smiled at her as she hugged and softly kissed me on top of my matted down hair. She sat on the opposite side of me on the edge of my bed across from Jacob.

"You had us so worried but Carlisle told us not to try and wake you…to let you get all the rest you needed" It was hard to escape my mothers perfect smile. It was nice to have this one moment of happiness and solace to escape from reality.

But as life serves you I had to face what was at hand. I'd quickly realized that I still didn't know where my father was and in the back of my mind I was guessing that I didn't want to know.

I placed my hand on the op of my mothers and returned her joyous smile; mine was a weaker mirrored version of her smile.

"Thanks mom…I know you never left my side…I love you"

"I love you to Renesmee" she grabbed my hand and gripped it tight

I then turned to Jacob, whose face was still locked in a serious manner. He knew I wouldn't forget that easily. With the better chance of getting the truth out I asked the question once more.

"Jake…you were about to tell me where my dad is?" knowing my mother so well I saw her dart a quick glance at Jacob. I turned to her and saw that her eyes looked saddened. Her eyes looked like she would cry if that were possible.

Slight panic coursed through my body and my impatience grew angry. I would not be the little girl who was always kept in the dark, like I'd been my whole life.

"Where is my father" I emphasized every word, with angry connotations behind each syllable. I was not looking at my mom or Jacob. I had my eyes fixed on my dorm frame. I felt that if I looked at my mother I would cry because of her expression and If I looked at Jacob I would just grow angrier because he would have that protective look in his eyes that to me; read "this is too much for you to handle now"

The room was quiet for a moment as I forfeited eye contact. I know it was obvious to both of them how fast my heart was pounding in my chest.

My mom repositioned herself placing both of her hands on top of my right hand. I finally looked at her and once again her eyes were sad and cold. Almost as if she were angry and regretful and longing. I prepared myself for anything.

"Renesmee" she breathed. Too quickly for human eyes she shot a look at Jacob then back to me "Your father is in Italy"

I looked at her confused. Then I figured I had been conked out for 20 hours Joham probably got word that my family was looking for him and ran off to Italy.

"Italy…well…Wh…?" I looked into the pain that struck across my mothers face when she said Italy and slowly comprehension grew wide and clear. My father wasn't in Italy chasing Joham; Joham was more than likely still right here in Forks waiting for the first opportunity to impregnate me. My father was in Italy with the Volturi.

"Why?" my voice screeched.

"He thinks that the Volturi are the only thing that can stop Joham" my mother's eyes were placid as if she objected to my father's idea as much as I did right now.

I looked at her; my eyes wide as she continued. "He believes Demitri can track him down"

"Mom, it doesn't make sense to me…the only favors the Volturi do are death wishes" I choked over the last words.

"Your father thinks he can persuade them" her voice was unconvincing and a little afraid; it seemed she didn't understand this as much as I didn't.

"Persuade them?"

I asked the question more to myself than I did to receive a response. My mind started boggling backward to a conversation I'd had with Grandpa Carlisle a few months after the Volturi came here to see if I was any danger.

Grandpa told me in this conversation that no one asks the Volturi for favors other than asking to die. If you asked for a favor that did not pertain to losing your life –if you can call one vampire dying at the hands of another vampire a life- there was only one other option that would lead them to help you. They called it an even trade.

My heart started racing at the thought of what my grandpa said his exact words were "The only thing the Volturi accept as a fair exchange between favors is if you are particularly gifted and would offer to join there guard for a discussed amount of time or until they felt your debt was paid"

I then remembered how badly the Volturi wanted my father, my mother, and my aunt Alice.

I felt like tears were going to start flowing. This didn't make sense to me. Too many questions and scenarios didn't add up. My father would never openly join the Volturi guard not even if he thought it would protect me. They stood for everything my family didn't believe in.

And my mother how could she let him go? Was she crazy? I would have expected her to put up a better fight? They'd only been apart one time and that was when she was a mortal how could she just sit there and watch him leave?

I realized that my mind was running on its own course. More than likely I was over reacting. My nerves have been really bad as of late I couldn't blame myself for thinking the worse.

I gathered myself before speaking; I wanted to make sure my voice was as steady as possible.

"I know about the Volturi favor code" I knew this couldn't be possible but I asked for reassurance anyways. "He didn't go to the Volturi to ask them to kill Joham and in exchange he would temporarily join there guard?" I was almost embarrassed to ask the question.

I expected to immediately hear Jacob say 'Man, Ness you really overreact' and I expected to hear my mother say 'Of course not sweetie, don't be silly'.

But instead my eyes met the painful glare of my mother's eyes; once again I knew tears would have been flowing down her icy cheeks if it were possible. And Jacob didn't say a word. It seemed as if everything stopped at that moment, I don't think I was capable of breathing.

It felt like the wind was knocked out of me, I felt the tremors ride up my spine as the only word I could produce breathlessly was…

"No"


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7 Broken Promise

"But…why…? How could you let him go?" I screeched through tears; I was so angry with my mother for allowing this, my heart literally felt pain.

"Renesmee you can't possibly think I…let…him go?" she struggled "I begged him to stay" my mother's voice was pained.

"It's crazy" I said as Jacob grabbed my hand.

My mother was quiet before she spoke softly again.

"Do you remember what I said to you a couple of days ago? I said is it crazy to follow your heart?"

I didn't know where she was going with this. I just nodded my head.

"How I'd made decisions because I loved you more than anything and that even though it might be crazy to someone else, I still did it because in my heart I knew it was the right thing?"

I nodded again.

"Well Renesmee when I was pleading with your father to stay, he told me that he loved you too much and the only thing he could do was this…for you… even if it's crazy. Your father and I have a strong love… a strong bond… but the most redeeming trait our love shares is the fact that we love you more than anything." She grabbed my hand again caressing it softly. "I couldn't be a hypocrite; when I was more than willing to give my life for you but when he wants to…" she breathed, struggling to say the words "…when he wants to do the same… I can't simply object."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, my father was going to risk everything by getting involved with the Volturi and my mother was ok with it because she risked everything when she was a human for me?

This was exactly what I meant by my existence; it ruined everything. I could see in my mother's eyes that this was the most painful thing she has ever gone through but she is going through it because of me. I didn't say a word I just stared at her tears falling recklessly down my cheeks.

"Renesmee and this is not set in stone" my mother said abruptly, as if she were trying to make herself believe her own words.

"What is not set in stone?" I said as I wiped a few tears from my cheek.

"Your father is going to argue that what Joham is doing is illegal, that impregnating these women could get the word out about vampires"

"After Aro met me and Nahuel I thought they decided that these types of children were ok?" I asked

"Yes, the ones who have been raised not to drink human blood but who knows what Joham could do; he could start a small army of human blood thirsty babies. That is what your father is going to argue"

"And if that argument doesn't work he is going to offer his servitude?" my voice cracked and my mother's face grew wary again.

"Well, he has another argument. The Volturi's biggest fear is the uncertainty of these children. Joham came here specifically for" she paused slightly "…you. No one knows what a vampire who is one fourth human and three fourths vampire would be capable of"

So my father was going to argue that they should hunt and kill Joham because if they don't he will impregnate me, which will produce a child of the unknown.

I wanted to see my fathers face so badly, I wanted to feel him kiss my forehead and say 'I love you sweetheart' I needed to hear his voice…I needed him here…with us; not with the Volturi a clan who once wanted me and my entire family dead. It didn't make sense. I was angry with my father, I wanted to yell at the top of my lungs but I knew it wouldn't do any good. I knew that he was there doing this for our family…doing this for me.

It was hard to even think that some vampire-some sadistic vampire- was out there waiting for the right moment to attack me. I looked at Jacob; he hadn't said a word in a long time. I knew just by looking in his eyes that nothing I said would stop him from hunting Joham.

I knew that life for all of us would be better if Joham were caught and killed, but I would not take any chances of Jacob getting hurt or…killed…because of me. I would gladly stand in front of Joham and die at his hands before I could ever let anything happen to Jacob or any of my family for that matter.

"It's ok Nessie, he is not going to get anywhere near you" Jacob said softly with an edge to his voice as he stood up to leave. He'd misread my facial expression. The look in my eyes wasn't fear for myself but fear for him and my family.

"Jake, you're not leaving this room" I said flatly as I stifled the last of my tears and tremors.

"Ness, I…"

"No, don't step one foot out of this room, the second you do I'm following right behind you" I interrupted.

"Seriously, Nessie Joham is…"

"…is my problem" I interrupted again. "Jake I've never been more serious in my life."

Jacob looked at me like I was crazy, and honestly in that moment I probably was, but that didn't matter now. I was unconscious when my father decided to pretty much put his life on the line for me; I am definitely not going to have Jacob do the same especially while I'm fully awake and aware.

"Nessie, this isn't a conversation we are having"

"You're right its not, I'm glad you understand"

"No…Nessie" Jacob corrected me "That's not what I meant, I mean that this is not a conversation…period…I'm not standing by while this blood suckers after you" Jacob said through clenched teeth, his anger blaring its ugly face through his eyes.

"You can get as mad as you want" he continued "but I'm not taking any chances. Case Closed."

I felt my heart speed up, I hated when anyone spoke to me like I was a child. I hated when anyone spoke to me about my life but didn't let me have a say in it. I could feel my face burning as I glared at Jacob angrily.

My mother was as still as a rock beside me. She was more than likely feeling awkward in this moment witnessing her daughter about to have a fight with her boyfriend.

"I'll leave you two, to discuss this" she said slowly guarding every word that left her mouth. She got up kissed my cheek, quickly glanced at Jacob and as quick as a blink she was gone.

"Jake, this case is _not_ closed" I spat back

"You're insane if you think, I'm going to actually talk to you about this" he said angrily as he walked towards the window.

I stood up, but this time slower, my case would be harder to argue if I were passed out on the floor.

"Listen to me, everything that is going on is because of me; now everyone I love is in danger and it's not fair… this is my problem" I walked towards him "If my father is in Italy risking everything so that the Volturi can deal with this…what makes you think you and your wolves can do any better?" I waited impatiently for his response.

"We are not going to sit here and let this family fight this battle alone, we are just as much a part of your life as anybody; we have no clue how many crazed half vampire half human babies Joham has running around waiting to attack" he argued back.

"It's my fault and it's my problem" I said again vehemently

"It is not your fault and it is everyone's problem" he growled

Jacob looked at me; he was highly upset-if that even describes the look on his face- that I wouldn't let this go. I knew that it made sense for my family to protect me; any family would protect the ones they loved. But I can't stand idle when I see the ones I love risking everything just to protect me.

It didn't make sense to Jacob and it probably wouldn't make sense to most; but…this…I could not allow.

"You promised" I blurted out after a few exaggerated seconds went by.

"What?" Jacob asked confused.

"You promised you wouldn't leave, you have to keep that promise"

Jacob shook his head a walked closer to me.

"Nessie, I'm sorry. But promises are null in void once your safety is at risk" Jacobs tone was a little lighter but still had that edge to it. He walked towards me and kissed my cheek. "Bye Ness, I'll see you later tonight" Jacob turned away from me to walk towards the window.

"Stop…!" I yelled my voice cracking still from the heavy sleep. Jacob kept walking ignoring my plea. I needed him to stop; I needed him to stay here with me. I physically needed someone…him… by my side.

"Jacob Black if you leave this room, don't you ever come back" the words flew from my lips unguardedly. He spun around his face painted with confusion and anger.

The words were not premeditated but they got his attention.

We glared at each other for a long while before he spoke.

"You don't mean that" Jacob said, it wasn't a question.

"I do. You promised to stay here. If you break that promise, how can I trust you?" I was completely off the cuff, with no direction in sight. Jacob's face was torn between anger, debate and shock, which probably mirrored my own face.

I didn't know what I was saying but the more I spoke the longer Jacob was standing here with me. I was really beginning to think that Jacob was right I was insane. Stubborn and most obviously border line selfish, but the more it ran through my mind the less I cared.

Subconsciously I knew I wasn't being logical but, I didn't stop.

"How can you trust me? I'm going out there to save you…and you can't trust me?" He yelled. "Damn it Renesmee what the hell is wrong with you?"

As loud as his voiced boomed I almost felt like curling into a ball. I didn't know what the hell was wrong with me. I knew it was a lost cause, but the only thing I did know was that I needed him to stay.

This ultimatum was obviously not working. I needed him to realize-even if it's just for tonight- that he could not leave me, that I needed him.

I slowly walked over to him. I grabbed his hand and stood there silent for a few minutes before I spoke.

"I trust you, Jake" I whispered barely audible. I wrapped both of my arms around Jacob's neck stretching with his full length as I pulled myself up on the tips of my toes. He stood motionless not helping me reach his face.

"I'm sorry I said that, you know I trust you" I said again an inaudible whisper. I pulled my self up without his help he didn't move as our eye contact became level with one another.

I kissed him softly on the lips, he did not reciprocate. I clung there like a rag doll as he stood like a statue. I kissed him again, not closing my eyes still holding the eye contact; I could see that his eyes were not as angry as they were but they were no where near a good mood.

"Please" I whispered my lips still touching his as I spoke.

"Please" I repeated. I felt his hands slowly grip around my back allowing me to relax my grip from around his neck slightly. He'd misunderstood my words. I wasn't begging him to kiss me back; I was begging him to stay.

I finally closed my eyes breaking our eye contact for the first time in minutes. I kissed him intensely with passion; he finally reciprocated. Our kiss grew into something more than any other kiss we'd had. The kisses before were passionate but something was missing in the other kisses that this one did not lack; this kiss was ferocious, angry mixed in with the passion.

I moaned against Jacob's lips, moving my hands to his hair; now that I was being fully supported by Jacob's arms. I hiked my legs up; wrapping them around his waist.

Finally we broke from the kiss coming up for air, he kissed my neck as he walked towards my bed still carrying me. Our lips locked again, before I felt the softness of my comforter crash into my back. Jacob was on top of me as we lay on my bed our lips never losing rhythm.

All I had on was a long T-shirt and underwear, my legs exposed as I felt Jacob's hot hand rub my inner thigh causing me to quiver. Jacob moved his lips from my lips to my cheek, from my cheek, to my neck.

"I knew I could make you stay, I knew you wouldn't break a promise" I said breathlessly. Then all too quickly Jacob was standing to his feet in the middle of my room. I sat up and looked at him puzzled.

"Wh…what's wrong…?" I panted

"That's what this is about? A promise…? You'd do anything to make me stay? Ness, I don't know what is wrong with you or what is going on in your head right now. But this…you…" he stopped talking

I rewound what I said and realized that's not what I meant…exactly. What had gotten into me? This was low, and I couldn't bare the fact that I'd hurt him, made him think I was taking advantage of him.

"Jake, I'm sorry I…"

"No, Ness…" he interrupted. "Save it, when you're ready to tell me what's really going on. I'll be here to listen"

"But Jake…" before I could finish my sentence he was gone. My heart felt hallow. It always hurt to be away from Jacob but right now was much worse than anything I had experienced in his absence.

I sat on my bed staring at the window Jacob had jumped out of, just thinking about all the things that had gone wrong. And all were because of me.

I kept repeating what Jacob said to me over and over again 'When you're ready to tell me what's going on. I'll be here to listen'

I was not myself; I'd never been that overbearing that stubborn in my entire life. I couldn't tell Jacob what was wrong until I figured it out for myself first. It was no secret that I needed him by my side and it is no secret that I love him with all of my heart but what I displayed just moments ago was embarrassing and regretful.

I let my mind wonder to the beginning of everything before all of the drama -that is my life- happened.

The quiet morning I spent in La Push with Jacob, when we were just friends, before any of the imprinting talk. Then the argument that turned into a nice conversation with my mother in the kitchen, then Jacob coming over sharing secrets that I didn't know about. Then Jacob finally telling me that he imprinted me, and finding out about his relationship with my mother, then running into Nahuel.

The thought of Nahuel sent uneasiness through my body. I thought about that almost kiss. How close I'd come to succumbing to temptation. I realized I wasn't upset with myself that I'd almost kissed him but that even afterwards I'd wished I did.

Something in the back of my mind wanted to see how far I could push imprinting, learn what the limits were. I didn't know why and couldn't understand why I could not rid this thought. All my uncertainties came rushing to the fore front, all the thoughts I'd suppressed.

I realized why I wanted…needed Jacob to stay with me. When I am with him I don't think about anything else. He is the only thing I see and need. When he is away my mind wonders about possibilities…about Nahuel, about what if imprinting was not a factor? Where would Jacob and I stand?

It was guilt…all guilt. Jacob didn't know about my almost kiss with Nahuel and it was eating away at me and I didn't realize it until Jacob was gone.

I was officially crazy. I was trying to question the love and nature of my relationship with Jacob that stemmed from imprinting. Discovering unanswered and undefined feelings for Nahuel -who is in all actuality a stranger- over just a couple days and I can't forget the fact that his father wants to rape and impregnate me.

My mind flashed to Joham's face-or what I could see of it- his cold hands on my skin his blazing red eyes piercing through the dark night. I shivered trying to block that image from my mind. Knowing that my father was with the Volturi because of Joham made my face feel burning hot, if I could I would like to kill Joham with my own two hands.

I snapped from that thought; I couldn't allow my self to think of my father, it hurt too badly.

"Can I come in?" I heard my mother say through the door.

"Of course"

She walked in slowly then stopped at the foot of my bed her face was concerned and surprised.

"Renesmee sweetie, what happened are you ok?" she asked as she sat on my bed beside me.

I didn't know what she meant -she more than likely heard Jacob yelling at me- until I sat up and saw my pillow drenched with my tears. I wondered what my face looked like.

"Oh, I'm fine" I lied as I hurriedly wiped away the last of the tears. It felt like I'd cried more these last few days than I did for my entire lifetime.

"Your not use to fighting with Jake" she said but it wasn't a question.

"I'm not crying because of Jake mom."

We just sat there staring at each other for a moment in complete silence before she spoke again.

"Your father…he is going to be fine" she said. But it sounded like she was trying to convince herself.

I didn't say a word; I honestly could not talk about my father saying the words always made something real. And this definitely could not be real. Just thinking about the way the Volturi regard human life and family and friends and love repulsed me. My father could not be apart of that.

All the problems in my life seemed like they were at war with each other; one problem trying to outshine the other causing me to feel weak, there was nothing more I wanted to do than just lie in my bed until everything just went away.

I was startled out of my thoughts when my mother's cell phone rang. She answered so quickly I barely saw her take it out of her jean pocket.

"Hey Alice" she said.

I could hear the murmuring of my Aunt Alice's bell like voice through the receiver but just barely.

My mothers face grew serious, I looked at her concerned.

"I'm fine Alice, just say it" my mothers voice was hard and cold very much the vampire. This frightened me; I sat completely up trying to focus as closely as I could to hear what Alice was saying.

I concentrated until finally after a long pause I heard Aunt Alice say in a strained voice.

"Bella, I had a vision…it's about Edward… and the Volturi"


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 I'm rubber, you're glue

It's been four days since I've been at La Push staying with Jacob and Billy. I'd much rather be home but at the age of 17 apparently I can't be there without an adult. I guess I could understand why my mother didn't trust Jacob and I to be alone together in that big house.

Before she -and pretty much my whole family except for Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rosalie- left she told me she knew what was going on in the room with Jacob and I-before he left abruptly- but that she trusted I would have enough respect for her to not let it go too far. Little did she know that was all Jacobs doing, I didn't tell her that though, I just nodded my head in embarrassment.

And I guess the fact that a sadistic vampire was after me didn't help my case to stay home alone either.

"Are you going to pout the whole time you're here or can we try to have some fun?" Jacob startled me as I stared out of his living room window.

I looked at him repulsively and rolled my eyes directing them back to the window; it was beginning to drizzle outside; the small pellets began to prick at the glass.

"Come on Ness, you might as well perk up, we don't know how long you are going to be here" he said as he walked closer to me. "You can't just…sit here all day"

"I can and I will. Go have all the fun you want, I don't need a baby sitter" I said snidely.

He didn't say anything but I could see the scowl on his face through the reflection in the window. My sour attitude over the last four days has been very intolerable but I was upset and he happened to be the only person around besides Billy most of the time so Jacob got the grunt of it.

"I'm not so sure about not needing a baby sitter; because you're actually acting like a huge baby right now" he said with slight humor in his voice, his face still serious.

We glowered at each for a moment before he spoke again.

"Look, I know your mad about a lot of things and I know you wish there were things you could do to…help… but Ness, sitting here moping isn't going to change anything either"

My face was already turned back towards the window the rain was pouring hard now, slapping at the glass at a rapid pace.

"Maybe it will" I mumbled very low under my breath, so low that Jacob wouldn't hear it, but I heard him exhale in annoyance and walk out of the room. I guess I didn't say it as low as I thought I had.

I was being very stubborn and I was being a drag to be around but what did Jacob expect? My whole family was out risking there lives for me and he and half the reservation were up all night prowling around as giant wolves trying to keep me safe, I couldn't understand how I deserved all of this…I didn't in fact.

Every time I think about my family and the Volturi a –now- so familiar aching pain pulsates through my entire body. It always causes me to switch my thought pattern to something way more trivial; for instance having petty non important arguments with Jacob.

I just stared at my cell phone sitting in the window pane waiting for it to ring as the rain crashed violently against glass.

**Chapter 8 Part II Edward POV: **Three Days prior

I could quite literally kill Alice at this point; walking into the hotel room seeing them all sitting there wide eyed waiting for me to speak. I had to flush out all of their thoughts and wonders and apprehensions so I could focus on the most immovable presence in the room.

This had been the longest time I'd spent away from Bella since her mortal years when I had –so selfishly; unbeknown to myself- left her; thinking it would protect her… I was miserably wrong.

Even though it has only been –barely- three days since I saw her last; each second seemed to take on a life of its own, almost seeming like every one second was equivalent to ten hours.

I so badly wanted this hotel suite to be rid of Alice, Jasper, Carlisle and Esme so I could have this moment to breathe her in, to touch her, to kiss her…

"Edward" hearing Bella say my name always reminded me of how truly undeserving I was to have her in my life… or in my existence for a better term. Her voice sounded eager yet nervous as if she didn't know how I would react to her being here. How silly of her to ever think I would be disappointed to see her face, even though her being here in Italy was the last thing I wanted.

Interrupting my train of thought, I felt her crash into me, wrapping her arms violently around my neck. I soaked in her fragrance; I then heard her say 'I love you' realizing she'd put her shield up so that I could read her thoughts.

"I love you too" I whispered in her hair so low that if we were not in a room full of vampires it would have been completely inaudible to everyone but her.

'What are you thinking? Did you really think I would let you…' her thought was interrupted by Carlisle; who was speaking aloud she dropped her shield

"My son, I know you did not expect to see us here"

"No… I did not" I said through my teeth quickly turning my head to glare at Alice.

She just looked at me with no remorse or regret on her face; her thoughts were clouds of 'what was I suppose to do?' and 'if it had been Bella you would have wanted to know… hypocrite'. I grimaced and rolled my eyes. My focus was on what Carlisle was saying and my beautiful wife in my arms.

"I know you are upset but what Alice saw is completely unacceptable"

"I didn't make any decisions yet" I said flatly

"Yes, but you haven't made any decisions to oppose this one" Alice said jumping off of the bed to walk towards Jasper. I just glowered at her; she shrugged and thought 'Well it's true'

"Edward, the Volturi are in a position to take advantage of…"

"I know" I interrupted Carlisle "But I am not going to let Joham and whatever army he may have anywhere near my daughter or anyone else in this family"

I quickly realized that if everyone was here prying in my personal affairs then…

"Where is Nessie?"

"She's at La Push" Bella said sheepishly. I know Jacob is my wife's best friend but to leave a teenage girl at her boy friends house unattended was positively ridiculous.

"Billy is there and Charlie is checking in periodically throughout the days" she said too quickly perceptibly reading my facial expression.

"And Emmett and Rosalie stayed behind to keep an eye on things as well Edward" Esme interjected.

I nodded. Everything was quiet as I listened to the murmurings of their thoughts. They all wanted me to speak. They all wanted to hear my reasons; for a decision that I hadn't made yet. Bella obviously ordered Alice to snoop into my future but it was to be expected.

"Don't you all think it would have been more prudent to stay behind just in case Joham…?" Alice interrupted my observation.

"Joham is back in Africa" Alice said swiftly

"Isn't that what we thought last time" I said; very much aggravated

"Last time, Edward… I didn't know what I was looking for. Nahuel had just heard that information from his sister…I on the other hand saw it!" she gloated.

"I bet you did" I said venomously, I felt Bella tighten her grip around my waist, she put her shield up briefly to allow me to read her thoughts 'stop it…be nice… she is only helping' then her shield was dropped.

I sighed. Without making eye contact with anyone; I spoke.

"I suppose you are waiting for an explanation"

Their thoughts were scattered with 'yes' 'absolutely' 'obviously' the last thought was without a doubt Alice's. I sighed again and finally looked forward to see their eyes piercing through me.

"Aro was completely willing to lend us their services; solely based on the fact they had also obtained information from other vampires that Joham was recklessly creating these half immortal children" as I spoke I grabbed Bella's arms from around my waist and gently held her hand.

"Everything was set in stone until Jane…" I said her name as if it were an explicit "…came in, reminding Aro that it is proto-call to read everyone's thoughts just incase they have something up their sleeve. Aro obliged to Jane's query and read my thoughts. Once he knew I was willing to give pretty much anything for the hunting of Joham; he changed his tune"

I was interrupted by an especially audible sigh from Alice. Everyone looked at her; I'd already read her mind but she spoke a loud for everyone else's benefit.

"What…? I've already heard…and seen this part" she defended. I scowled at her until I felt Bella tighten her grip around my hand. I looked down at her only to see her wide eyes piercing up towards me. I continued…

"As I was saying" I said harshly directing it towards Alice "Aro decided he wanted my services now and that they would send Demitri and Felix to find Joham accordingly"

I'd left out the part about… how… they were going to use my services, but they all knew or else they wouldn't be here.

The Volturi wanted me to read the minds of innocent humans and lure them into there quarters. At night they wanted me to use my speed to catch any of the people who tried to run or speed away in their cars like some sadistic cat and mouse game; the mouse obviously never having a chance. It was revolting but this was the option I was given. I don't think I have any limits to how far I would go to protect my daughter and my family.

This was not who I was and this decision battled with whatever 'conscience' I have as a vampire but I would not let Joham destroy my family.

"I don't see why it was necessary for all of you to be here" I interrupted their thoughts "A simple phone call would have sufficed"

"Like you would have answered" Alice said lowly. I ignored her.

"You all should be with Nessie" I continued

"Edward, we need to show Aro that we are a united front that we will not stand by while they try to diminish the morals that we have built over the years" Carlisle said. "They are only doing this because they feel they can slowly dismantle our growing family but he can't and he won't. I can't allow it." Carlisle was intense and very sure of every word that escaped.

I knew that everything he was saying was true, but Joham would be put to a stop. It would be nothing for me to go and find this Joham and kill him myself but I know of his history I know of how powerful he has become over the last decade; if we just simply killed him he would have hundreds maybe thousands of half immortal followers ready to take his rank.

I couldn't chance having my family at risk; we needed to find where he kept these children and they needed to be destroyed.

"Edward, I think that we should get our friends and I know the wolves will…" Bella began to say but I did not let her continue.

"No, we are no match for thousands of untrained half immortal children. Joham tries to hide behind the swagger but he is terrified of the Volturi, therefore they are our only sure hope we have of eliminating all of them" I was going to go on but Bella's face was shocked.

"Th…thousands?" she whispered. I quickly realized that I hadn't shared all the information I'd obtained. All of their thoughts were in shock. All accept for Alice.

"What, Alice you didn't say anything?" I directed this comment sarcastically towards her.

"No, I figured this was something you should share" firing just as much sarcasm back at me.

"What else do you know Edward?" Bella was visibly upset that I hadn't shared everything with her.

"I know that if we have any chance of destroying all of them, that we need Demitri, Jane and Alec especially…it's our only option"

The room was quiet, even their thoughts were contemplative; they were beginning to realize that we didn't have many options if we were going to stop Joham and his half immortal children.

Going to the Volturi was the last thing I wanted to do; I knew about the favor code but I had to take that chance, I had to hope that they would simply abide by the law and demolish Joham and his half immortal children. But I should have known the Volturi would stop at nothing to seize what they have sought after for decades.

"What does this mean?" Esme asked a loud

"It means…I have a decision to make" I answered complacently.

Bella released my hand and faced towards me.

"No" she said angrily. I looked at her befuddled; I went to ask her what she meant but she wouldn't let me begin.

"This cannot happen. You're not staying here, you're not doing this" she urged vehemently.

"Bella…"

"No, Edward you can't honestly think…" she interrupted.

"There is a bigger picture at hand Bella, I can't just…"

"Fine, you're right. I am staying too" she said very certain of her self

"Don't be silly, I won't let…"

"So are these double standards Edward?" she quizzed. "Aro wants my abilities just as badly; if not more than he wants yours. I'm sure he wouldn't object"

"Bella you are being absurd"

"And your not…?"

We didn't speak we just glared at each; neither one of us willing to budge from our argument. She was the most stubborn person I'd ever known; it was always so frustrating to make her see logic when she was this adamant.

"Bella" I breathed before continuing "Who will stay with Nessie" I asked plainly trying with difficulty to erase the anger from my voice.

"Temporarily" she stated "I wouldn't leave her behind indefinitely, you know that" she said this as if she were offended. "But you and I both know that Jacob and his pack are just as capable of protecting her as we are"

Before I could counter my eyes flitted to Alice, her mouth slowly gaping. I was seeing what she was seeing at that moment and I froze.

"What…?" Bella asked confused she always knew when Alice and I were communicating.

"Alice…?" she asked as she looked in her direction. I could hear the murmurings of everyone's thoughts but I had to tune them out to focus on what Alice had just seen.

"Alice, what is it?" Jasper demanded. When her vision was complete she finally spoke.

"Joham" she said looking at me.

"What…? What about Joham?" Bella asked fearfully.

"He's planning on coming back…and he is not alone. He knows we are here trying to involve the Volturi." The room was silent as she continued "He plans to fight back"

"Fight back…? Does he not realize he is no match for the Volturi?" Jasper asked skeptically.

"He isn't alone" Alice repeated morosely.

"Yes, he is coming here with his children, how many?" Carlisle asked.

"I can't be sure…but when I say he isn't alone, I mean he has someone with him" Alice looked confused as if she were trying to sift through a difficult memory "It isn't clear but she is a very powerful vampire, incredibly strong and a very new vampire, but she has amazing restraint, sort of like how you were Bella when you first were changed. Her ability outshines any of the abilities the Volturi guard posses"

"What is her power?" Esme asked her voice low and nervous.

"She can reverse any power used on her or anyone near her" Alice shook her head "It's like…it's like she is a repellent or something; like that saying 'I'm rubber you're glue' but in her case it isn't the words that bounce off and stick to you; it's the pain"

"When…?" I growled angrily.

"Two weeks, I'm sure of it" Alice answered confidently.

I looked at Bella, her face was riddled in pain and fear, I wanted so badly to tell her everything was going to be fine but I couldn't be sure at this point. I wrapped her in my arms and I immediately realized she'd put her shield up.

'What are we going to do Edward?' her thought was colored in the same pain her face possessed.

I kissed the top of her hair and replied to the entire room.

"We have to go to the Volturi, once Aro sees Alice's vision… that there is a vampire out there that could possibly be stronger than they are, I'm sure they won't waste time trying to use my services they will more than likely try to stop Joham without delay…"

"But what if they can't…stop him?" Bella asked a loud, her voice a soft whisper. I didn't have a response. I just held her tighter; it was all I could do.

**Renesmee POV **

I don't know how much time passed before I was startled out of my trance by three loud booming knocks at Jacob's front door.

It was more than likely Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rosalie it was ridiculous and insulting-to Billy- for how many times my Grandpa Charlie and my uncle and aunt stopped by the reservation to spy on me in the last four days. This was definitely my mothers doing. I heard Jacob yawn loudly- he must have fallen asleep, wow how long had I been sitting here? - shuffling to get out of his bed.

"I got it" I yelled back, getting the door was the least I could do since I was being a complete party pooper. I slowly got up stretching my arms and legs, for as long as I sat in that chair I was surprised my body hadn't left an indentation in the cushion.

"Coming" I called out sleepily.

I opened the door; my eyes were staring at the ground as I wiped them absent mindedly.

"You know you guys don't have to drop by every two hours, I…" finally looking up; I couldn't finish my sentence. My mouth fell to the floor and my heart picked up to an unnatural pace.

I had to force my voice to the surface; my voice had fallen to the back of my throat afraid to be heard.

"N…Nahuel…?" I stuttered in shock. This was the last place I expected to see him; this was the last place he should be.

"Nessie" He breathed out in relief; in that same breath his arms were wrapped around me; his hug was tight as I was being lifted off of the ground a squeezed.

I heard a menacing growl and knew at that point that Jacob was standing directly behind me.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9 Growing Attraction

"Get off of my property" Jacob hissed through his teeth and for some reason it felt like he was referring to me as the property not his porch.

I quickly started wiggling out of Nahuel's hold and he released me in that same motion.

"What the hell are you doing here? You haven't caused enough problems?" Jacob was scary to even look at.

"Jake" I spun around towards him, I did not want this to escalate

"Nessie I need to talk to you… alone" Nahuel said ignoring Jacob all together

"Over your dead body" Jacob countered

"Please enough" I shouted.

"It's important that I talk to you privately" Nahuel continued

"She's not going anywhere with you …"

"I think that's her decision Jacob" Nahuel interrupted

I needed to know what Nahuel wanted to tell me, if it was about his father it was important that I had all the information so I could get my family back here as soon as possible.

"Well, you're sure as hell not going to make that decision for her…" Jacob was saying.

"Jacob, please. I'll just be on the porch, I won't step one foot off of it. I promise" I pleaded with him trying to sustain our eye contact.

Jacob shook his head before he spoke 'So I guess you're done moping on the couch then, huh?"

"Jake, that's not…" I tried to explain but he put his hand up and walked away. I stared after him. It cut so deep that I'd hurt him…again. It seemed like I kept doing that a lot lately. I was still staring at where Jacob had been standing when I was brought back to reality when I heard Nahuel's voice.

"Ness, can we talk now" his tone was eager

I held my eyes just a moment longer debating whether I should go and talk to Jacob; explain to him why I thought it was important to see what Nahuel had to say. But I decided against it.

"Ah…yea" I said as I walked out the front door.

"Nahuel, what are you doing here? In fact how did you even know I was here?" I questioned as I wrapped my hands around my stomach. It was still raining but not as hard as it had been. I was completely protected by the awning on the porch but Nahuel stood in the rain, his face was drenched looking glorious as his long black hair stuck to his dark skin.

I'd forgotten the question I'd asked him.

"I was left in the dark, I couldn't bare it. I went to your house and no one was there, so I panicked" he continued speaking rapidly "And then I went to your grandparent's house, there was no answer at first but then, finally your aunt…?" he asked to make sure; I nodded "Well your aunt told me you were here"

I shook my head to myself, just like my aunt Rosalie to send Nahuel here to Jacob's house knowing how Jacob felt about him. They wouldn't stop at anything to upset or bother one another.

"I needed to see you" he said embarrassed.

"You did?"

"Yes, Nessie…I know it might seem too soon or even a little crazy, but staying away from you isn't something I'm willing to do, I don't think it is something I am even capable of doing"

I just stood there in the silence; I tried with difficulty to swallow the lump that formed in my throat. I knew my cheeks were red, my whole body felt hot. I needed to say something…anything.

"You said…" I coughed clearing my throat "you had something to tell me, was that what you wanted to tell me?" my voice was shaky in an embarrassing way.

"Well no actually, I came here to tell you that my father is in Africa"

"He is, that's great and does he plan on coming back?" part of me regretted asking the question; I was nervous for the answer.

"That I am unsure of but I do know he is a very busy man, I think he is scared of your family, personally I don't see him coming back…not alone at least"

"What do you mean not alone?" I asked hesitantly

"My father is a very smart man, if he had any desire to come back here for…" he paused wincing slightly at his words "…you, he wouldn't come alone he may be strong but he is a coward"

I absorbed Nahuel's words, before speaking again "So, you don't think he is coming back?" trying to minimize my excitement from this news.

"As I said, I can't be sure, but honestly …no…I don't think he is"

I felt relief cover my body; I could only hope that this was enough to convince my father to leave the Volturi's offer on the table and bring my entire family back home.

"Wait right here" I said excitedly, as I ran back into the house grabbing my cell phone that hadn't rang in three days. I called my mother, but there was no answer. So, I decided to leave a voicemail 'Hey mom, I haven't heard from you guys in days, what's going on? I just wanted to say that I talked to Nahuel and his father is in Africa and he doesn't think he will come back" it was hard to hide the excitement in my voice "So, I think everything will be fine. Please call me back as soon as you get this, I love and miss you and tell everyone that I love and miss them too" I hung up the phone, laying it back on the window pane.

I wanted to tell Jacob the good news but I knew he was very angry with me. I heard Jacob slamming cabinets and drawers in the kitchen. I paused and decided arguing with Jacob in front of Nahuel wasn't really something I felt like going through today.

I went back outside; closing the door completely. Nahuel was still standing there, his honey colored eyes protected by his long black lashes. He smiled and I'd forgotten what time and what day of the week it was, he looked like he was a portrait that should have been hanging in some high end museum in Europe.

His skin was soft chocolate; it being extra appealing because of the rain that was dripping down his face. His soaked t-shirt clung to his body exaggerating every single, muscle and ripple. I was mystified before I slowly sprang out of my gaze. I probably had the most bemused look on my face when I realized that I wasn't just staring at him but I was gawking at him, marveling in his beauty.

"Thank you, Nahuel" I said abruptly "A lot"

"For what…? I haven't done anything" he laughed.

"For the information…about your father" I retorted. He just smiled and nodded.

I smiled along with him.

"So, what are you doing today?" I needed something to ask him, the silence was growing and I couldn't just stand there staring…gawking at him.

"Well, actually I was hoping to spend some time with you" he looked down at his soaked hands; the rain was starting to let up "Is that a lot to ask?"

I looked at him and my mind immediately flashed to Jacob's face. As badly as I wanted to I knew there was no way Jacob would allow me to leave anywhere with Nahuel or anywhere that he couldn't see me.

"Nahuel" I said apologetically.

"It's ok Ness, I get it… your baby sitter isn't going to go for that" Nahuel was obviously joking, but it struck a chord. I was just as much an adult as he was. I didn't need a baby sitter.

"What…? I don't need a baby sitter" I barked.

"Hey…hey… I was just joking" he defended "Sorry, I seriously didn't mean to offend you"

"No, its not you" I said in a much calmer tone "Your right actually"

"Right about what…?"

"Right about the fact that it's more like being with my baby sitter in there rather than being with my boy…" I stopped; I didn't understand why I felt so uncomfortable claiming Jacob as my boy friend in front of Nahuel.

"Boy friend…?" Nahuel continued on with my sentence.

"Yes" I said simply.

"Well, he is only trying to protect you Nessie; you can't blame him for being a little over bearing" Nahuel said with a heart melting smile.

"A… little…over bearing?" I asked sarcastically

Nahuel laughed and shrugged "How ever you look at it he is only doing what he thinks is best for you"

I looked at him in pure confusion.

"What…?" Nahuel asked.

"Why…why do you do that?"

"Do what…?" He asked perplexed

"Why do you defend him? After everything, his unwarranted jealousy, his threats…and yet you still find nice things to say"

He thought about my question for a moment before he answered.

"Nessie, it's like I said before. If I were in his position I would be the same way. Girls like you are hard to come by…there is something very special about you" he walked out of the drizzle; up the steps towards me "…and his jealousy isn't unwarranted"

I peered at him baffled "Wh…?"

"I thought I made it blatantly clear how I feel about you Nessie? He should be jealous…I've only just begun" he grabbed my hand as he pierced into my eyes. At that moment I'd lost the ability to speak. I felt like an infant who hadn't learned how to structure a proper sentence yet.

"Nessie, you might not think you are able to fight that whole imprinting thing, but you know as well as I know that you are having just as hard of a time fighting…whatever it is that we have."

My mind was racing not picking a clear direction to go. I needed to speak I needed something to happen, me standing there for all of eternity was not going to help with this at all.

Before I could think coherently, I heard an annoying buzzing in the background; it was persistent and growing louder.

"Aren't you going to get that?" Nahuel asked,

"Get …what…?" I asked barely lucid from my carousel of thoughts.

"Your phone it's probably your mom calling back" there was humor in his voice.

"My phone…?" I said confused "Oh my phone!" I quickly snapped out of my spell and ran back into the house and snatched my cell phone only to see it had stopped ringing, the red light was flashing indicating I had a voicemail.

I pressed in my pass code and listened. 'You have one unheard message, Press one to play message' I did and I felt pure relief to hear my mother say "Renesmee, why aren't you answering your phone?" I laughed at her tone and continued to listen. "It's important that you…" the message was muffled and buried in static "Africa…and…" It seemed like every other word was being cut out of the message. "Joham…home…two weeks"

It was so frustrating the message was in shambles "…soon…love you" was the last thing I could decipher. I could only assume that she was saying she got my message about Joham and that they would be home in two weeks.

I went to dial her number when I noticed Jacob through the side window leaving out of the back door of the house. I sat my phone back down on the window pane.

"Jake" I called from the house, he didn't turn around. I sprinted to the back door and called his name again. The rain was picking up again and it crashed loudly against the house. Jacob was standing there in nothing but cargo shorts, the rain trickled down the slopes of his extremely muscular frame.

It always amazed me to see how simply gorgeous he was. He called back "What Nessie…?" I almost jumped; I was so lost in his god like beauty.

"Where are you going?" I yelled; my voice battling against the rain.

"Does it matter…?" he replied

"What…? Yea it does"

He just shook his head and started walking away again.

"Jacob" I called out loudly, running into the rain after him, I was next to him in seconds. The rain struck my skin roughly splashing in every direction.

"Jake…wait, seriously where are you going?"

"Away so you and your new… friend… can have sometime alone" he spat vehemently.

"Jake" I shook my head "It's not like that…you know it"

"Do I know that Nessie? Because it's not what it sounded like"

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Of course Jacob heard what was going on. How could I have been so inconsiderate, so unaware, so…stupid? But this wasn't like Jacob, to just walk away, to not fight; there was something more going on.

"I'm sorry, but Jake I love you. Yes I do have small tiny none detrimental feelings for Nahuel" I decided being honest was my best bet to hope this would boil over. "It could never compare to how I feel about you…you know that"

"Ness…" he was about to say something but he opted not to "Goodbye" he just shook his head and started to walk away again.

"Jake, so you're just going to leave me here?" I yelled completely soaked by the rain.

"You're that mad at me that you would just leave me here with Joham out there…?"

"Oh save it Nessie, I know that Joham is in Africa, I heard you when you called your mom" he turned around I didn't like how his eyes looked "I know your use to your big mansion, but this is a small house Ness, word travels fast."

I just stared at him not knowing how to respond.

His voice was a lot calmer but still painted with anger "I would never leave you here alone…Seth, Paul and Leah or out back" he said simply then he walked away.

I watched him as the heat rose off of his skin. I couldn't bare to see him walk away from me.

"I'm sorry" I yelled but he kept walking "I'm sorry" my apology turned into begging. He couldn't walk away and he couldn't leave this upset at me.

"Jake, please. I'm so stupid, I know it, I know I don't deserve you… please Jake I'm sorry" I was yelling louder and louder for every step he took. I was completely vulnerable and he didn't seem to pay it any mind and I deserved that.

"Jake I love you…I don't love him, Nahuel means nothing to me…you have to believe me" My face was drenched I couldn't tell the difference from the rain and my tears. "Jake you have to believe me… I'll prove it to you"

I ran to him in a blink of an eye, he still kept his pace I latched on to his soaking wet body as he continued to walk. "Go back to the house" he said through his teeth but he didn't try to knock me off I started kissing him on his neck, trying to reach his lips but then he picked me up and placed my feet back on the ground.

"That's not going to work this time…but I'm sure Nahuel will be putty in your hands if you try it on him" his words cut straight through me.

I felt my heart literally break into millions of little pieces, At that moment I knew that Jacob was my everything and that I'd let my confusion get the better of me. Yes, I felt something with Nahuel but Jacob…my Jacob… nothing could take me from him.

Had I actually done it? Had I become the fist person in the history of time to actually alter and put a huge glitch in imprinting? Had I played with fire so much that I was going to let my happiness walk away from me because of my curiosity of imprinting's power?

I needed Jacob to believe me, he needed to know that I was serious; he needed to know that I wanted him and only him for the rest of my life…for the rest of my existence. He needed to know that I was done playing these games, done hurting him, done making him feel like he wasn't an important part of my life…the most important part of my life.

As he continued to walk away with the rain crashing off of his body, I called out my voice eager and panicked.

"Jake…don't do this…don't walk away from me…please" I paused before I spoke again.

"Jacob Black" I shouted "Marry me"

He stopped; his back still faced me. I slowly walked to him grabbing his hand. Now I was face to face with him. I was looking up into his eyes, I couldn't read his face he just stared down at me the rain was so heavy if it weren't for my vampire senses it would definitely be hard to see.

As we stood there silently, I knew I'd never been this sure about anything in my life. If this is what I needed to do to prove to him that I was serious and that I couldn't stand to be without him than this is what I would do.

I smiled faintly as the rain ran over my lips.

"Jacob" I said softly "I want to marry you"


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10 Fairytale…maybe

"Nessie…this is not something to joke about" Jacob's voice was very controlled

"Who says I'm joking Jake?" my voice was loud losing the war with the roaring of the rain.

"You know I want to spend the rest of my life with you" he said as he grabbed my other hand "but this…what your asking is only because you feel guilty, you think you have something to prove"

"Yes I feel guilty and yes I want to prove to you that you are the only one for me but…" I gathered my thoughts "I want this…I want to marry you, why wait Jacob? It's inevitable"

He just stared at me; I was still unable to read his face.

"Oh" I said as realization crept over me "You…you don't want to marry me…" I let go of his hands embarrassment running through my body, I'd put myself on the line only to be rejected, but I deserved it.

I started to walk away but he grabbed my arm. "Nessie, what do you think saying 'I want to spend the rest of my life with you' means?"

I just looked at him.

"Honey, this is what you want…its not just reaction from… Nahuel? You are sure about this"

"Yes, Jacob this is what I want more than anything…Nahuel is nothing to me…nothing"

He looked at me and smiled slightly, his eyes were warmer.

"Ok, then we should do this right" he smiled.

"Right…?" I quizzed.

Suddenly Jacob was on the ground one knee buried in the mud, the rain pounding violently on both of us.

"Renesmee" he said as he took my hand "Will you please make me the luckiest man to have ever walked the face of this earth? Will you marry me?"

My smile could not beam any wider across my face. I slid to the ground in front or him burying both of my knees in the mud. I grabbed both sides of his face and kissed him passionately. Then I wrapped my arms around his neck squeezing as tight as I could.

"So…" Jacob questioned

"So…what…?" I said happily, my arms still clenched around his neck.

"Ah…it's kind of a yes or no question" he said sarcastically.

I didn't realize I hadn't answered.

"Oh" I laughed looking at him "Yes…Yes I will marry you"

**Nahuel POV**

That was probably the hardest thing I've done –wearing my heart on my sleeve- but I'm glad I did it. Nessie needed to know that I was serious about her and that I don't think her heart should be strung along on some tethered rope called imprinting.

Jacob Black is the love her life, but is this because her mind is trained and molded to believe he is? Or does she truly feel this intense for him? What happens when we are together is undeniable. It was nothing I'd ever experienced.

I think it's something about us being one in the same, coming from the same mold of half human half vampire raised to fit in with the "normal" crowd.

It was wrong of me -and I knew it- to pursue her, but I couldn't ignore this feeling…she couldn't ignore it either. I'd never thought I'd be that guy who would try to steal another mans woman but Nessie had some hold over my heart that I was physically unable to escape.

I loved her… too much for my own good.

There isn't a word big enough to describe the love I feel for her and it was all so sudden.

I sat on the porch as she went to answer her phone.

I somehow needed a chance for us to sit somewhere, without an ease dropping werewolf around, but there was no way she was going to leave, this hold he had on her almost seemed unhealthy.

I knew I was as blunt as I could be with her, she knew my feelings and even though she didn't speak it her eyes said it all.

I could see she was battling with her self. I felt bad to cause her this much stress but what if she was making a huge mistake by ignoring the pull she has for because of some mythical voodoo she had with Jacob?

"Jake, so you're just going to leave me here" I heard Nessie yell. I focused on what I could, it most definitely sounded like they were fighting. She yelled about being left behind with Joham then I heard her screaming that she was sorry.

It twisted knots in my stomach to hear her so weak so vulnerable. How could he let her beg like this, I so badly wanted to go get her but it wasn't my place.

When I picture Nessie, she is drop dead gorgeous, strong, funny, kind hearted, brave but to hear her beg for him was simply demeaning. It took every fiber in my body not to run to the back of the house to defend her; to tell Jacob he was a coward for making Nessie belittle herself like this.

She was screaming at the top of her lungs that she was stupid, that she didn't deserve him. This could not have been the same girl who I'd seen her whole life literally from her own palms. In her thoughts I saw spectacular colors, happiness, love, respect, independence among many other things.

This girl I heard right now was broken, damaged and feeble. This was pathetic; never did I imagine Nessie to be fragile. Hearing the anguish in her voice made me cower; I so badly wanted to run to her side and hold her, to try and make the pain go away…

"Jake I love you…I don't love him, Nahuel means nothing to me…you have to believe me"

It was like someone stabbed a dagger right through my heart. She couldn't mean those words-even though she yelled them out fervently. She was saying these things to appease him…to tell him what he wanted to hear. I know what I saw in her eyes, I felt her pulse when I told her how I felt, and there was no denying it. And yet her words tore through me like thorns.

I couldn't take it anymore; I needed to clear my mind. Nessie had to acknowledge she had feelings for me and she will accept the fact that I am willing to fight for her.

To the death.

**Renesmee POV**

"So, we're engaged" my voice joyous

"Yes…we are engaged" Jacob smiled rain droplets getting into his mouth "Sorry about the no ring thing" he laughed

"It's ok Jake, I kind of understand why you weren't prepared" I teased.

We just stared at each other for a long while before Jacob spoke

"I think we should get out of the mud and wash up"

"Ok" I said not really listening to what he said but just focusing on keeping his eye contact.

"Jake, I love you" I said this like it was the first time I'd ever said it, like it was brand new information that I'd just obtained, like it was a foreign language.

He looked at me comically.

"I would hope so" he winked

"No, Jake…really I love you so much. I've been so stupid; I don't understand why I keep hurting you…"

"Shhh" he put his finger to my lips "You are my fiancé now and we are starting with a fresh slate, we are not going to worry about anything else from before…" he paused his face grew serious "except the fact that we need to ask your friend to leave"

I hadn't thought that part through yet, but it didn't matter. Nahuel needed to leave and it should be my responsibility to make sure he did.

"Right" I said my voice shaky as Jacob helped me up from the mud. Jacob interlocked his fingers into mine as we walked around the house. I took in a deep breath of air, closing my eyes before we rounded the corner.

I opened my eyes and to my surprise Nahuel was gone.

I wonder what made him leave, and then I realized that I'd been yelling so loud when I was trying to stop Jacob, he had to have heard me. He had to have heard the mean things I said. My chest tightened and a knot grew in my throat, I felt sick for being so mean to Nahuel when he didn't deserve it.

"Well looks like that's handled" Jacob said snidely but I ignored it I didn't want to start an argument just moments after getting engaged.

"Ok, let's get clean so we can go…" Jacob said blissfully

"Go where…?" I said coming out of my reverie

"I'm guessing Port Angeles…"

I looked at him puzzled

"…Or Seattle…?" he said quickly, he obviously misread my facial expression.

"No Jake, I mean what's in Port Angeles? And Seattle…?"

"Oh, well Seattle has a Tiffany's but I know you are not into that fancy stuff. And Port Angeles has a few antique shops that kind of stuff you and your mom like, but its up to you…if you want Tiffany's you can have it" he beamed.

Slowly I realized what he was talking about, I was so wrapped up in feeling guilty for Nahuel that I'd totally misunderstood every word that was coming out of Jacob's mouth.

I smiled before speaking "My ring" I said happily

"Yes Sherlock" he said jokingly, I punched him and he laughed. The sun was starting to come out and the rain had finally stopped.

"So where to…?" he asked his smile brighter than I'd ever seen on his face.

"Definitely Port Angeles" I smiled.

"I figured you wouldn't be too happy with the whole Tiffany's thing"

"You know me so well Mr. Black" I leaned up to kiss him.

"I sure do almost Mrs. Black" he said as our lips were still connected.

Mrs. Black…I couldn't wait until the day this became official.

**Chapter 10 Part II**

"Stop staring at me" I laughed as we sat on the couch in his living room watching television.

"Sorry" he said smirking still not breaking his gaze.

I sat there still watching the television and I could feel his eyes burning through the side of my face.

"Jake…!" I said embarrassingly, he was making me feel self conscience.

"Sorry, I can't help it" his smile lit up the whole room, it was so cliché to say but it was so true.

"It's just; I don't think I ever really looked at you before"

I didn't know what he meant; I just stared at him blankly waiting for him to continue.

"You've always been beautiful that much is too obvious to ignore…but when I look at you now I see everything, our future, our past, our present. Happiness is just radiating off of you, I can't take my eyes off of you it's almost like you are a completely different person…"

"I am, and I know why" I interrupted. He looked at me confused.

"Jake, I was never fully in it" I said shamefully "I was trying to see how far I could push imprinting but last week when you were going to leave me" I choked over the last two words "I knew that I was crazy, I knew that imprinting or not I needed to be with you and fighting was the most absurd thing I could possibly do. It all set in, it all made sense to me" I smiled "That's why everything is new to you…new to me. I look different because I feel different. I am different. You've changed me for the better Jacob"

I once again put my heart on full display, but this time I didn't care and I wasn't embarrassed. Jacob needed to know everything from now on. I owed it to him.

Jacob was trying to conceal a laugh which confused and surprised me.

"What…?" my eyebrows perched.

"Nessie, I was never going to leave you"

"But you wouldn't turn around…you wouldn't listen…you were walking away?" I quizzed.

"Because I was mad…but unlike you; I knew how I felt about you. And I knew the powers of imprinting I couldn't leave you…if I did I would be nothing, I would be miserable. If I didn't have you I wouldn't want to live, I don't think I would be able to live…it's that strong"

I looked at him wondering how much of a fool I must've looked like too him; screaming for him to stay drenched in the rain, crying hysterically and he was never leaving.

"Then where were you going?" I turned my whole body to face him

"To your house, to grab some things to get some fresh air" his face got serious "After what he said to you, I almost went out there and tore him to shreds" his face was rigid and intense.

"But I had trust" he gazed at me; I could still see the pain in his eyes trying to surface

I looked at him feeling completely unworthy of his trust at that point for how'd I acted.

"You had trust in the imprint…" I started to say

"No Nessie…imprinting aside, I knew that you wouldn't do anything, I knew that it wouldn't go too far. I knew how you felt about me before you were even sure" he took in a deep breath "But when he said those things and you didn't defend…us… I needed to either get some fresh air or kill him. I opted for the one that would hurt you less"

My heart was a huge knot; I searched long and hard for the right words to say.

"Jake" I breathed, I felt my tears about to brim out of my eyes as I spoke

"That fresh air you were going to get…well I thought it was you saying goodbye to… us…that hurt me so badly" before he could speak I quickly added "And I deserved it, that was the scariest moment of my life and I will never have to go through that again" I said the last part mostly to myself as reassurance.

He reached over and hugged me and we just sat there in the welcomed silence. I closed my eyes and really relished in the bliss I was feeling at this moment.

Everything was happening so fast, but it all seemed to be moving right on course. Maybe this was how my life was supposed to be; a lot happening at once and very quickly. That is pretty much the definition of my life…aging quickly…maturating quickly…falling in love quickly. Everything seemed to be on fast forward and I realized I'd prefer that over autopilot any day.

Jacob grabbed my left hand, holding it slightly up, using his thumb to caress under my ring finger.

"It's beautiful" I whispered. When he turned my hand toward him, the little diamonds on the side glistened and when the beautiful rounded diamond in the middle hit the light just right; magnificent reflecting rays shown brightly from its bed.

"You spent way too much though" my voice was playfully stern.

"You don't know how much I spent" his words very cocky "I sweet talked the lady for a discount". I rolled my eyes ignoring his story but it was true, I didn't know how much he paid for it because he made me leave the store.

"Jake that heart shaped one was beautiful and I know it was a lot cheaper"

"Hush" he said flatly, still holding my hand up letting the diamonds sparkle in the light.

"That heart shaped ring would be perfect if you kept a magnifying glass in your pocket at all times" he joked.

"Oh whatever that ring had personality" I defended

"Yea because it didn't have much else" he teased. I shoved him with my right hand, my left one still secure in his hand.

"Besides Ness, I don't know why you are defending that other ring. I saw your eyes when you saw this one…I think you fell in love with this ring quicker than you fell in love with me" he poked my side.

He was right-not about the falling in love with the ring quicker than him- as soon as I saw this ring and tried it on I knew it was the one, but I saw that original price tag and decided there was no way I would let him spend that kind of money on me. But he caught my face; he saw my eyes light up. He knew me so well. He wouldn't even let me try on another ring and before I knew he was kicking me out of the store and snatching it off of my finger to pay for it.

We playfully nudged and punched and tickled each other for a while until Jacob grabbed my hand again.

"So…we have a few humans, a little over a dozen werewolves and a hand full of vampires who have no clue about this" Jacob was trying to be funny, but my stomach lurched.

I honestly didn't think about the "telling people" part. I'd been so caught up in my little world of happiness with Jacob that I neglected to look at the bigger picture.

"My dad" I gasped out.

"Ness…cool it" Jacob said concerned

"Jake…my dad…? He thought I was too young to even know about the imprinting let alone getting married?" I was speaking way too fast

"Just bring up how old your mom was when they got married" Jacob concluded as if it were an open and closed case. Did he not understand? He of all people should know my father and my fathers over reactions.

"I already played that card when I wanted to have sex with you" I said way too quickly

Jacob smiled and then his eyebrows perched "You talk to your dad about having sex with me?" his voice seemed embarrassed and slightly pissed.

"Jake, seriously…? That's what you want to talk about right now?" my voice was panicked and loud I thought I was going to hyperventilate. How did I possibly not consider the fact that I would have to tell my parents and family? I'm 17; would they even take me seriously?

"Ness…Ness…Ness" Jacob said as he wrapped his arms around me "You…need…to calm down before you pass out again" he laughed. I glared at him wondering how he could find humor in my homicide, because that's what it's going to be when my dad finds out.

"Sorry" he laughed "I was kidding" he tried to control his smile for my benefit but he failed miserably.

"How about this" he said letting go of me, so he could face me "How about we test the waters on Billy first when he comes back tonight" Jacob's eyes were hopeful that this would calm me down.

"Yea…Jake lets tell your harmless human father that we are engaged, that's great practice for telling my venomous vampire father"

Jacob pressed his lips together it was evident he was trying to push back laughter.

"Ok, Ness…how about we have dinner tonight"

I looked at him like he was an idiot "Dinner? Jake I…"

"Just hear me out" he interrupted "Me, you, Billy, Charlie, Sue, Em and Rose…" he purposely choked over the last name "Have them come over, tell them the great news and weigh their reactions"

It didn't sound like a half bad idea, even though my uncle and aunt couldn't eat, they would still come over. It was just going to be rough and highly annoying; it always is when Aunt Rosalie and Jacob are in the same room.

Jacob stood up his face excited at his idea, how his smile could make me forget anything. I stood up in front of him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"So what are you cooking?" I said as I laid my head on his chest.

Jacob just squeezed me tighter planting a gentle kiss on top of my hair.

"Well for us food eating types… I was thinking some steaks…yours, rare of course" he said still talking into my hair "And for our 'other' guest I was going to run down to the Red Cross really quick and pick up a few pints of B positive"

I shoved him as hard as I could; completely failing at covering up my laughter.

"Don't you even start…!" I laughed as I playfully punched him "Promise me Jake"

"Promise you what?" he said as he tried blocking every one of my punches.

"Promise me no fighting with Rose tonight"

"No deal" he said flatly. I looked at him deviously and lurched towards him. I grabbed his right arm and twisted it behind his back, I then hopped up on his back placing my lips on his neck.

"Promise me or I'm going right to the jugular" I laughed

"Nope I can't make that promise…sorry"

I twisted his arm tighter, and he yelped in mock agony. I let my teeth trace the side of his neck

"Promise!" I demanded as I pulled his arm even further back behind him in an awkward angle.

"Ok…ok…ok…!" he conceded "I promise no fighting…no fighting" he laughed in mock pain.

"Thank you" I said confidently. I released his hand and kissed his neck before I hopped down.

"I can't believe I am a victim of domestic violence" Jacob said as he playfully collapsed to the floor.

"Well when I want my way I get it" I plopped down right next to him on the floor.

We just looked at each other, no words needed to be said we both knew what the other was thinking. We both rolled facing each other and at the same time we moved in to kiss, this kiss felt right. This kiss didn't feel eager, or forced it didn't feel premeditated it felt like we would be doing this for the rest of our lives and I knew we would.

As soon as Jacob's hands were under my shirt caressing the side of my stomach and my hands slowly began to pull his shirt up, I heard that annoying buzzing from the other room

"Ugh" I said as I went to sit up then stand "I'm thinking this is some sort of a sign" I said frustrated. He just laughed and laid there as I walked to the kitchen to grab my cell.

"It's ok, we have all the time in the world, and I'll be right here when you get back" he teased.

I smiled; those words meant more to me than he could ever imagine.

"Hello" I answered into the receiver my voice was probably very unwelcoming.

"Renesmee…? Where…been…your phone?"

I didn't recognize the number but that was definitely my mother talking. Once again every other word seemed to be missing.

"Hello…mom…wait, I can't hear you. What…?"

"Joham…alone…coming back…hear me?"

"No, I can't hear you…can you text me?" and before I knew it an operator was saying this number was no longer in service. I knew they were probably on there way back I just wish someone would have a decent phone to communicate with me.

"Everything ok…?" Jacob asked as he walked up behind me, putting his arms around my waist. It was so rare that I would be this happy, I didn't think one person deserved this much happiness it was enough to spoil me.

I turned around to face him "Yea…its fine, my mom was on some crappy hotel phone I could barely hear her but I did hear her say they were coming back" I beamed.

Jacob smiled and lowered his face until our lips met. This was the only thing I was prepared to focus on. This was something I was more than willing to do for the rest of my life.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11 Too Close for Comfort

I washed the last of the dishes from the dinner "party" last night. It was so nerve racking. I remember looking at Jacob nervously as he just beamed dying to share our big news. I didn't want any part of it.

"Ness…its fine" Jacob whispered to me. I looked at him, nodded nervously and walked into the living room.

"Umm…Uncle Em, Aunt Rose can you two come in the dining room for a minute?" My voice over shadowed by nerves. Billy, Grandpa Charlie and Sue were sitting at the table eating steak and potatoes that Jacob cooked. It wasn't a far walk for my uncle and aunt because Jacob house was barely big enough to fit three people let alone a dinner party with seven total guests.

Everyone was seated, grandpa Charlie was still shoving chunks of potato in his mouth he'd already devoured the steak. Jacob and I were standing at the head of the table, slowly all eyes were on us. I froze.

I felt Jacob tap the side of my leg to break me out of my coma.

"Ah…" I choked out "I…" I couldn't find the proper words why was the English language failing me right now, when I needed it the most.

"We…me and Jacob… have something we would like to tell you all"

My grandpa Charlie finally unburied his face from his plate, his eyes big in shock.

"Nessie you better not be telling us you're pregnant" he ordered.

I gulped audibly "No…grandpa, I'm not" I smiled weakly feeling sick to my stomach. He looked at me his eyes moved to my stomach than back to my face.

"Ok, sorry about that. You just can't start sentences off like that" he said relieved. Sue smiled and rubbed his back as he crammed another potato into his mouth,

Everyone was staring at me, waiting for me to talk; even Jacob had his eyes locked on me...traitor…he could chime in at anytime, I thought to myself. I could hear my own heart beating, I could hear everyone's heart beating-except uncle Em and aunt Rose of course- I could here the tick tocks of the clock each second reminding me of how long I was going without saying a word.

If it were this hard to tell them, there was absolutely no way in a million years I could tell my parents. I most definitely would faint.

"Sweetheart what is going on?" Aunt Rose asked then her eyes flitted to Jacob "What did you do to her you vermin"

"Aunt Rose!" I said sternly

"You know what blondie I…"

I shoved Jacob in his side before he could say anymore "you promised" I reminded him lowly barley moving my lips.

He glowered at her for a moment then nodded.

"Ok, everyone Jacob and I love each other…a lot. You all know that by now"

Everyone just stared; I remember feeling like a bad comic who still had ten minutes left in his set but ran out of material… the audience was going to start booing any second now.

"Well" I said shoving my hand into my pocket digging around until I found what I was looking for "We…we are… engaged" I pulled the ring out of my pocket and placed it on my left ring finger.

There was a moment that passed when no one said anything, and then I heard my aunt Rosalie say- sarcastically- "Was dreading the day this would come…great" so low that Grandpa Charlie, Sue and Billy's human ears couldn't detect it.

Finally my grandpa Charlie spoke. "Well angel face your really young don't you think?" I just smiled weakly "…but if your parents are ok with it I am" he got up and hugged me "congratulations baby girl" he continued. My face was frozen and my uncle Emmett spotted it out.

"Hey lock Ness, your parents have no clue do they?" Uncle Emmett's voice was full of humor; I wanted to punch him.

"No, not exactly" I said through my teeth. In the corner of my eye I saw Billy smiling as Jacob walked over to him to hug him. Why couldn't it be that easy for me with my family?

"Wow, I want a first row seat for when Edward hears this!" Uncle Emmett laughed

Before I could say something-or do something- that I was going to regret, my aunt Rosalie was by my side. She grabbed my hand and looked at the ring examining it for a while before she spoke again.

"Hmm" she said as she lifted my hand higher "He didn't do too badly for someone who runs around on all fours all day as an occupation"

"Aunt Rose, please" I pleaded with her; she knew he worked on cars and made good money doing it.

"I'm sorry" she smiled half heartedly "I'm happy for you Renesmee and I know you are happy and that's all that should matter. Don't let your father ruin this moment for you"

She released my hand and stood directly in front of me. "We all knew this would happen eventually, so if he tries to rain on your parade I'll be there standing right next to you with an umbrella ok?"

I smiled at her; she had no idea what it meant to have someone ok with this…someone on my side besides Jacob.

"Thank you" I said as she kissed my cheek.

"How I wish you weren't marrying a dog, but if you must" she said in disgust.

I looked at her again my eyes begging her not to start a fight. She smiled and mouthed

"Sorry"

So all in all last night telling my family wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, the real hard part was yet to come. Bella and…Edward

I put the last cup under the water rinsing off the soap suds when I heard a soft knock at the front door.

"I'm coming" I called out grabbing a towel off of the towel rack to dry my hands. I wanted to surprise Jacob and Billy -when they came back from Billy's doctor appointment- by cleaning the entire house from top to bottom; show them I appreciated them letting me stay here while my parents sorted out things in Italy.

Jacob was adamant that I ride along but I was able to persuade him to let me stay; I would be perfectly fine and if it made him feel better he could have Leah and Seth patrol. He pondered it for a while and he realized I haven't been in any real danger Joham was gone and Jacob realized he was only going to be gone for two hours at the most.

As I walked to open the door, it hit me… a strange scent, it was fragrant, floral, it was unfamiliar…it was a vampire. I froze.

This was unusual; usually a vampire's scent was undeniable but this scent it was almost like I had to search for it just to be sure.

I was only inches away from the door, I knew any movement I made, this vampire would hear it, this vampire more than likely knew I was standing here just for the simple fact my heart was racing at one million miles per hour.

I slowly patted my jean pockets in search of my cell phone then I heard it buzzing, of course it was in the other room. It was probably my mother calling again. And then the house phone rang.

Before I could think, of what to do next, there was a loud crashing sound, the front door was knocked down shards of wood scattering everywhere. And in the doorway piercing in with bright red blood shot eyes; gawking at me stood a vampire.

My whole body was tense. I didn't have time to process. I'd never seen this vampire before. She was blindingly beautiful, her skin was so pale it looked transparent, her hair was long and blond and she was tall for a girl at least 5'10. She was very skinny, her neck was elongated.

"So you're Renesmee" she said almost disappointed. Her voice was high pitched like a bell, she looked to be about my age and her voice indicated that as well.

I didn't say anything even though I was sure she was stating fact and not asking a question.

"Hmm" She looked me up and down then shrugged her shoulders "I don't see the big deal"

She stood there still examining my features; I didn't know what she meant by that.

"You're nothing too special sweetheart…sorry to say" her voice was smug as if she had something against me. I didn't know how that was possible I didn't know her.

"I guess Joham has peculiar taste"

I gasped my limbs felt weak. I had to have been hearing things

"Joham" I choked out weakly, it felt like the walls were caving in. He decided to come back for me. He didn't forget, he waited until I was alone. My eyes started to fill with water.

"Oh, she talks!" she said sarcastically. "Oh god seriously don't cry"

I just looked at her shaking my head as the reality of what was happening set in.

"You act like he wants to kill you…trust me he doesn't, you would have been dead by now if that were the case"

I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"You know Renesmee; you do make a good point though"

I was lost I hadn't said anything but she was obviously having fun with my fear.

"I could always kill you, I am quite thirsty…but Joham would probably be pissed and let me tell you, he is no fun to be around when he is pissed" she laughed.

Then her face turned serious 'Ok, your no fun either…can't take a joke?"

"Why are you here…what do you want?" I finally spoke, my voice shaky riddled with anguish, I already knew the answer to my questions.

"Why…? Because I wanted to see what Joham was so obsessed with and what I want is for you to cooperate"

"Cooperate?" I repeated

"Yes…uh … who is it?" she was speaking to herself "Umm Alice or something right? She's like your Aunt…?"

I nodded.

"Well we know about her visions and we know that when a decision is set in stone; she can see those visions" she took two steps inside of the house "Well Joham planned on coming next week, and he has had this planned for some time now. But I'm smart I knew your family would expect it and prepare to fight, but who has the time for that right?" she smiled.

She glanced around the small room "So I acted on impulse…and ta da here I am. He will be so surprised that I brought him an early present, he loves spontaneity"

"Please don't do this…"

She cut me off before I could finish

"Seriously I've gone through a lot to get here and to get you, don't make this difficult…lets just go" she said this as if we were friends going to the mall or something.

"No" I said firmly, I knew I didn't have a chance at winning in a fight but I sure as hell would try. She would have to try her hardest not to kill me, because she wouldn't want to upset Joham. It was good to know I had that on my side at least.

She smiled "Ok, we can do this the hard way or my way?"

"I'm not going anywhere with you" my tears and fear turned into anger. How dare they just think they can come and ruin my happiness? This wasn't fair this dark cloud that hovered over my family had to go away some day, didn't it?

She sighed heavily and as quickly as I said I wasn't going with her she was in front of me her hand gripping my neck tightly, my feet slightly lifted from the ground. I yanked and scratched at her hand with both of mine; she slowly lifted me higher off the ground by my throat.

"Why must you be so difficult" she said regretfully.

**Chapter 11 Part II Bella POV**

"You know what? I really think running and swimming back would have been faster than this" I was fidgeting with my fingers nerves ran through my body, I hadn't spoken to my daughter in days because of the Volturi and the few times I was able to sneak a call she didn't answer or she couldn't hear me.

"Bella, you're really not that great of a swimmer" Alice countered as she turned behind her seat to look at me. I glowered at her; she shrugged and continued "And besides we will be in Seattle in no time, then you can run the rest way…don't worry I didn't see anything, we have time"

I just looked at Alice and nodded she was right. She knew what to look for and Joham wasn't planning on even being in American for another week.

Edward called my bluff, he knew there was no way I could stay away from Renesmee, these few days killed me.

I was twiddling my fingers absent mindedly when I felt Edward's smooth hand caress my hands.

"Calm down… Renesmee is fine" he whispered, his cool breath blowing my hair out of my face.

"Ok" I breathed; still to this day he was able to make me forget my own name.

"Edward?"

"Hmm" he said his mind obviously else where.

"Is it me or is the plane going extra slow?"

He chuckled and tightened his grip on my hands. "It's definitely just you" he smiled.

"I just miss her so much"

"As do I" he leaned over to kiss my cheek "We are about to land in a few minutes, we will see her within the hour"

I nodded my head. After falling in love with Edward I didn't think I was capable of having any room left in my heart to love anything else to that magnitude, But then Renesmee came along and it wasn't like I had to vacate room to add her, my heart just grew bigger. They are the most important things in my life; my love for them both equal but different on the grand scale.

"Did you ever get a hold of Emmett or Rose?" I asked.

"I'm afraid I ran into the same problem as you did love…too much static"

I sighed.

"I don't understand why they took our phones, it doesn't make any sense" I said angrily

"The Volturi do things sometimes just to do them…because they can."

It was just petty but what did I expect.

"I'm really not looking forward to having them here…" I was speaking more to myself but Edward answered anyways.

"I know…but this is our only option"

I didn't say anything, I'd heard this 'only option' speech too many times over our stay in Volterra but part of me felt like we weren't thinking hard enough like there was something obvious we could do. I was determined to figure it out.

Our private plane was quiet for a moment. When suddenly Edward stiffened beside me, he dropped my hand and stood up storming into the cock pit.

"Edward...?" I yelled out but he was already on the other side of the door.

I stood up and walked around to the empty seat next to Alice and Jasper. I sat down beside her

"Alice, what's going on do you know…" before I could finish I could see it in Alice's eyes, she'd seen something, something that Edward was too afraid to tell me. Panic coursed through my body. Alice's eyes were still in a trance, it was like she completely turned off the outside world.

She ignored my pleading; she ignored Jasper touching her face trying to make her come back to her senses. Esme and Carlisle hovered around waiting for her to come to.

Finally it was like a switch she snapped out of her reverie.

"Alice what is it…is it Renesmee?" I begged

"Yes" she said quickly "the girl…that vampire who I saw with Joham she left Joham she is on her way to La Push right now" Alice's voice was pained and still distant like she was still trying to figure out her vision.

I didn't think I was capable of feeling weak but at this moment I was. I knew if I could cry I would be trembling in sobs.

"Why did she leave?" Jasper and Esme asked at the same time.

Alice shook her head "I think she wants to surprise him by getting Renesmee and bringing her to him…she knew about my visions" Alice said confused "She knew that she had to act on impulse, she knew we would be prepared for a fight if they came next week, so she came on her own"

Edward was walking back, his face every bit of a killer "we are landing in five minutes" he said through his teeth. No one spoke we all focused on Alice.

"Alice when…? When is she coming?" my voice was unsteady.

She looked at me and I knew at the moment we were going to be too late.

"She is on the reservation now…I'm so sorry…I was looking for Joham, I didn't see her leave… she wasn't planning on leaving…she just…"

"Stop" I said my voice louder than I wanted it to be "I mean, it's not your fault Alice"

How I wished I could cry having all of this emotion bottled inside of me weighed me down with literally tons of grief. I stood and before I could turn to walk towards Edward he was by my side, his arm tightly around me. We didn't say a word there was nothing to say.

I dislodged my self from Edward and walked to the cock pit, the pilot looked panicked he was sweating and his heart was hammering so loudly against his rib cage that it was almost hard for me to hear my own thoughts. I wondered what Edward had said to him to get him this shook up.

"Sir" I said. He swallowed loudly

"Yes, ma'am"

"I need a phone, I need a phone now…whether it's your personal cell or the emergency phone that is hidden under your seat…I do not have a preference but I need a phone …now"

The pilot reached into his pocket and pulled out a small black cell phone his hands were shaky as I grabbed it. I'd already had Renesmee's number dialed and the phone to my ear before the pilot even realized the phone was out of his hands. He looked at me with complete horror on his face.

No answer.

I tried Jacob's house. No answer.

I dialed Emmett and the phone started losing signal "Damn it, you're a pilot for God sakes, you should have phone that works when your in a plane" I screamed at the innocent pilot but I didn't have time to care, I was so frustrated I looked out of the window and realized we were only feet away from landing.

"Give me the other phone" I barked

But then Edward was behind me "No time" he grabbed my hand and yanked me out of the cock pit.

"We can get there in 20 minutes" Edward said but I think he was talking to himself.

Not being in time wasn't an option; Joham was not going to get his way. This mystery vampire wasn't going anywhere with my daughter. I'd never been this sure of anything in my life. The wolves were there as well, I had to have that confidence that everything was going to be fine.

As I felt the plane hit the tarmac, the only thing I kept saying to myself was 'It's ok Renesmee we are coming; everything is going to be fine…I promise'


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12 Don't Play with Fire…

I struggled under her massive grip; fortunately I was able to go for long periods of time without breathing. If I were full human I would be unconscious or more than likely dead from a snapped neck or lack of oxygen.

"This is completely your fault you know" she said as if she truly regretted what she was doing. My arms smacked and whaled wildly trying to unclench her hand from around my throat to no avail, my feet dangling frantically in search of the ground that seemed to be moving further and further away; my strength did not compare to that of a vampire of her magnitude.

"You could have just simply walked out of the door, but no…" she continued

As I used every ounce of my strength to loosen her hold; my eye caught the sparkle of my diamond engagement ring. Seeing the ring; embedded the thought in my head that I was not going to let this happen, I was not going to leave Jacob without anyone, I was not going to leave Jacob without me.

If I were to die-selfishly I thought- where ever… it… is that I would go after death I didn't want to be there… not if it meant I couldn't be with Jacob everyday, breathing, feeling, loving him.

She shook her head back and forth "I honestly don't see what he sees in you, but to each his own I guess" she didn't move an inch as if I weren't using all of my might to fight against her.

Suddenly, I dropped to the floor crashing to the wood. Human eyes would not have been able to keep up with the struggle. I could barely see what was going on.

Whoever this 'blur' of a person-a vampire obviously- was, was strong enough to force the mystery vampire to release me.

This mystery vampire was suddenly swung in the air her back smashing into the window, shattering it into millions of pieces. She quickly jumped up to only be thrown out side slamming against a tree.

I got up slowly as I heard the struggle, my eyes trying to focus on who had come and saved me; this person who I now owed everything too. As quickly as I registered his scent I saw his face.

Nahuel

I was in shock; he was half mortal like myself, how was he capable of fighting a full blown vampire. Before I could truly process what I was witnessing, the mystery vampire blazed behind Nahuel grabbing him by his neck, then turning him towards herself. She had a grip on his neck like she had on mine just moments before.

I couldn't bare to watch, my instincts were to go out there to help him. He couldn't get hurt I wouldn't allow it.

"That was very rude of you" she scolded mockingly "…well maybe this will teach you a lesson"

She extended her arm as high as it could possibly go; Nahuel hanging like a rag doll I couldn't watch this she couldn't kill him. She can't.

"No, Nahuel!" I screamed as I ran off the porch "Please don't hurt him please"

The mystery vampire-still holding Nahuel high in the air- looked at me, then back at Nahuel.

"Did she say Nahuel?" she asked him. He didn't respond, he was obviously holding on to whatever air he'd saved in his lungs.

"Well…I guess you win this time, Joham certainly wouldn't let me lay a finger on you" she was highly upset, still holding him in the air. She sighed and then dropped him to the ground. As soon as he hit the ground he ran to me blocking me from her reach.

"Oh, you misunderstood, she still comes with me" she said assuredly.

"Well, then I guess Joham is going to be pretty mad that you killed me because that's the only way you are getting to her" Nahuel hissed, I'd never seen this side of him, it was scary. He was very much a vampire.

The nameless vampire looked at Nahuel. She was definitely contemplating.

"Hmm, I guess I'll take my chances…she… will… be coming with me" as soon as the words left her lips we heard deep growls, so loud they shook the ground. I looked up to see three gigantic wolves slowly moving in closely.

If I am not mistaken I am pretty sure I saw fear glint across the nameless vampires face.

"What the hell is…"

Before she could continue the first wolf-probably Leah- lunged towards the nameless vampire. At that same moment the vampire lurched throwing Leah a few yards.

Before she could regroup the other werewolves-probably Paul and Seth- flew forward one gripping their teeth around her arm. A low menacing hiss escaped her throat.

She was able to maneuver out of the clenched teeth, flipping backwards and before my eyes could register what was happening she was gone.

The wolves stood there, for a quick moment -they stared at me almost apologetic it seemed- before they darted off after her.

"It's ok, it's not your fault…Thank you" I whispered unsteadily; I was sure they didn't hear me. I knew they felt responsible for not being here sooner but they shouldn't feel that way…it wasn't there fault.

The overwhelming feeling of relief and the over abundance of fear that lingered through my body caused me to feel weak.

I breathed in deeply before turning to Nahuel.

I cried into his shoulder, wrapping my arms around his neck and collapsing all of my weight on to him. It felt familiar to be in his arms. Part of me wanted to stay there, to not move an inch from him.

"Thank you" I cried "Thank you"

"Stop" he said softly as he hugged me back

"Nahuel…I …" I didn't know what I wanted to say but whatever it was needed to be said

"Nessie, everything is ok, you don't have to cry" he said as I was still gripped to him

"She is scared of the wolves, she's never seen anything like them before…she won't come back…" his voice wavered at the end; I knew that wasn't the end of that sentence. I pulled my head back from him so I could read his face, and then comprehension slowly settled in.

I remembered what she said about Joham planning on coming next week, how she'd commented on fighting. My mind couldn't wrap around the fact that this would never be over until Joham got what he wanted, which was me.

"She wont come back…alone" I whispered, anger and fear had full possession of my body.

"Yes" Nahuel said calmly "But we will be ready"

He placed both of his hands on either side of my face and a bolt of energy pulsed through me. There was absolutely no way he didn't feel it too.

I let my hands drop to my sides as I peered into his trusting eyes.

"Everything is going to be ok Renesmee…No one…is going to hurt you" his breath tickled my skin as his words had no bearings over me. I just stared in his eyes; the back of my mind wondering what it was that caused me to feel this way around him.

My mind was elsewhere; I felt this uncomfortable indescribable feeling in my chest. Fluttering in my stomach; a certain realization was washing over me. Everything seemed to be blocked out I could only focus on Nahuel.

Before I could stop-before I could realize if I wanted to stop- I leaned in and my lips were softly pressed against Nahuel's.

There was no protagonist or antagonist there was no struggle, just a simple magnet that pulled me towards him.

It was so different yet it felt right; this soft delicate kiss did not need rehearsal or any thought behind it to match its action…it just… was.

It was hard to remember much, it was hard to want to remember much. But as quickly as my impulse allowed me to kiss Nahuel a similar wave of reality swept through me, clearing my mind of all the fog.

Jacob.

I pulled away quickly the look of shock on my face, the feeling of betrayal and disappointment conquering every inch of me.

"Jacob" Nahuel said lowly.

"I'm sorry I…" before I could finish Nahuel shook his head and looked behind me. At that same moment I heard Jacob pulling into the drive. I spun around to see Jacob hopping out of his car, leaving Billy still inside. He ran so quickly that I didn't get a chance to even look back at Nahuel first.

Nahuel just stared, I couldn't read his face, I couldn't detect shock or regret in his features. Though I felt shock and regret within myself. What was I thinking? This whole time I was worried about sending Nahuel the wrong message and I do this? I just stared wide eyed wishing I had the power to reverse time or much simpler have the power to control impulse.

"Nessie" Jacob exhaled as he wrapped me in his arms squeezing me tight.

"Nessie, what…how…Seth said…" he was struggling for words, he'd heard what happened from Seth and he felt responsible, the anger in his eyes was undeniable.

"I'm fine" I interrupted "Jake really" tears still visible on my face

"I knew I should have been here…I'm never leaving …" before Jacob finished his sentence he stopped and stared at Nahuel.

This was the first time Jacob looked at Nahuel and hate didn't glare across his face. Jacob was beyond upset but this time it wasn't because of his dislike for Nahuel

"Nahuel…you saved her…I…" Jacob began

"No need for that" Nahuel said plainly, no emotion in his voice. I couldn't even make eye contact with him... I was such a coward.

There was a long moment of silence, before Jacob turned back towards me. He grabbed both of my hands "I'm so sorry" I could see he was trying to calm himself down, I knew it was taking everything in his being not to go out and find that vampire right at this second.

Jacob slowly lifted my left hand and kissed it, and at the same time I heard Nahuel breathe in a slight gust of air as if he were in shock. I finally looked at him to see pure pain riddled on his face.

"I have to go" Nahuel said abruptly; then I realized what was wrong. He saw a flawlessly beautiful diamond ring glistening from my ring finger. I snatched my hand from Jacobs hold in an attempt to explain…I didn't know how and what I was going to explain but he couldn't just walk away

"Nahuel wait!" I yelled as he stormed by me, he moved too quickly for me to try and grab his arm like I attended to. If I had been able to stop him I didn't know what I would say with Jacob standing right there.

"Nahuel" I screamed again but he was gone, I just stared; a tear slowly falling down my cheek. It took a moment for me to realize that I hadn't moved, I felt sick that I was capable of hurting so many people that I cared about all at the same time.

I finally turned around to see Jacob standing there as still as a statue, his face was covered in anger, concern and pain.

"What was that about" he asked; his voice low and unsteady. Jacob sensed it, Jacob saw it, Jacob knew at that moment how strong my feelings were for Nahuel.

"Jacob I…" before I could continue I heard my name I turned around quickly at the sound of that voice, that voice had been the voice I was waiting to hear for so long.

"Mom…Dad" I cried out, at the same moment I was buried in my mothers arms, my tears drenching her shirt.

My eyes were closed; I just wanted to block out everything and just savior this moment.

I felt ice cool lips press against my forehead "Sweetheart" I heard my father say. This was my normal; this is what had to be a constant in my life.

"Baby…" for a second I thought my mother was crying; if that was only possible.

Everything was a blur of happiness and reconciliation.

For nearly ten hours my mother and father, grandparents, uncles and aunts, Seth and Paul all discussed what had happened over these last days, the Volturi, all of Aunt Alice's visions, Joham, this new nameless vampire…everything. We were all on the same page now.

Jacob had left out with Leah for a while before they both came in. Anger was plastered blatantly on Jacob's face; he didn't say much nor did I. We didn't even make eye contact, I felt so detached I wanted to run over to him and force him to believe that I didn't have feelings for Nahuel, but I would be lying through my teeth.

What had I done? I never thought I would be capable of hurting Jacob like this but I had. He was mad at what he thought …could…happen not knowing what had actually happened.

I needed to tell him the truth he deserved that much from me. I felt worthless at this point like I didn't deserve him or Nahuel, or this family or anything for the matter. My existence was hindering everyone's lives and it wasn't fair.

"We couldn't smell her, she didn't smell like a vampire…it's like she was able to conceal her scent" Seth said

"I never heard of anything like it" grandpa Carlisle said looking puzzled.

"A vampire can cover their scent? I didn't think that was possible" my mother quizzed.

"She is not your typical vampire" Alice chimed in "I don't get her, I don't see how she has so many abilities and is still so young"

"Well we do know one thing" my father interjected "She is apparently terrified of wolves"

Paul punched Seth in the shoulder "Who wouldn't be" he joked

"But we are lucky Nahuel came when he did though" grandma Esme said softly.

And I froze, hearing Nahuel's name brought back that kiss, that feeling I had when I was with him and then the sudden regret and betrayal that was taking over my senses. My father's eyes darted to me as he read my thoughts…the thoughts that I had been so carefully concealing until now.

We held eye contact for a moment as he saw –almost everything; I still had control over not thinking about me and Jacobs's engagement-everything that transpired right before they came. I was ashamed and embarrassed so I didn't try to hide my kiss with Nahuel, I deserved to feel this way, and it wasn't enough punishment.

"Where is Nahuel?" my mom directed towards me

"Umm, I…"

"Bella, I think we should all go to the main house" my father interrupted, I looked at him appreciatively.

After a moment of hugs and kisses and my mother arguing with my father that I should come along with them-claiming it was for my protection when in all actuality it was because it was too hard to leave me so quickly after coming back- It was Jacob and I sitting in my living room.

Complete silence.

"Jacob" I said lowly. He didn't respond

"I know that you are upset with me but before…"

"You know what Nessie, I was going to try… but I don't want to hear it" I thought I heard and seen it all but this was the most upset I'd ever seen him. How was I going to tell him about the kiss if he was already this mad?

"Ok, I understand but …"

"Ness, you don't get it"

I looked at him confused; we'd gotten into arguments before but this felt different this felt like the winner of the argument was already declared.

"How about I make it easier for you" he pressed "Just show me you kissing Nahuel so you can clear your conscience" he snapped

I froze, I knew in just moments everything I was dreading was going to happen

"If you want to show me, I mean everything is so that you feel better, so that you can live with yourself right?" his voice was scary I wanted to be invisible at this moment.

"Jacob what happened…" I began to say as the tears rimmed out of my eyes; but he interrupted me

"Leah already told me everything…does that ring mean anything to you?" his voice was almost booming through the house.

"Jake" I said through tears "I'm sorry…"

"You're sorry…Nessie you are always sorry" he stood up "It's not that easy anymore"

I stood up beside him; I felt like a frightened child, I wanted to cower in a corner somewhere. But Jacob was right, I was always hurting him and expecting 'sorry' to be enough.

"I can't even look at you right now" he said painfully, his eyes close to producing tears

"You know how hard it is to not want to be around you Nessie? It kills me to go but now its killing me to stay…you don't realize the hold you have on me, the love I have for you…you just walk all over it"

His words cut me like the sharpest of knives, It was hard to argue how much I truly loved him after looking at what I did, but he couldn't truly think I didn't love him he couldn't honestly think I could… be, breathe survive without him.

"No Jacob, listen…"

"You keep pushing me away…pushing and pushing Nessie. If I have to hurt myself and go against nature to give you what you obviously want, then I will"

I didn't understand what he was saying; his eyes fell to the ring on my finger.

"I won't ever be far, you don't have to be scared you're always going to be protected but …this…I can't do, not now"

"Wait, Jacob…what?" what he was saying was starting to set in.

"You can…" he stopped and took a deep breath before continuing "…you can keep the ring"

And then he was gone. I heard a loud crash that was obviously Jacob phasing.

At the moment I thought I would die, my heart was literally ripped out of my chest. I would not let reality set in. Jacob did not leave me, this engagement wasn't off I was repeating this in my head as I stood there sobbing.

I couldn't move I couldn't speak; I let him walk out of my future. I hurt him to a point of no return.

I felt empty in a literal sense, I felt like there wasn't enough air in the room. I was dizzy and hot; my heart pounding against my ribs erratically.

"Jacob" I cried out loudly I knew in my mind he wasn't coming back, not for the reasons I wanted but I still called out for him as tears flew rapidly down my cheeks.

"Jacob…please" my voice was strained, my voice wasn't mine; my voice belonged to desperation.

"I'm so sorry, please Jacob…please" I sobbed not moving one inch from where I was standing.

I don't know how long I stood there, but finally my limbs grew weak from grief, I sucked in quick gusts of air; I believe I was beginning to hyperventilate. Everything around me didn't exist. The house and the rooms didn't exist, the sky and the moon didn't exist, without Jacob everything was a cloud of black smoke, without Jacob nothing had meaning.

Without Jacob I didn't have meaning…I didn't exist.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13 Vacant

Time was dispensable; I had no recollection of how many ticks clicked by on the clock as I just laid there in my bed incapable of moving.

I didn't care that the Volturi would be here soon to help fight against Joham; a vampire who wanted to use me as a mating mechanism or that a powerful vampire -whose name I didn't care to listen to when grandpa Carlisle discovered what it was- who had come to kidnap me and had no remorse for snatching me from my family.

I didn't care that danger surrounded me in every corner of my life, the only thing that was resolute was the look on Jacobs face, what I had done to him, how I'd betrayed him.

Every time I let myself think too much about him, I felt sick…I felt hallow, empty, blank.

Vacant

I hadn't left my room in days, there was no need to. Anything beyond my room held no importance to me if Jacob wasn't apart of my life.

I hadn't seen or heard from Jacob in a week. I couldn't fathom being apart from him for mere hours, this was pure agony. As I searched for the right words to describe how I felt, I only then noticed my mother standing in my door way peering in looking at me. I hadn't even noticed she'd opened the door.

Her face seemed anxious as she watched me lay there unattached.

"Renesmee" she finally spoke lowly. This was her second time today trying to get me to talk, trying to get me to let her in, trying to make me part of this world again, trying to get me to be human again.

The only time in the last week I showed any signs of life was when Aunt Alice had her vision of Joham postponing his "visit" here for another week, so the Volturi wouldn't be coming until next week now. Oh the joy, I get one more week of not being kidnapped and raped…my sarcasm was morose but not much made me care about anything now.

"Ok" my mother said as she walked in standing at the foot of my bed "I know you are hurt, but you have to talk about it" she pleaded.

I just laid there starring at the window, the back of my mind hoping Jacob would appear and everything would be like it once was, like I hadn't purposely ruined my life and Jacobs.

My mother sighed as she sat on my bed behind me; I felt her hand massaging my back. A tear streamed down my cheek.

"I spoke with Jacob" she said lowly. Immediately I wanted to ask, how he was doing, ask if he asked about me, ask if she thought he would ever forgive me. But I didn't, I couldn't allow myself to get my hopes up, I wouldn't allow myself to think he would even want to hear from me let alone forgive me.

My mother ignored my oblivion and continued to speak.

"I'm sorry but I was honest with him I told him that you were not doing well" she paused when she felt my body stiffen. "…and I'm going to be honest with you… he isn't doing well either" her voice was low almost a whisper.

Of course pain pierced through my body, knowing that Jacob was in any type of distress killed me, but knowing his distress was caused by me literally made me feel like the lowest of creodonts on this earth.

My mother sat there silently…it felt as if she were finally accepting my silence. A part of me felt horrible, I wasn't only hurting Jacob but I was hurting my entire family as well. I hadn't seen them in days when they were in Italy, they finally come back and I am locked away in my room loathing myself not speaking a word.

I had to let my mother know, that I missed her and that I was sorry that I hadn't been…there…in the last few days but verbalizing it seemed nearly impossible.

I slowly but surely rolled over until I was completely faced my mother, her eyes were wide and beautiful. It was the first time in a week I'd actually looked at something other than my window. It was the first time I acknowledged someone since Jacob… walked away from me.

I slowly placed my hand on top of my mother's hand. I showed her how deeply and truly I missed her. I showed her how completely broken my heart was, I showed her how everything was my fault I showed her how I kept pushing and pushing Jacob away-words that he'd used-I showed her the kiss…even though I knew my father more than likely already told her.

Every glimpse was shaded with dark colors, emptied meanings, and dissolute surroundings. I wasn't sure of the extent of what my mother knew, so I showed her the last time I'd seen Jacob…the argument, the pain in his eyes, the hurt written on his face.

Then my mother finally gasped.

Her hand was suddenly reaching for my left hand as she spoke.

"Renesmee, this…this is an engagement ring?" shock owned her voice. I knew I didn't edit out when Jacob asked me 'does that ring mean anything to you?' and when he said those final words to me 'You can keep the ring'. It didn't matter now anyways; I'd run him away.

"I know you are hurt but, what are you thinking getting married at 17 years old Renesmee?" I could tell she was trying to hold back how truly angry she was on account of my current state of mind but I could still see the anger flare as she examined my ring.

"We're …not… getting married" I replied sourly, my voice was low and raspy. It was the first words I'd said in days and probably some of the hardest words I would say. My mother had the look of shock on her face when she heard me finally speak.

"We're not getting married because of me" I blurted out "… I ruined my happiness, I ruined his happiness. We're not getting married because Jacob walked out on me, we're not getting married because I ran him off, he doesn't love me anymore and it's my fault…" I was ranting and crying uncontrollably. Everything I was holding in was finally spilling to the surface.

"Jacob does love you… don't you ever doubt that" My mother wrapped her arms around me rocking me back and forth

"Shhh…Shhh…Sweetie just breathe…everything is ok"

I just wept in her arms, for the first time reality was setting in. Jacob was gone.

I wasn't sure how much time passed before I finally spoke again.

"Thank you" my voice shaky "I'm sorry"

"Don't apologize" my mother said simply, still rocking me.

"I'm sorry for not telling you about the engagement" I struggled to find my voice. My mother didn't say a word.

"You said Jacob wasn't doing too well…" I paused, fumbling over his name a little; it was hard for me to say aloud "How…I mean did he say…"

"Yes he asked about you. Renesmee there is no point in sugar coating things…he is hurt but I think he just needs time"

I found hope in her words, the emotions I did not want to surface…did. Her words indicated that in time he would be back that he would forgive me. I didn't want my mind to wonder like this. But my mother was his best friend she would know …right?

"Ok" was all I could manage to say.

"And Renesmee…"

I looked at her waiting for the next half of her sentence.

"Nahuel, has come over a couple of times"

When I heard his name a twinge of anger flowed through me. I knew it wasn't his fault, I had been the one to kiss him but I hated him right now.

I hated Nahuel for making me feel this way about him, I hated that after everything I still missed him. I hated the confusing spell he had over me, it had ruined my life.

"I don't want to see him"

"He is worried about you Renesmee… I know the circumstances are bad but he is your friend…"

"Was…my friend" I corrected.

She breathed in and continued talking as if I hadn't interrupted her.

"I'm not going to force anything on you…but trust me; this attraction is not going to go away unless you two are on the same page."

I wondered if this was the same way my mother felt when she chose my father. How hard was it to embrace one and let go of the other when both were so important to you?

The only difference in my situation was that the one I wanted to embrace… didn't want me.

"I don't have anything to say to him" my voice was barely a whisper.

"Yes you do"

I looked at her, she was certain. I pictured in my mind what I would say if Nahuel were in this room. My feelings for him battled against my longing for Jacob. There was no comparison but it was hard to ignore the annoying piece of my mind that wondered about Nahuel.

After everything that transpired I still was curious about Nahuel, curious as to why I could feel so strongly for someone I barely knew.

At that moment my door opened slowly.

"Alice maybe you should come back later she…"

"It's important Bella" Alice interrupted. In a flash she was sitting on the opposite side of me. Her face wasn't easy to read.

My mom knew Alice so well "You had another vision Alice?" I could tell she was trying to conceal the panic in her voice.

"Yes" she nodded "But not about Joham"

"Then who…?" my mother countered.

"Jacob" she said as her eyes shot towards me.

I sat up quickly ignoring my achy body. I felt like I would lose my mind, if Alice had seen Jacob getting hurt or leaving or…

"What Aunt Alice what's wrong with Jacob? What did you see?" my voice was frantic and uncontrolled.

"He thinks that it's a trick" she started off we looked at her confused "He thinks that Joham purposely decided to postpone his arrival, to throw us off"

"Serina reported back that she was able to get to you because of making a snap decision" she continued

Serina had been the mystery vampire's name.

"Ok…?" I quizzed.

Aunt Alice looked at me intently before speaking.

"After Serina's reaction to the wolves...he wants to beat them to the punch"

"Beat them to the punch? What do you mean?" I asked confused

"He wants to go to Africa with the pack and take on Joham and Serina"

I was floored, how stupid could he be? Why would he risk everything for me? How could he risk his life for someone who had handled his heart so carelessly?

"No…he can't! Is he crazy? Is he even thinking about the army? How…"

"I know Nessie" she said.

My mother held my hand as she spoke to Aunt Alice, "Well what exactly did you see?"

"He is planning on leaving in two days"

"Wait" I said abruptly. I said nothing else; I had nothing else to say.

I just needed time to stop indefinitely. I needed for all to be still. I had to see Jacob, whether he listened to me or not. Whether he tried to ignore me and send me away. I had to stop him; I couldn't let him jeopardize everything for me. I wasn't worth it.

"How were you able to see Jacob?" my mother asked Aunt Alice. It's always been hard for her to see any of the wolf pack. It's gotten better over the years but always fuzzy, never concrete visions.

"I don't know…I think I'm just getting use to them always being around, this was so clear though. I'm sure they are planning on leaving"

Without any warning, I was immediately off of my bed. In my drawer grabbing the first pair of jeans I found.

"Renesmee, what are you doing?" my mother quizzed.

"He's not going" was all I said. That was the only explanation I would give. I didn't need another.

Before she could stop me I was out of my window and half way to La Push. I was faster than my mother so I knew there was no chance she could stop me. My father was at the main house so by time she told him to get me I would hopefully already be at La Push.

I knew they had nothing to worry about, even though Jacob couldn't stand to be near me he had ordered 9 of the new pack members to patrol my house all the way down to La Push.

I was not supposed to leave my home especially alone. But I wouldn't stand idle while Jacob made the dumbest decision of his life.

As I rounded the corner, I saw Jacob's house. I was nervous; I was running on pure adrenalin I hadn't thought about what I would say. I didn't think my heart was capable of seeing him walk away from me again. If he rejected me or if he wouldn't give me a chance to speak, I wouldn't be able to handle it, a lump grew in my throat.

I was finally on the reservation, as I approached Jacob's house I saw two huge wolves in his front yard. One who was obviously Leah was lying on the ground; even through her fur and muzzle I could tell she looked annoyed and bored.

When Jacob left, I blamed Leah at first. She had been the one to tell him that I'd kissed Nahuel. I was so upset and so pain stricken that I never wanted to see her again. I even envisioned causing her bodily harm. But I then realized no one was to blame but myself. I was wrong, I had betrayed Jacob I was the only person that should be held responsible. I couldn't judge Leah for looking for a friend.

I slowed down walking at human pace, when the wolf that was standing; paced back and forth. He was obviously Jacob.

My heart literally stopped, then picked up at a faster pace. It was the first time I'd seen him. Even though he was in wolf form, it still caused me to feel elated. Simply stating how much I missed him would be an understatement. I wanted to run to him and wrap my arms around his fur.

I wanted to divert to the past, when Jacob and were just best friends, when we didn't have a care in the world. I wanted to go back to a time when my hearts strings were not tugged at the sight of him, when things were not complicated, when love wasn't dangerous and hazardous to my health.

Leah looked up quickly and I froze, she'd spotted me out. Jacob slowly turned to my direction; then looked down at Leah.

It seemed as if she sighed in boredom, she got up ran to the woods. She was quickly out of sight.

I just stood there yards away from Jacob, as he stood gawking back at me. I took in a deep breath of air. I slowly inched closer and closer to him. I was scared that any sudden movement would make him realize that he couldn't be near me and he would just walk away. Leaving me there alone…again.

I had to think past the problems we were having now, I had to think past everything and focus on the fact that my mission was to make sure he didn't leave.

I was finally standing close enough to touch him, but I didn't, even though I wanted to so badly.

I gathered my thoughts before I spoke. I came to the rationalization that it was good that Jacob was in his wolf form. It would give me a chance to talk, without being interrupted. I harped over the fact that I didn't fight for him when he was leaving, that I just stood there and let him control that conversation. I was weak, but I needed to be strong and completely sure of myself.

"Jacob" my voice cracked. Just simply saying his name I thought I would burst into tears. Why couldn't I just erase everything, why couldn't it all just go away?

"Alice saw you…and the pack going to Africa" my voice was sheepish and low, once again the embodiment of a frightened child.

He growled lowly, not with anger but of annoyance. I continued on.

"You can't do that Jacob, I can't let you…" I stopped myself I realized that I had no right to say "let" him… he didn't belong to me anymore, I didn't belong to him anymore.

"Jacob…just please. I know you are doing this for my family but I don't deserve this. You broke up with" I corrected myself "we are broken up. You don't owe me anything"

Now the low growl that was annoyed was definitely angered. His eyes said it all. He hunched on his legs and before I knew it he was gone, running away to the woods.

My heart sank. It had happened, what I was afraid of. He didn't want to hear me or see me. He left me there alone again. I stood there as a single tear streamed down my face.

I wiped it away, and breathed in, I couldn't cry over him forever…could I? I thought to myself.

I turned around to walk away, at a human pace. Though he didn't love me anymore, I still loved him, I wasn't going to give up on stopping him from going to Africa, I would have my whole family lobbying for him and the pack to stay. I wouldn't come back to La Push because that is what he wants but I would not allow him to fight a winless war to protect me.

The wind was starting to pick up as I was almost to the trail.

"Nessie"

That too familiar husky voice called out. Before I turned around I stopped, elation swam through me momentarily, I exhaled and turned slowly.

There he was, Jacob…standing there in only ripped jean shorts.

We walked towards each other meeting half way.

We didn't speak; we just stared at each other. He was so beautiful, almost godly like it was as if I'd never seen him before. His face was set seriously as he looked back into my eyes.

At this moment I wished I was my father, I would have given anything to read his mind at this moment. I could not read his face. I decided I would be the one to speak first.

"Hey" was all I said.

"Hey" he repeated in the same monotone.

Another moment of silence drifted before he spoke again.

"I'm not going to Africa for your family's sake" Jacob said angrily. I just watched and listened I wanted to absorb as much of his voice as I could before he walked away again.

"Any and everything I do is for you Nessie. That's exactly the problem…you don't get that" he shook his head, I could see that the pain was still fresh in his heart.

"I don't understand why you would still…after I…" I didn't finish

"What…? Do you think I don't love you anymore?" his voice was stunned.

I looked at him perplexed; that was exactly what I thought. How could he love me after all I've put him through?

"I can't believe you even think it's possible for me not to love you" he stepped in closer "Nessie I don't know how to …not…love you"

I didn't say anything, I needed to hear this. I knew it didn't change the fact that we were not together but knowing that his love for me was still there lingering was enough to try and…let go. The thought of 'letting go' of Jacob didn't seem realistic in my world, but I would if it meant he could be happy. I'd forfeit my happiness for his happiness freely.

I couldn't just stand there silent; I had to tell him I was sorry, I had to try to get as many words in as I could before he decided he'd heard enough.

"Jacob, I'm sorry. I love you so much." I rambled as my words rushed together. "I know I've hurt you in ways that I can't take back and I know it's too late. But you have to know that you will always be the most important person in life. And I will never love anyone the way…"

I was silenced when Jacobs's lips crashed into mine. His hands were in my hair as his lips -almost violently- moved in a rhythmic motion against mine. I kissed him back vigorously. I didn't move my hands; I didn't move anything I was in shock.

An electric current flowed through my limbs as I succumbed to my personal heaven. Never more than this moment did I realize how much I needed Jacob to survive, how much I needed him to be…human again.

The air smelled different fresh, the wind felt crisp and brisk, my heart danced along with the humming of the birds. His skin on my skin sent life through me…life that had been missing in the days Jacob was gone.

Jacob pulled his lips from mine, his hands still on the sides of my face.

"Really listen to me, I need you to really understand these words…I love you Nessie" he was intent on my eyes as he emphasized 'I love you'… "Don't ever think differently. No matter what happens"

I nodded, as I breathed him in.

Purpose and meaning were back; with vivid color, the dissolute surroundings were now painted portraits of happiness filled with music and joy. I was existent, I was here, I was human again. I wasn't an empty morsel anymore.

I was no longer vacant.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14 Or So I Thought

Everything that I'd hoped for was coming true. Nothing could ruin this moment. Coming here was the smartest thing I'd done in a while. My happiness could finally begin again.

After Jacob slowly kissed me again, he pulled his lips away. He was staring down at me.

I wanted to wrap myself in his arms and finally move past this bump we had in the road. But he stood there guarded; his eyes didn't match his actions.

"I'm sorry" he whispered.

"Sorry for what?" I quizzed; I went to grab his hand but he pulled it away placing it in his pocket.

"I shouldn't have kissed you"

I looked at him, knowing at that moment what was going on. It wasn't over; this was never going to be over. He wasn't past it. What kind of sick game was he playing? Was this some type of payback for what I did? This was low; Jacob would never hurt me like this.

"But Jacob I …"

"This was my fault" he interrupted sounding ashamed of himself

"What does this mean?" I asked confused but already knowing the answer subconsciously.

"It means I have lack of self control when I am around you" he spat out angrily; I could tell he was angry with himself more than he was angry with me. "You shouldn't have come here Nessie…just go home please"

I couldn't believe what he was saying. I'd finally gone that extra mile, I'd finally allowed myself to think that Jacob and I could move on and forget about what I'd done but I was all wrong.

I should have known by how he kissed me that something wasn't right. It was too forced-though not premeditated- it was intense, but not in a good sense it was intense like…like it was the last time we would ever kiss.

At that thought my tears finally brimmed over. I couldn't blame him for having a brief lapse in self control. I knew how hard it was for us to be apart especially when it's forced. Jacob was right I shouldn't have come here, there was a reason he was keeping his distance and by me being here just made it that much harder.

"Nessie… I really am sorry; I shouldn't have led you to believe that I was ready to…" he paused. "You just need to know that I love you…that's never going to change, I'm just not ready to…"

"No…I know…I shouldn't have come here" I choked out over my tears.

We stood there for a moment; I just stared hoping to embed his face permanently in my mind. I didn't know the next time I would see him.

"Bye Nessie" Jacob leaned into hug me. I breathed him in, hoping to have his scent always in my memory-How couldn't I? We embraced longer than the average hug before he let go to walk away.

I stood there, belittling myself in my mind. How stupid was I? Why did I come here I knew he needed time, I knew there was a chance he would reject me. But I came here anyway.

Then everything came back to me, I'd been so distracted I never really discussed what I wanted to. Jacob was about to round the corner into his garage.

"Wait Jacob" I yelled out. He stopped his back still towards me.

"Nessie…please don't do this. You're just going to make it harder on both of us" he replied solemnly his back still faced me.

"No…Jake that's not what I mean" I yelled in that same motion I ran to him.

He slowly turned around, his face looked pained. Like he was going to cry, my heart sank, I was causing this. I had to focus; I had to ignore that feeling inside of me that wanted to hold him until I could make him forget everything.

"Jake" I said ignoring that twinge of fear and guilt "About you going to Africa…"

"Nessie"

"Let me talk…please" I interrupted "You can't go…it doesn't make sense"

I waited for him to interrupt but he didn't. So I continued.

"The Volturi will be here next week…and if Serina is so afraid of wolves you could do that here not half way around the world"

"You don't understand" he said as he turned to walk away.

"Then make me understand" I said as I grabbed his arm. He stopped; taking in a deep breath.

"You want to know the truth? I'm tired of just anybody coming to where we live trying to change things…interfering with our lives. For once I am going to control things" his voice full of anger.

I felt like he was talking about way more than just Joham. But I wouldn't dare bring it up.

"Jake…Please. I know you don't owe me anything but please. I can't and I won't let you…I'm sorry"

I knew I struck a cord with him.

"Nessie this isn't up for discussion"

"Jake, if you do this, I'll have to just put matters in my own hands" I didn't know what I was saying. Once again I was speaking with no thought process before hand.

"Matters in your own hands?"

"I'm just saying that if you want to be negligent of your life and well being I could always do the same"

We stared at each other, he was fuming and I was appeased that I got his attention.

Of course my threat had no merit. I didn't know what I was saying.

"You have finally done it…you are officially crazy" he said snidely

"I have reason to be crazy" I countered

There was a moment of silence before Jacob turned his head towards the woods. Another moment past then he looked back at me and sighed.

"Can we talk about this later?" he asked distracted.

"When is later?" I asked. He just looked at me. I think at that very moment he was deciding whether he would actually talk to me later or not.

"I'll come over tonight" he promised. My heart fluttered at that. Knowing that I would see him again so soon; seeing that he was so willing to come to my house, it was hard to contain my little glimpse of joy he'd just given me.

"Ok" was all I could say.

Jacob wasn't ready to forgive me. But I could see in his eyes that he understood how hard it was to be apart. I would gladly take this small part of Jacob, this Jacob who wasn't fully there, this Jacob who was guarded…I would take this Jacob over not seeing or being near Jacob at all any day.

"You should go" he urged. I nodded, but my feet didn't move. I felt like I should hug him again; I felt like I couldn't leave without saying or doing something.

"Jake" I began but his facial expression already looked pained and anxious. He was going through enough, I didn't want to make it worse by saying something that could cause our not being together to make him suffer any more than he already was. "I'll see you tonight…8pm?" is what I decided to say.

He nodded. And that was that. I slowly turned around; I could feel his eyes on my back as I walked away.

I half expected him to stop me, for him to say he couldn't do it anymore, that he forgave me. But it was just some unrealistic part of my mind that wanted to ignore actuality.

I thought about how happy we were, and how complete I felt with him. I thought about how when I was with him I didn't think about anything else. Jacob was more than my back bone; he was my oxygen, my heart beat, the most instrumental part of my life from day one.

Walking at a human pace I was finally out of Jacobs's sight; I was half way to my home when I broke down. I fell to the dirt covered forest bed. I released all the bottled up anger and frustration and confusion and longing…and tears that I was so desperately trying to hold back. How many tears could I let go of over him, I knew I was bringing him pain but did he care what he was doing to me?

I'd done wrong; I accepted and admitted that but people have been forgiven for worse offenses. Why was he torturing me, why was he torturing himself? I saw his eyes, I heard his heart this was eating away at him and he was causing it.

"Nessie…?" an unfortunate familiar voice asked. I couldn't believe it, I needed to be alone. Why was he here, why was he always showing up at the worst of times…except for one time of course…

"Go away" I said as I stared at the ground not making eye contact.

"Why are you out here? Why are you by yourself? Why are you crying?"

"Nahuel why are you asking so many questions…?" I snapped as I wiped away one of many tears that were a continuum down my streaked cheeks.

He sat down beside me, and didn't say a single word. He just sat there as I didn't acknowledge him. He was definitely the last person I needed to see, he was the last person I wanted to see.

"Why are you here?" I asked as I stood up still avoiding eye contact.

"I asked you first"

I glared at him finally making eye contact; I wasn't in the mood for care free banter.

"I was on my way to your house actually" Nahuel replied as he stood up. "I've been trying to check on you…but your mom said…"

"There is a reason why I didn't want to see you Nahuel" I interrupted; my voice was full of anger.

He just looked at me; before I spoke again.

"We can't be friends; I've lost everything because of you. Jacob found out about the kiss…" fresh tears streamed down my cheeks "…forget it, the point is I can't be around you…I've lost too much…I'm losing too much…"

"Nessie" he interrupted "If he loves you like he says he does…he wouldn't be doing this to you"

"Nahuel you don't know…"

"No…I do know…its ok for you to be sitting here crying over him? Will he even give you the time of day? Does he even think you are worth the time of day?" Nahuel spat out.

"Apparently not" he continued "Do the math Nessie. You want him… he doesn't want you. I want…" he paused "…you, Nessie I love you…and you fight it, you won't even acknowledge it"

I couldn't listen to what he was saying, I wouldn't allow myself to.

"Why is it ok to be in love with Jacob…but it's not ok to even accept how you feel about me?" he repositioned himself until he was standing in front of me "You can lie to me…you can lie to Jacob and your mom…whoever, but you can't lie to yourself"

It was quiet for a moment, what he was saying was seeping in. Fighting the feelings I had for Nahuel were making me weak my guard was slowly slipping.

"Can I ask you something?" Nahuel asked; his tone was calmer now. I just looked at him he spoke anyway.

"That day…if I would have come to your house just hours earlier…before you knew Jacob imprinted on you would things be different now? If I told you how I felt…and you went with our 'connection' before you knew about Jacob, how would things stand right now?"

I paused. How was I supposed to answer that question? First off its imprinting; a timeline wouldn't change how I feel about Jacob and most importantly it didn't matter I couldn't change what happened first and what happened second. I think Nahuel mistook my silence for doubt or confusion.

"That's what I thought" he whispered. And slowly he leaned his lips in towards mine. I had a slight moment of indecision, whether I would succumb to the kiss. And at that moment I realized Nahuel was right I did have feelings for him, I was attracted to him, I did love him too.

But… I loved Jacob more, my feelings for Jacob were stronger, my longing for Jacob made me sick to my stomach, I needed him, Jacob was my sole meaning of survival. I would never ever betray him again I would never treat him like he was second rate. Even if Jacob didn't want me…I would never be with anyone else unless it was him.

I pulled back preparing to tell Nahuel all of this but at that same time I went to speak, I heard a booming voice only meters away call out to me.

"Nessie get out of the way now" the voice seethed

"Jacob" I yelled stunned; he didn't sound like himself. And he looked like the Jacob I didn't like to be around. My heart sped I knew this look, he was trembling, heat was radiating off of his body, his teeth were clenched as they peered evilly through his lips. He was going to phase.

"Jake please don't…please calm down" I screamed my voice straining against my nerves.

"Move Nessie…Now" he demanded.

In the corner of my eye I could see Nahuel, he wasn't afraid; he wasn't going to back down. He was preparing to fight. His eyes looked as if he wanted to fight Jacob.

"Stop this now" I screeched; at that moment I decided I wasn't going to move, if they were going to fight they would have to do it with me in the middle. I jumped in between them, my back towards Nahuel and my eyes dead locked on Jacobs's eyes. His focus was solely on Nahuel not acknowledging me at all.

"Jacob lets go…come on" I walked towards him

"This is the last time I'm going to ask you Nessie…please." Jacob's voice was acid. He wasn't going to back down, but neither was I.

"No" I replied and before I knew it Nahuel had his hands gripped on both sides of my shoulders tossing me out of the way. I hit the dirt lightly a few feet away.

"Don't you touch her" Jacob boomed. Then everything happened so quickly, I heard a loud crash, as soon as I lifted my head from the ground I saw a gigantic wolf lunging for Nahuel.

"Please …No" I screamed my voice cracked and shaky carrying along with the tears.

Jacob clawed at Nahuel, causing Nahuel to fly back in to a tree. Chards of wood scattered everywhere. Nahuel flipped backwards and ended up behind Jacob grabbing Jacob by his hind leg and throwing him.

"No…Nahuel stop" my yelling was useless over the loud booming and even if they did hear me it wouldn't mean much.

My mind couldn't focus on one thing, this could not be happening. It needed to end, should I run to my house and get my family, will the other wolves come and help. How long would this last. All of this was my fault.

Suddenly my mind shifted to what Nahuel said to me when he'd first come here. We were sitting in my kitchen and he said_ "I would act the same way if I were in his position. Girl's like you are hard to come by, so if you have to fight to keep them then fighting to death is the only option"_

My heart sank; he couldn't mean that in a literal sense. I blocked out everything, only blurs of the struggle was evident in my sight.

"No…please…no" I exhaled.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15 Time is of the Essence

I jumped up, my hand braced on the charm bracelet Jacob had given me all those years ago; it always seemed to calm me down.

I heard low reverberating growls from behind me and there stood three huge wolves. I turned back suddenly; Nahuel didn't deserve to die, he couldn't help how he felt for me. There was no way he was going to survive this.

But to my surprise the wolves stood there, as if they were observing Jacob trying to make sure nothing went too far. They were not going to join in the fight -thank God- but wouldn't they try and stop it? I looked at the wolves anxiously as I heard cracking and shuffling, I turned to see Jacob's huge muzzle clamp down on the side of Nahuel's leg. A large snapping sound creaked through the woods.

I gasped as Nahuel fell to the ground. I didn't want Jacob to lose this fight but I didn't want Nahuel to be hurt.

I looked back at the wolves and to me they looked entertained I only recognized one of the wolves. I needed them to help.

"Leah…please do something" I pleaded. She just looked at me not acknowledging my words. "I know you don't owe me anything but Leah please…they are going to kill each other" I begged. She looked at me and snorted, obviously she didn't think there was anyway Nahuel could kill Jacob, she obviously didn't care what happened to Nahuel.

At that moment I realized the only way this was going to stop was if I did something to stop it.

I turned back to the fight to see Nahuel grab Jacob and throw him violently against the bark of a tree- what was left of the bark that hadn't already been destroyed in the fight.

That was all I needed to see at that point, this couldn't continue…especially not over me.

I took in a deep breath, and clenched my charm even tighter. And before I knew it I was standing right in the middle of the 'war zone'. I hadn't realized that my eyes were closed, until Jacob's growl roaring angrily startled my eyes open. I opened my eyes to see Jacob lunging at me. He was obviously in the midst of lunging at Nahuel but I interfered.

Jacob was trying to stop as quickly as he could, his front legs digging into the dirt as he desperately tried to avoid me. He was coming at me so fast, I clenched the charm my eyes shutting again…I wasn't moving, I wasn't worth being fought over and in Jacob's defense there was nothing to fight over. Jacob already had full possession of my heart; there wasn't a competition, just a short glitch in my mind that thought it could deny how I truly felt.

I knew Jacob's momentum was too fast, everything was happening quickly. I knew it wouldn't be on purpose but Jacob wasn't going to be able to stop fast enough. He was going to ram into me and after that I don't know what was going to happen. But they both needed to realize that I wasn't going to stand there and watch them kill each other.

Suddenly I was yanked by my forearm too quickly to even comprehend the movement. The hand was ice cold, so it wasn't Nahuel who moved me this time. My eyes opened slowly and I saw my mothers face.

"M…mom…?" I asked confused. She didn't answer; she was already back to where the fight was, along with my father and my Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett. She'd pulled me a few yards away.

Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett had Nahuel by the arms as he struggled against them and the wolves were finally surrounding Jacob. My father stood in the middle beside my mother as she stared at Jacob dead in the eyes as he seethed almost withering in angst.

"Jacob" she said calmly "Look at me" she struggled to get him to focus but he finally did.

"Your fighting over nothing…this doesn't solve anything ok, let's just go home and we can all discuss everything" she continued.

Jacob growled, it was so deep I could feel it in my chest. I winced at how much anger just oozed off of him even in his wolf form.

My mother turned to my father to translate what Jacob said. My father paused and looked at me. His eyes that were –just moments ago-concerned were now angered. He turned and glared at Jacob before he spoke.

"Jacob, this fight is the least of your worries right now" he said through his teeth. He turned around facing my uncles and Nahuel "Go…Nahuel"

My uncles let Nahuel go cautiously. He stood there for a moment glowering at Jacob; Jacob growled and started to bend his hind legs.

"Jacob" my mother stated firmly.

"Go" my father ordered Nahuel. Nahuel looked at me-his face pain stricken- then finally he was out of sight; moving faster than I thought he was capable of.

"Jake, this would work a lot better if you were human right now" my mother stated simply. He and the other three wolves ran away quickly-obviously to phase.

In there absence my father turned towards me. I didn't want to hold his eye contact I felt like I was going to get yelled at …like I was four years old or something.

Still looking at me; my father spoke to my mother "Did you know that our 17 year old daughter is planning on getting married?"

I froze. What had Jacob thought? Damn it, this was definitely not the time or the place to discuss this. My eyes quickly jumped to my mothers; her face had to have mirrored mine. I didn't want her in the middle of this; I didn't want them to fight. I focused on controlling my thoughts.

"Was" I emphasized "…planning on it…I was going to tell you but then we… broke up." It was still so hard to say it "We are not engaged anymore…I'm sorry" the words flew out with no control.

He looked at me skeptically. "You're not engaged? Well then why is Jacob calling you his fiancé in his thoughts?" he said angrily.

I ignored my fathers tone. My heart leapt into oblivion, Jacob referred to me as his fiancé? What did this mean? Did he want me back? Has he forgiven me?

It was hard to control my happiness, which came through in my thoughts.

My father grunted "You are too young. This is completely out of the question. Maybe you two need this break"

My mother faced my father, they were quiet. Her shield was obviously up. His face just seemed scarier and scarier I so badly wanted to know what she was saying. He finally looked back at me.

"We will discuss this at home" he said still speaking through his teeth.

"Ok" I answered quickly and nervously.

At that same moment Jacob was walking up…my heart began to race. I knew I could try and control my thoughts- at least- but my heart…there was no controlling that. My father grimaced as a low growl escaped his lips; I saw my mother nudge him in the side.

"She needs to be home before dark…not a second later" my father demanded.

Jacob nodded once. No expression on his face.

My mother looked at me, a soft and almost unrecognizable smile rested on her face before she grabbed my fathers hand and walked away, my uncles followed. As they turned I could see Uncle Emmett with a huge smirk on his face. He was lucky I had bigger things to worry about.

Jacob walked towards me. Not saying one word. He was only a few inches from me when he looked up finally making eye contact.

"Jake" my voice was light, it still wasn't my voice that I'd been searching for these last few weeks but it wasn't desperate and lonely or tired. It was just...

"What the hell were you thinking?" he barked at me.

I was startled I wasn't expecting such a harsh tone from him.

"Jacob, I was just…"

"I get it…you were trying to protect…him…but you could have gotten killed, you know you can't get that close to me when I'm phased"

Did he actually think I was protecting Nahuel? I was insulted Jacob truly didn't know how I felt about him. It was my fault I hadn't done a good job showing him how much I truly loved him…obviously.

"Jacob I wasn't …"

"Yea I know…you weren't thinking…"

I was tired of this, I was tired of never being strong enough to say what I wanted to say; always having the conversation manipulated by everyone else because I was too weak, too broken, too…afraid to speak up.

"Jacob shut up and listen to me" I shouted abruptly.

He stopped talking his eyes wide,

"I wasn't protecting him…but I wasn't going to let you two kill each other. Have you lost your mind? Fighting over me? For what Jacob…?" I quizzed angrily "You already have me…you are never going to lose me. I made a mistake but this…you leaving me has tortured me… it opened my eyes. I can't live without you Jacob; and when I say that I am being completely honest with you"

Once again tears wouldn't stay where they belonged they traveled down my cheeks.

"You have to see that I am new to this Jacob…when you first told me that you imprinted on me…I lied to you, I said that I wasn't scared that it wasn't too much, but I was scared… it was too much…being able to understand what it was I was feeling for you was way too much. And I know thats no excuse… but I understand it now, I accept it now. You will never know how much you mean to me" I wiped tears away "I know I messed us up…"

"Nessie" he interrupted "Nessie…its ok" he whispered as he walked closer to me. I felt his eyes on my face as I stood there crying looking at the ground.

He kissed my forehead softly; I didn't want to be tricked again. I couldn't let him be this close to me if it was just another lapse of self control on his part. I stepped back-my eyes still on the ground- he grabbed my hand and matched my step, still remaining the same distance from me.

He took his hand and gently wiped away my tears, placing a soft kiss on my eye lid. I was rigid and self conscience. I'd put my heart out there to be stomped on too many times. I knew I deserved whatever I had coming to me but it was only so much I could physically take.

I tried with little effort to dislodge my hand from his warm hold, but he just held it tighter and pulled me slowly closer to him.

"Jacob…" I began.

"I know…" was all he said; he lifted my face up slowly and -for the second time today- his lips rested tenderly on mine. I didn't move my lips as he laid soft kisses against mine. I couldn't allow myself to fully believe he wanted this; I blamed it on his longing for me i.e. the imprinting.

I wouldn't allow myself to kiss him, knowing that it didn't change anything, knowing that he was just momentarily weak. He was going to regret this, I couldn't deal with this again…I wasn't strong enough.

As these thoughts ran through my mind, I just stood there letting him kiss every inch of my neck, my face, my lips. I had no logic, my main purpose was that I didn't want to fall into this trap again but in all actuality I already had…as soon as my father said Jacob referred to me as his fiancé in his mind.

I needed to know that he forgave me, that he was willing to put all of this behind us. I needed to know that we could build from these mistakes and be happy again, because I couldn't be happy without Jacob. No other emotions besides pain and sorrow existed when I didn't have Jacob with me by my side.

"Nessie, I forgive you" he said simply it was like he read my mind. And for the first time I exhaled, hearing those words sent elation through me. We were finally going to move past this, I went to speak but he continued.

"And I hope you can forgive me…I needed time to think Nessie, and no matter how I try to break it down…I can't keep forcing myself to do what I just cant do" the passion in his eyes pierced straight through me "Being away from you…I can't do"

And that was all I needed to hear. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling his face closer to mine so I could finally kiss him. Finally releasing all of my longing and anxiety for him through my lips. There wasn't one thing more precious than this moment, I'd said this before but everything just happened to disappear I couldn't rationalize anything; all I knew was that I was here with Jacob and he wanted-finally- to be here with me.

Jacob picked me up in his arms my lips apparently incapable of leaving his lips. They craved his lips, they wanted to absorb every second every motion of this kiss. My arms were still wrapped around his neck as his arms gripped around my waist firmly. I was so lost in the exhilaration that at first I hadn't noticed Jacob had begun to walk –rather quickly- to his house. It seemed as if no time passed before we slammed through Jacob's front door.

I hadn't noticed the scenery only vaguely realizing we were in Jacob's room. Everything was a complete blur, a total eclipse of the mind. I saw nothing but Jacob's face as my back was being gently placed on his bed.

Quickly scenarios entered my mind. The main scenario; being that Jacob and I were actually going to do this. My heart sputtered, all my anticipation would finally cease today? I didn't know how to react but to just go with it.

We kissed passionately as Jacob unbuttoned my shirt. My mind couldn't help but doubt everything that was happening. We'd come so close so many times but always something was in the way…something made us always contradict what we were wanting so badly to do.

I could hear my cell phone buzz, but I ignored it. My mind was focused on more important things right now. Then Jacob's phone rang, it was almost as if he didn't hear it at all.

Jacob was on top of me as he kissed the nape of my neck, then slowly he kissed my chest, my breast exposed as he flung my bra to the floor. He kissed my lips softly. Our eyes met; a moment went by before Jacob spoke.

"Nessie… do you want to do this?" his voice was unsure. This was truly my choice.

I looked at him, knowing that there was nothing else I wanted more in than world than to be with Jacob. But this would be a big step, this would change things forever.

"Yes" I said low but confident. Jacob just stared at me like he was contemplating my response.

"You don't have to feel pressured to do anything, I'm sorry I …"

"No Jacob" I interrupted as I placed my hands on both sides of his face, pulling his face towards mine to kiss him.

This kiss grew into something more…I felt energy radiate through me. I knew that finally Jacob and I were going to do this, that we would finally be able to express our love for one another physically.

There seemed to be a pull that was detrimental to my health, it felt as if I would literally die or cease to exist if I couldn't be with Jacob right now.

My hands caressed Jacob's muscular back before they dipped to his shorts. I slowly untied the draw string. He then delicately pulled my jeans off; I heard them thump to floor. My heart jolted; nervousness and anticipation encompassed my entire body.

Jacob pulled his lips from mine hesitantly, just staring down at me. I was prepared to ask him what was wrong but then he spoke.

"Nessie" he whispered. His voice made me shiver. "Are you sure…are you ready?" his eyes were intent on mine. He wanted to make sure I had no doubts; what he failed to realize was that there was nothing about 'us' that I doubted…so anything that happened in between could just fall into place.

I was too nervous to speak; I just nodded ever so slightly.

"I love you" he said as he pressed his lips against mine.

"I love you too" I murmured against his lips. His hand was warm against the back of my thigh as he lifted it up slowly.

**Chapter 15 Part II:**** Bella POV**

"You knew" Edward urged through his teeth as we walked through the front door of our home "How could you keep something like that from me?"

"I didn't keep it from you…exactly" I said. I wasn't lying.

"She's a little girl, Bella" he repeated for the third time

"Edward, she is 17. And you don't think I agree with you?" I grabbed his hand as I spoke in an attempt to calm him down. "It's just that she needs time Edward, this situation with Jacob…its hard for her"

He just stared at me waiting for me to continue.

"Remember this is knew for her…she is in love"

"I don't care that she is in love, she is too young" he barked.

"What if Charlie had been so unreasonable?" I hated to pull that card but Edward was being very stubborn. He couldn't face the fact that Renesmee wasn't our 8 year old little girl but she was a maturing young woman. I hated it as much as he did the thought of my little girl falling in love and wanting to be married and…start a family, her own family.

Edward paused as what I said sunk in; his eye brows perched together as his face slipped into a scowl.

"That's entirely different" he finally spoke lowly

"It really isn't if you think about it" I disagreed "Jacob and Renesmee love each other and we have known since the beginning that this was bound to happen"

He was going to say something but I interrupted "Can we just talk about this after everything has passed?"

He didn't answer "There are bigger things we have to worry about…right now at least." I continued.

He looked at me once more before he walked out of the room. I knew he was upset but he needed to realize that this was reality. Whether he liked it or not Renesmee and Jacob were going to be together. He also needed to realize that as much as he wanted to or …we wanted to, we couldn't stop them from being together.

I was about to go in the next room to see if Edward was willing to hold a conversation with me; without having a tantrum, when my phone rang.

"Alice…hey…"

"Bella, Jacob was right. They are coming…they coming now" Alice's voice was panicked.

"What…? Joham and Serina…but…when, are you sure?"

"Today… they are only hours away…I am 100% sure. Bella we need to be ready now. Carlisle has already contacted the Volturi they will be here as soon as they can but there is no guarantee they will make it on time"

I tried to take in all of what Alice was saying. It seemed as if every corner we turned was a battle to keep our daughter safe. A battle I would gladly fight.

Before I could turn to get Edward he was already standing beside me, his hand out, in reach for the phone.

I paid no attention to what Edward was saying to Alice all I could focus on was the fact that everything that I'd been trying to push to the back of my mind was starting to surface. This whole time I knew I had at least one week to prepare for anything, prepare for the biggest fight our family would ever face.

Renesmee is everything to our entire family, Joham and Serina would not come and take away our happiness. Over my dead body was an unusual term to use in this situation but it rang true to my still heart. There was nothing we wouldn't do to keep her safe. There was nothing I wouldn't risk to make sure she could sleep well at night.

Edward slammed my phone shut.

"What did she say?" I asked as I followed him towards the back of our house.

"We need to get all the wolves together every single one of them…" his voice sounded distracted.

"Ok, what are you doing now though?"

"Seth and Quil are patrolling I'm sending them back to La Push to get the others."

"Edward …" my voice was shaky

"Bella I know" his voice was comforting "It's going to be ok. We will have Renesmee back here at the house or the main house; hidden safe and secure while we deal with this"

He walked outside as Seth and Quil -in there wolf form- towered over him. I didn't hear what he told them but they immediately ran back into the woods quickly becoming invisible.

I grabbed my cell that Edward had placed on the counter and dialed Renesmee's number.

No answer.

I was tired of playing phone tag with my daughter. It aggravated me even worse now that I was in town only minutes away and she wasn't answering.

I dialed Jacob's number and he didn't answer as well.

A sense of panic overwhelmed me; I couldn't just simply rely on Alice's visions. I couldn't just hope the wolves would be able to protect my daughter until we figured something out. I just needed to be with my daughter, she needed to be in my arms.

As soon as the thought ran through my mind, I was already out of the door.

"I have to get Renesmee now" I yelled past Edward as I breezed through the trees to La Push. I didn't give him a chance to respond. I knew him so well, he probably wanted to follow me but I knew he needed to get to the main house and map out exactly what we were going to do in the few short hours we had left to prepare for Joham and Serina's arrival.

I was finally on the reservation. The wolves, Joham, Serina or even the Volturi…it didn't matter I would protect my daughter, that was my job from day one and I wasn't going to let that falter anything now.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16 Impulse

I braced myself as I felt the heat from his body press against mine. I didn't know what to expect. I didn't know how I would feel or how I would react I just knew that I needed to be connected to Jacob. I needed this bond between us to be cemented in my being from here on in.

Jacob buried his face in my neck as he slowly inched closer to me. The anticipation was eating away at me, my traitor nerves caused me to stiffen in just the thought of what was to come.

"Are you ok? I don't have to…"

"Shhh" I said softly "I'm ok, you can go" my voice was unconvincing. Jacob didn't move or say anything.

"Please… I'm fine. I love you Jacob, I'm sure about this"

His face was serious as he placed a soft kiss on my lips. My back was arched, his hand gently hiking my leg up.

This was it I thought to myself, after this moment everything changes.

Jacob stopped moving abruptly; his face in a scowl

"Kika" he yelled towards the window- speaking in Quileute.

I was confused; I didn't hear anything but then again I wasn't actually paying much attention to the outside world at the moment.

"Was ho" I heard a voice yell back that sounded a lot like Quil. I hated when they spoke in Quileute, it was another code that I would never understand.

Jacob growled "Nessie, I'm so sorry…just…" he looked at the window then back at my naked body. He sighed regretfully almost as if he were torn between the two "…just stay here don't move. I'll get rid of them"

I nodded. This very important moment was quickly turning into every other encounter I've ever had with Jacob. Something was always getting in the way, something always causing us not to be able to just act on impulse.

Jacob threw on his shorts and went outside. I grabbed his blanket and pulled it over me. I felt almost dirty-not in the clean sense- laying there in his bed, naked waiting for him to come back so we could-finally- have sex. This whole situation was out of my element.

I decided I wanted to know what was so important that Quil had to ruin me and Jacob's –almost-very special moment. I sat up; wrapping the blanket completely around me before I walked to his bedroom window.

They were not far and with my heightened senses I could hear clearly even though it didn't matter. They were still speaking in Quileute. I had a hunch they were doing this on purpose, trying to keep something from me.

I knew a couple Quileute words so I decided to focus as hard as I could maybe I would be able to decipher a few and figure out what they were talking about.

A lot of the words flew by me in a gust; I had no clue where the word began or where it finished. At this moment I regretted being impatient with Jacob years ago when he tried to teach me.

I heard Seth say "Pokskilli" I knew that had something to do with being at Forks or going to Forks.

Jacob said something so quickly that I couldn't catch it, but I did hear Quil say Alice's name and then he said "hw pa" I knew that meant in a while or soon.

Those little pieces of a much larger chunk of words caused my heart to race. Going to Forks, Alice, something was coming soon. What did it all mean? The first thing my mind went to was Joham; had something happened? Had Jacob been right?

Before I could ask myself the next question I saw my mother walking from the trail. I panicked. I looked at Jacob he turned towards the house quickly his face almost mirrored how I assumed my face looked.

He saw me standing there only being covered by his blanket; I turned quickly.

Grabbing clothes wildly, trying to put them on as fast as I could. I latched my bra back on and button my jeans. I yelled at Jacob in my mind, I always told him to clean his room. If it wasn't such a mess I would no where my shirt was right now.

I peered out of the window again to see my mother standing there next to Jacob, Seth and Quil. Her face was focused; I'd missed what she said but she was obviously here for a reason. This just reaffirmed what I'd been thinking. Joham and Serina were here or they were definitely on there way.

I heard Jacob trip over his words when my mother asked where I was.

"Oh, Nessie…? She's …ah… sleeping" he finally concluded "Everything that happened today was a lot for her"

I heard my mother say "Ok, well I'll just wake her up she can sleep at the house."

I scrambled for my shirt, I was on all fours in the abyss of dirty clothes and empty pizza boxes in his room when finally there my shirt was, inside out and wrinkled. I buttoned it up quickly jumped back on the bed throwing the covers on top of me.

"Renesmee, wake up sweetie we have to go home" she said softly.

I acted as if I were yawning. "Mom…? What are you doing here?" acting like I didn't know where I was.

"Renesmee, why is your heart beating so fast? Did I scare you?"

Damn it. I thought to myself. I could lie all I wanted but having vampires as parents made impossible to cover up the thumping of my heart.

"Yea…and… I was having a nightmare, I think" I quickly changed the subject "Why are you here; is everything ok?"

She looked at me; I detected fear in her eyes. It always struck me so hard when I could read my parents face so easily. They always tried so hard to keep me out of danger, to make sure I wasn't fearful, so I knew it had to be something big or something they were not sure about when there heart was on there sleeve.

"Alice saw Joham and Serina"

My fear was confirmed.

"They are coming today…they acted on impulse. And we are sure they are bringing some of the half immortals"

I just stared at her as she spoke. No expression ran across my face. I was use to this by now, I was use to the fact that every time something right was going on in my life, something had to come and take it away. My mother looked nervous as she walked towards me.

"Renesmee are you ok? Sweetie…" she said as she touched my face.

I hadn't realized what I must have looked like to her. I didn't blink, I didn't speak, I didn't move. I knew that Joham was coming back, this knowledge was known but I think I somehow managed to think that it would just go away. Joham would grow bored of the wait and the chase. I was sorely wrong.

"I'm fine" I blinked "So…what are we doing. What do we do?" I still showed no emotion I couldn't. I think I was truly and entirely exhausted…with everything.

"The Volturi are on there way here, but there is no guarantee they will be here on time." She sat on the bed next to me "Your father wants to round up all of the wolves; they are our biggest chance at least scaring or hopefully killing Serina"

I nodded.

"I know this is a lot to take in…are you ok?" her voice was concerned.

"Yea…let's just go" I jumped up. She followed quickly behind me as I walked out his bedroom. We were outside in no time. Jacob was standing right there, his eyes were trying to read my face.

"I'm going to take her back to the house, I'll tell Edward you will be there with the pack in 10 minutes" my mom told Jacob.

He nodded. It was almost as if I was embarrassed to look at him. I think shame was coloring my face. I was sure my mother felt the tension.

"Well ok" she said confused. "Let's go Renesmee"

"Ok" I said to my mother; then I turned to Jacob "Bye" I said lowly as I began to walk away. He grabbed my wrist. His touch made my heart jump.

He pulled me into him hugging me. I was surprised he would do this in front of my mom. "Don't be scared…I will protect you" he whispered in my hair. I didn't say anything as we stood there in front of my mother, Seth and Quil.

"I love you Jacob" I finally spoke.

"I know" he released his arms from around me, placing his hands on either side of my face "I love you too" he said before he placed a soft kiss on my forehead.

In the corner of my eye I could see my mother's face it was too hard to read. I finally was able to detach myself from Jacob's hold, which was more difficult than I expected it to be. It almost felt like we were saying goodbye. It felt like I wouldn't see him for a while even though he would be at my house in just minutes.

I absorbed one more look in his eyes before I turned around. As my mother and I walked away I could feel Jacob's eyes burning through me.

I was completely prepared to run back to our house but my mother grabbed my hand, we stood there for a moment before she spoke.

"Your father isn't happy" she said simply "I am not trying to stand in your way…but I think you two are moving too fast."

I didn't say anything I just listened.

"You are a young woman and me …of all people… I understand exactly what you are feeling right now…it's hard to deal with it all, but I think you need to slow down…that's all I'm asking"

I went to interject but she continued.

"I don't know what that was back there, but you both …"

"It was nothing" I interrupted "Mom, there is a lot going on and it's all happening at once…can we just talk about all of this after…everything"

She was reading my face; I knew my eyes were pleading. Finally she nodded before she spoke again.

I started to walk again but she grabbed my arm. "Just make sure, you don't think too much"

I immediately knew what she meant.

"Your father is really on edge"

I felt like I was going to sweat bullets. I had to control so much around him, I was starting to think it would be better to just tell them everything out in the open but I'm sure that wouldn't go over well.

**Chapter 16 Part II**

It was too quiet; I needed some sign of life. How I wished Jacob could be sitting here next to me. I knew the whole point was to keep me safe but the loneliness made me feel more exposed than ever.

I should be out there; this was my fault anyway. Having my entire family, all my friends even the Volturi out there preparing to fight and for what? Me? It felt like the older I got and the more I understood, the more I messed up. I was constantly finding new ways to ruin the lives of those around me.

I didn't like this hiding out. It felt cowardly. I didn't want to look in the eyes of the vampire who nearly raped me or in the eyes of his partner who tried to kidnap me. But staying in the cellar at the main house was not something that was sitting well with me. I'd promised I wouldn't move, I knew aunt Alice would be looking for me to make any decisions to disobey orders. So I knew if I was going to do this I would have to act on impulse.

How long did they actually expect me to stay hidden away down here?

I really didn't have a plan but I did have a motive. My motive was to not lie dormant as my mother, my father, uncles and aunts, grandfather and grandmother, my close friends on the reservation and my …fiancé risk everything and I haven't even shown my face.

I'm sure logic escaped me but this made complete sense to me. I couldn't stay in here. I could help fight the half immortals. They were the same breed as I was the only difference is that they prefer human blood. My family didn't take into consideration that I was extremely strong –for what I was- and I was pretty fast.

This was my war; I deserved to fight in it.

I pulled out my cell phone-which didn't have any bars- the time was a quarter to 9. Joham, Serina and there army should be here right now. I couldn't hear anything in this cellar. I had no clue of where exactly everything was happening but I knew it wasn't too far. I wondered if the Volturi made it on time.

I knew the wolves were going to dominate-at least I hope- Jacob allowed four of the new wolves to join. Knowing that Serina is as afraid of wolves as she is, Jacob knew he had to have a heavy presence of wolves. She would definitely be intimidated.

I got up from the small couch as I placed my cell phone back in my pocket. I walked to the edge of the steps looking up. My feet wouldn't move. I knew by walking up those steps and opening that door that I could risk my own safety. But I'd already made up my mind.

I took that first step slowly, clamping my hands around the charm on my bracelet. I climbed each step cautiously until I reached the door. I exhaled then slowly turned the knob.

I expected to hear loud crashing and bones cracking. I expected to see a war zone, giant wolves attacking ravished half immortals.

But I saw nothing I heard nothing. I climbed the last step to the top finally fully out of the cellar.

I walked out vigilantly my eyes peering across the open area. I finally heard vague muffles of an apparent fight. I couldn't believe how far the fight traveled from the main house. I followed the sounds slowly hoping to see what I'd caused.

The sounds became louder and more evident. I could hear slamming and growling, crashing and crunching. Then a light bulb went off.

I remembered Serina's power; she was capable of reflecting powers off of her like a repellant.

If she were in the fight, there really wouldn't be much of a fight, right? That was my families biggest fear, knowing Serina was capable of anything her power being unmatched. Serina was capable of causing bodily harm just by simply reflecting Jane's power to everyone, or shielding the half immortals with my mother's power. Maybe she could even read minds using my father or Aro's power. So many possibilities, she wouldn't just physically fight and not use any of her power to have the upper hand. Why was there commotion? I envisioned a stand off or some negotiation between the Volturi and Joham.

Something wasn't clicking for me, a puzzle piece was missing.

Serina was missing.

I realized there was no way Serina was in this fight, but Alice saw her, Alice was sure that Serina would be here.

Suddenly, I felt cold arms wrap around me so tight that a full humans bones would have been crushed immediately.

"Wow, you made that way easier than I thought it would be!" Serina's voice rang as I struggled against her. "I was getting bored looking for you" she continued. I kicked and scraped at her.

"Hey, don't be rude Renesmee…and don't act like you didn't miss me" she said cordially.

"Let me go they will find you, they will kill you" I tried to scream but she put her hand over my mouth.

"Shhh… your no fun when you act like this" she hiked me up higher gripping me even tighter, I couldn't breath, I was lucky breathing was an necessity and not crucial to my survival.

"Now you are going to be a good little girl"

I clawed at her hands to no avail, but I somehow managed to lift my hand behind me and try to jab at her eyes, anything to keep her from moving her feet at this point.

"That's not nice" she said angrily I couldn't tell if she were mocking me or truly upset.

She yanked my wrist down, almost crushing it completely. I heard a snap as I watched my bracelet hit the ground.

My heart sank. I felt like my bracelet falling to the ground symbolized a lot. It symbolized that it was officially done; I was going to be in Joham's control. I wasn't going to have my Jacob.

I looked at the bracelet and finally the reality set in, I was no match for any of this. I needed my family and friends more than I ever thought I would. But it didn't matter now. It was over. Evil prevailed.

"Ok…say goodbye to this pretty mansion I don't think you will be seeing it again anytime soon"

One single tear streamed down my face as I still kept focus on the bracelet lying there in the dirt.

The bracelet was further and further away quickly disappearing; as I realized Serina had won. Worse yet Joham had won.

She was running with me full speed; I lay limp like a rag doll in her arms. I was consumed, I couldn't move. The faster she moved the further away my life seemed. I didn't have one anymore; it now belonged to Joham.

My mind was a broken record; I just kept repeating to myself 'I'm sorry Jacob, I love you'.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17 Jealousy

I was cold, the smell was almost unbearable. It was dark…too dark even for my eyes. I had no idea where I was.

I woke up to this hell, this unfamiliar personal hell.

The only thing I could remember was Jacob. I remembered his sweet breath tickling my skin; I remembered his warm touch sending electric current through my body. I remembered the last words he muttered to me 'I love you too'. Like a gust of wind it all came back to me.

Serina got what she wanted, she tore me form my home; she tore me from my family, she tore me from my Jacob.

I felt sick, there was no air circulating in the room. Even though I didn't truly need the air, I felt like I would die without it, sort of like how I needed Jacob right now but not as strong.

I had to have passed out something because nothing was clear. I realized I had no clue how long I'd been here. Had it been weeks or months or just mere seconds?

My memory was a foggy haze of confusion and anger.

I had to get out of here and now, I couldn't be down here a second longer without going mad.

I went to move, but was yanked back violently by a chain. I felt my right wrist with my left hand and there I felt the –what felt like-cold steel of the cuff that clamped around my wrist.

I felt this sense of emptiness when I realized, this cuff was taking the place of my bracelet. The emptiness, turned into sadness, the sadness turned into tears, the tears turned into desperation, the desperation turned into anger.

I was not going to stay here.

I am a half vampire I could break this chain if I concentrated enough.

I could barley see a thing as I banged the cuff against what I believe was a piece of stone. The stone crumbled into little pieces, but the cuff remained.

I took my free hand and pulled at the chain, but nothing happened. I couldn't believe it, I was strong; my vampire strength did nothing compared to whatever it was that was keeping me chained up here.

I went to my last resort. My teeth. I'd never really used them-as vampires use them- I use to hunt a lot when I was younger but as I grew I tried to stick with eating only human food.

My teeth were every bit as strong as a full vampires were; I believed. I clamped my teeth on the first link under my cuff, small chards of whatever this material was, started to fall as I chiseled away.

Minutes past as I continued to gnaw away at the chain, then I heard a crisp snap and my right wrist felt lighter. Hope moved sporadically through me as I realized I was free.

I used the word 'free' loosely; I still had to find away out and then find out where exactly I was.

I got up slowly; I had to hunch because where ever I was –some type of cave, I concluded- was small in every direction.

As I felt around along the side of the 'caves' walls I felt a hallow space. I used my shoulder to crack at the wall, its materials-dirt and weak concrete I presumed- crumbled at my feet. Finally a source of light was peering through what was now definitely some sort of cave.

The hole was too small, so I got down on all fours and crawled through it. As my hands reached the other side; mud was everywhere as I trampled through it. For a second I felt like I was crawling in circles, that there was no way out. Until finally, I saw a large gaping hole, that was only being blocked with pieces of material that looked like wood.

If it was wood they really underestimated my strength. I climbed up the two huge muddy boulders until I got to the wooden planks.

With one quick punch I broke the first plank, splinters of woods flying in every direction. I did this until the eight planks were nothing but discarded dismembered twigs on the cave floor.

I was so close to freedom. I couldn't help but think this was too easy. All the noise I'd made wouldn't Joham or Serina hear me? Wouldn't they have had half immortals guarding me 24/7?

I sat back on the ground. Looking at my only means to freedom, it had to be a trick. Serina was sadistic and found joy in watching me struggle watching me suffer.

I kept peering out waiting for someone to throw me back in, but no one ever came.

I was becoming delirious I could swear I heard Jacob calling my name, I heard Nahuel calling my name, my mother, my father but every time I heard it I was too weak to respond. I was dizzy and my mind was playing tricks on me.

I was so close to 'freedom' yet so far away.

I knew it would only be a short time before Joham came down here. I knew it would be a short time before he…

**Bella POV **

I turned the knob slowly and to my surprise it was unlocked.

"Renesmee…?" I called out. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion, why wasn't she answering me? I wasn't allowing my biggest fear to become a reality.

"Nessie" Jacob yelled out behind me loudly, still no response. Panic coursed through me quickly as we ravished through all seven rooms in the cellar looking for Renesmee.

Everything was ok, I knew that Renesmee was probably exhausted a lot has been going on in her life, she was probably sleeping, she probably didn't hear us. I kept lying to myself as we entered the last room and she was nowhere to be found.

I turned around to Jacob, whose face was pained and scared, ultimately mirroring mine. We didn't have time to say a word before he was out of the cellar; a crashing sound shaking the walls around me as he phased in search of Renesmee.

I don't think shock, anguish and failure were the words to describe what I was feeling at that moment. I felt empty; like a part me was dormant.

I clutched my stomach remembering what it felt like to feel my Renesmee for the first time. That was the only true time I was able to protect her, all on my own…just me and my love for her. No vampire or pack of wolves could compare; my love was so strong I knew that was all I needed to keep her safe. It was the only clear memory I had of my human years.

I decided that would be my job my most important job.

I'd failed miserably. How could this happen, what had we done wrong? Why wasn't my daughter here safe…with me?

Everything was supposed to be over, we'd won against Joham. The smell of burning half immortals permeated the air. I watched as Edward destroyed Joham. I knew at that moment Renesmee would be safe again.

Never more than this moment did I wish I could cry, cry out for my daughter, we failed at protecting our most prized possession our most loved being; she was the beating heart of our family taking the place of our still one.

I ran quickly to the main house…she wasn't there, I ran to our home straight to her room and every other room in the house…no Renesmee. I ran back to the edge of the clearing. I saw Edward throwing dismembered body parts of the half immortals into a booming fire. I braced myself for what I was about to say to him. He noticed me before I could move my feet towards him.

"Bella" he said with a slight smile on his face. His smile quickly turned into concern when he read my face.

I was by Edward's side in no time. The look of shock and confusion ran across his face.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he quizzed

I couldn't bring myself to actually say the words. I put my shield up and let him read my mind.

"That's not possible" he said as if he wanted to argue with me. Alice stood on the other side of Edward her face confused as well.

"Alice would know" he said again, trying to befuddle my words.

"Know what…?" Alice begged.

Edward was gone.

"What's going on?" Alice said impatiently.

I breathed in, before I could allow my self to say the words.

"Renesmee" my voice cracked "She's…she's gone" I could feel my face rippling in pain.

"How…did she run away?" Alice asked shocked.

"No" I said abruptly "She would never run away"

"I don't understand Bella, I didn't see anything…and Joham he's…"

I didn't hear the rest of what she was saying; I began thinking of what could have happened.

Serina entered my mind briefly but Alice saw Serina arguing with Joham before they came to Forks she'd left him, she wasn't apart of this anymore. She would have no reason for taking Renesmee.

"…did you pick up a scent?"

No I hadn't picked up a scent, my mind suddenly back peddling drastically. I remembered what the wolf pack said. Serina was able to cover her scent-somehow- it was hard to detect her. Then I remembered what Renesmee showed me; the things Serina said to her.

How she didn't see what Joham saw in her, how Joham had peculiar taste.

It all added up, she was jealous of Joham's infatuation with Renesmee.

"It's Serina" I said weakly.

"Bella, it can't be… I saw her leave, she…"

"She did all of that for you, she knew you would see her leave." I was figuring everything out as I spoke "She took Renesmee in spite of Joham, she is jealous"

"Why didn't I see? I …"

"Alice it's hard for you to sense her, you didn't see her last time until she was already too close…somehow she is learning how to control it…she is much stronger than we thought" As I said that last would I knew this would be the biggest fight of our lives.

I needed to get to Edward.

As much as I wanted to cower somewhere and try desperately to weep for my missing daughter, I knew this-more than any other time in my existence I needed to be strong. Not for myself, not for Edward or Jacob or this family. I needed to be strong for Renesmee.

Nothing or no one was going to get away with this. She was a young woman now, a beautiful charismatic angel. We'd watched her grow into this magnificent young being.

She needed to be back with me, back with her family safe and out of harms way. I clutched my stomach again. Remembering when she was just my little nudger when I could keep her close and always protect her…just me and her.

**Chapter 17 Part II**

"Well lookey here"

The words were gargled as I tried to process them.

"Someone was one step short of escaping I see"

I was exhausted and hungry; I believe I was fading in and out of consciousness. I quickly understood where I was, Serina's bell like voice bringing me back to reality.

"You are stronger than you look I must say…I can't believe you got out of that chain. Impressive." Her voice was enthusiastic not at all appropriate for the context of this conversation.

"They're…" my voice wasn't mine again it was low… raspy… weak "Going to find you. I promise and they will kill you and Joham"

She laughed an evil laugh "Oh, its funny how you assume your family is still alive…well I guess they never were 'alive' in the first place but you get the point"

Her words slammed down on my heart like a ton of bricks. She had to be bluffing, there was no way my family lost. The Volturi was there…I think. And the wolves fought and my family…my family are strong vampires; they didn't lose.

"But you are probably worried more about your little wolves I bet" I could hear a smile in her voice "…yea, sorry sunshine…there luck was much worse than your families."

"I don't believe you. You're lying" I yelled out, quickly her cold hand was covering my mouth.

"Shhh…if you don't believe me then why are you so upset?"

I wouldn't believe her, I didn't believe her. My family and Jacob and the rest of the pack were looking for me right now, I knew it.

"Now, no more screaming right? People pick the most interesting ways to grieve…and I don't mind that you're sad but please cool it with the screaming I hate a lot of noise"

"You and Joham wont get away with this" I said through my teeth.

"Oh, but we already have"

It was hard to see her face; and the angle in which she was sitting beside me was awkward on the account of it was a small cave, barley enough room for one person let alone two bodies.

"Well…I got away with it. I really could care less about your family or the pack of dogs you hang out with…but Joham needs to realize he is nothing without me"

Confusion washed over me, I wasn't following what she was saying.

"You're his precious little Renesmee…and for what? What have you done? You don't even want him…you're essentially running away from him" she babbled on "but me… I do everything for him, I'm always there, waiting on him hand and foot…and still all I hear is your damn name every five minutes"

My panic spiked as she spoke.

"So…I'll show him there was life before he met you and there will be life after you die"

That was it; she was doing this by herself. She was using me as a prop to get back at Joham? She was going to kill me over jealousy.

"You don't have to do this" I begged "Just please let me go…please"

"Now why would I do that after everything I went through?" she quizzed "You know how much energy and concentration it took, to cover my scent…" she began counting off on her fingers " and trying to cover your scent was even harder, I don't think I did a really good job at it" she laughed "umm…tricking your aunt Alice…and figuring out how to use your moms shield so your dad couldn't hear me….let me tell you not fun at all. I'm not really big on hard work"

She was saying this as if she were joking; she wasn't speaking like she was thoroughly ruining innocent people's lives over jealousy.

For the first time I felt hopeless. I wouldn't allow myself to believe that my family was…

And that Jacob was…

But I had no clue how long I was here, wouldn't they have come for me by now?

I heard Serina sigh

"What is taking Joham so long…he is definitely not going to be happy when I kill you but he needs to learn to stick with the people who are there for him not scared of him."

I ignored the rest of her rambling. I just went to a place in my mind that was completely disconnected from pain and fear, misery and regret. I went to a place where Jacob and I just looked at each other laying on the ground. No words…they weren't needed, they sometimes complicated things.

In my vision I could only see our faces, as the image slowly panned out I could see that he was holding my hand protectively. His eyes never left mine and mine never left his. As the image grew larger I saw fire and war, I saw Joham and I saw Serina.

The image was daunting and sinister; it was as if the entire world was burning around us. Slowly crumbling into nothing, but it didn't matter because Jacob was there and I was safe with him.

I knew that if Jacob remained then there was nothing I wouldn't fight for…I could survive this. But if what Serina was saying was actually true…then her killing me in front of Joham would be the only option. Living with the knowledge that Jacob-and my family- were…dead would be much worse than dying at the hands of Serina.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18 Reverse Psychology

**Bella POV **(Saturday 4:31 pm)

For the first time it was hard to get Edwards attention. I screamed his name, I begged him to wait and listen but he kept running with Emmett and Jasper directly behind him. Edward needed to know what he was looking for, he needed to stop and listen to me.

I tried to keep up with him as best I could but he was so much faster than I was. My only option to get his attention would be to throw my shield up which would be difficult; I'd never tried it while moving so quickly.

I concentrated on Edward-or the blur of him. Thoughts ran through my mind of Serina, her jealousy, how we had to find where Serina was, if we found where she was hiding out she would more than likely have Renesmee with her.

As quickly as my thoughts flitted across my mind in that same quickness Edward stopped. He turned face me.

"Bella are you sure?"

"Just think about it Edward, do you remember what Renesmee showed us? When Serina came to La Push?"

Edward nodded.

"Its jealousy, Serina hates that Joham is…" I corrected myself "…was so infatuated with Renesmee…they were obviously in a relationship"

Edward concentrated on my face before he spoke.

"Emmett…Jasper, go to the main house tell Carlisle to get a hold of Nahuel; his sister may know of any hideouts Joham and Serina may have and get the other's see if they can pick up Renesmee's scent anywhere" Edward ordered; his eyes still locked on mine.

"Bella, for once I want you to please listen to me…"

Before he said another word, I already knew what he was going to ask and I couldn't agree to it…I wouldn't agree to it.

"No, Edward" I spat out vehemently

"Please Bella, we don't know how dangerous Serina …"

"No, I sat out with Joham, I sat out with the immortals…I'm not sitting out for this. I'm going to find my daughter…our…daughter Edward and there is nothing you can say to rationalize what you're about to ask me"

I felt bad for speaking to him like this but this was a battle I would not ignore. My daughter needed me and I wasn't going to let her down…again. I am a vampire Edward still had it in his mind to protect me at all costs, when I can very well protect myself.

He sighed, but he didn't seem annoyed, it seemed like he was regretful.

"You are right" he said lowly "I apologize" he took my hand and closed his eyes, for the first time I saw the pain-of what was going on- ripple across his flawless face.

"We are going to find her" I said this almost as if I was reassuring myself but Edward answered anyways.

"Yes we are"

He opened his eyes, kissed my forehead then he was gone.

I ran back to the cellar, the door still wide open. I walked down the steps, hoping to find any clues. The only thing I noticed was that Renesmee's scent was very strong down here almost as if she were sitting right next to me.

I knew if I could follow her scent I would ultimately find her- that was common sense. But it didn't make sense. I vividly remember not smelling her past the cellar doors. I then second guessed myself, maybe I was so caught up in the shock that she was gone that I didn't concentrate as hard as I could have identifying her scent.

I walked slowly up the steps, Renesmee scent was strong. I continued through the door and her scent hadn't lessened at all. I stopped outside standing there breathing in my daughter's fragrance. I turned the opposite direction of where the main house and the clearing were, because obviously Serina wouldn't have taken Renesmee towards the battle.

As I turned Renesmee's scent was gone. I was confused. I turned towards the house and the clearing, trying to figure out Serina's logic, as I turned walking in that direction Renesmee's scent faded again.

I stood there it didn't make sense at all.

Then I realized what if Serina hadn't taken Renesmee anywhere? What if she was still here on our property? Maybe Serina found some joy in this sadistic game.

I ran down the stairs of the cellar, I ripped through the closets breaking down the doors and the walls; dirt and gravel, steal and other material shattering around me as I searched for her, the walls around me were literally caving in.

All of this was to no avail.

I stormed out the cellar, my conclusion had been wrong. I wanted to scream, I needed to scream, I needed my daughter. I didn't think it was possible but I felt weak. It felt like all my emotions and physical being from my human life managed to find there way back to me.

At that moment I could have sworn I could feel my still heart beat rapidly in panic, my unmoving lungs gasp for air, almost hyperventilating.

I fell violently to the ground, agony conquering my body.

Where was my daughter?

I sobbed tearlessly into the dirt, the emotional pain I was experiencing was worse than any physical pain I'd ever experienced, worse than the three days of torture I suffered when I was changed. Much worse.

Not knowing where my daughter was, not knowing if she was safe, not knowing if she was …alive. It tore a huge hole in the core of my body; never more than then this moment did my all so lifeless body seem alive and completely aware. I felt every ache of torment travel violently through me unapologetically.

As I sat there, trying so desperately to cry, something caught my eye. I looked up to see something silver almost half buried in the dirt. I reached for it.

When I realized what it was, it felt like everything around me was falling even deeper into nothingness.

It was Renesmee's bracelet, the bracelet that Jacob had given her for her birthday all those years ago. She never took this bracelet off not even once, and there it was broken, the charm still remained. I gripped the bracelet to my chest and closed my eyes.

"Renesmee" I spoke a loud; my voice hallowed with grief "We are going to find you and everything is going to be how it was before…I promise"

**Renesmee POV**

'_If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn into a mighty stranger: I should not seem apart of it.'_

That quote ran through my mind; what felt like for hours.

It was a quote from the book Wuthering Heights a book that my mother had to have read at least a hundred times in my life time. When I was young I would see this old weathered book lying around the house always in a different room.

I was curious about it; I always wanted to know why she loved it so much, why it didn't get boring reading it over and over again.

I remember asking her about it.

"Momma" I asked I had to have been two –technical- years old but I appeared to be around ten or so.

"Yes Renesmee" she answered as she book marked her page in Wuthering Heights and sat it down on the arm rest of the couch.

"How many times have you read that book?" I quizzed. She laughed before she answered.

"Did your dad send you in here to ask me that?"

I shook my head indicating 'no' and smiled, waiting for an answer.

She moved closer to one side of the couch while she patted the seat. "Sit next to me" she smiled.

And I did.

"Well, sweetie, I just really like it…sometimes when you find something or someone that is very interesting to you and you cant get enough of it…you just want it around all the time" she smiled then continued "Sort of like how I feel about you and your dad" she joked.

I laughed slightly "But what is it about?" I questioned. She didn't answer at first.

"Well…" she paused "it's a love story…even though your father thinks otherwise" her face looked almost irritated but not like she was mad but like she wished she could explain it right.

"What does daddy think?"

She made a face-almost a frown "He thinks it's a hate story"

"Why…?"

"Because your father and I think differently" a soft smile showed clear on her face.

"Can I read it?" my voice was a little excited, I'd always loved reading new books learning new things.

But her face didn't seem too thrilled.

"I don't know Renesmee; I think you might be too young to read a book like this"

My face turned into a frown and my eyes were saddened, I hated being told I was too young to do something.

I placed my hand on top of hers and showed her how badly I wanted to read it, I showed her that in a couple of months I would pretty much be a pre teen. I showed her how I was already beyond my years and very mature I even –jokingly- showed her that I was more mature than Uncle Emmett. She laughed and said "That's for sure"

I lifted my hand slowly, as I looked at her in the eyes. I tried to use the most helpless face I could conger up. I was used to getting my way with my entire family and Jacob and if it was something they really were not too excited to do, I would hit them with the face I was using right now.

She sighed heavily before speaking "What am I going to do with you?"

"I don't know momma, but since you have read this book a million times I'm going to start on it right now" I exclaimed.

She laughed "I hope that's you asking me and not telling me"

"Sorry" I smiled as I took the book off the arm rest. I was so used to getting what I wanted that I sometimes forgot to ask things, it was sort of an inside joke between my mother and I.

"Momma…?" I asked as I got up with the book.

"Yes…?"

"Why don't you get a new book? This one looks like its probably missing pages"

She smiled "Its not missing any…trust me."

Looking back on that memory sent an aching pain through my body. I missed my mother, my father, my family and…my Jacob.

Jacob was the reason I had that quote stuck in my head. If what Serina said was true about Jacob and my family then I didn't want to live. I would willingly stand at her feet begging for death. Being alive would be the greatest torture, the ultimate dagger to my heart or the feeling of my flesh burning in an inferno of fire.

I would gladly walk to deaths door and bang violently until the door opened; begging death to invite me in.

"Wake the hell up" Serina yelled and she shoved me out of my laying position, my back crashing into the cave wall, the dirt sprinkling my skin after the impact.

I'd never seen her this upset before. Always mocking and sarcastic but this was different something had to have happened. It had to be Joham. All this time I was spending with Serina I leaned she loved to hear her own voice, I knew she would say what was wrong eventually whether she was aware of it or not.

It was quiet for a moment when a small light lit up the cave. It was the first time I'd seen light in days-though I had no sense of time I knew it had to have been days sense I've been held captive here- It was almost joyous. I turned in the direction of the light to see Serina in the corner; she was looking at her watch.

She made an angered face and before I knew it she was gone. I moved slowly to one of the gaping holes that I'd made in my failed attempt to escape. I could see Serina sitting Indian style on the mud covered ground holding a phone to her ear.

"Joham…it's me… again. Where the hell are you?" she spat out angrily "I have Renesmee…so come and get her I know that's what you want" she sounded envious "I know you didn't get lost where not that far from Portland"

I felt almost jubilant to finally know where I was, we weren't that far from Forks, the fact that we were still in Washington made me feel like I could escape this. But I would only want to escape if my family and Jacob were out there.

"I don't know what you're doing or if you are still mad…but this is my way of saying sorry. So …just, call me back damn it" she hung up abruptly.

I quickly shuffled back to where I was laying.

"What were you doing" she snapped.

"Nothing" I answered groggily acting as if she'd startled me out of my sleep.

I watched her as she kept checking her watch. I went over the voicemail she'd left Joham in my head and concluded she was right. As badly as he wanted me, as soon as he found out I was with her, that she had successfully captured me, wouldn't he be here right away to claim his prize?

Not unless he had been destroyed. I had to try very hard not to get excited in fear that my heart beat would accelerate and she would know something was up.

What if Serina had no clue of the outcome of the fight, what if she was just saying all of this to weaken my spirit? What if in all actuality Joham hadn't survived?

I looked at her as she sat impatiently. I then realized I had nothing to lose. She has found it humorous to toy with me, to joke about my life and my family and my Jacob as if it were toy action figures. It was my turn, I saw weakness on her face, I knew at this moment she was less sure of what to do than I was.

"What time is it?" I asked.

She sighed as if I were annoying her. "A little after 8" she hissed.

"AM or PM…?" I continued

"PM…God…and it's a Saturday…anything else princess?" she scoffed

"Sorry…what's wrong with you?" I asked, trying to sound believable.

She just looked at me confused at first.

"What…? You don't want to talk about it" if there was one thing I knew, it was that Serina loved to talk.

"What do you care?" She hissed.

"I don't" I stated simply. It was so hard 'pretending' to be cordial with her but I had to expose her weakness for what it was. For once I felt as if I had the upper hand.

"I'm not going to go spilling my guts to you…I liked it better when you just cried and slept" she said angrily "You're up to something" she accused.

I stayed calm "I'm not…forget it" I rolled over facing the cave wall. It was silent as I let the bait sit, Serina was so predictable she was going to begin babbling shortly. I knew it.

"I don't want to be down here as much as you don't" she said annoyed "I'm going crazy too over here…you're not the only one"

I didn't move an inch. She sighed "Once Joham gets off his high horse; I'm going to really love killing you in front of him"

I rolled over slowly facing her; a small smirk lifted to one side of my mouth.

"What is so funny" she demanded.

"Oh the fact that you assume Joham survived" I mocked. The look that ran across her face was exactly the ammo I needed to continue.

"Don't you think he would have been here by now?" I quizzed.

"You don't know what your talking about" her voice every bit that of a monster. Good.

"I guess I don't …but where is he?" I questioned "I mean, I'm not exactly in a hurry to see him but we have been here for a while…I would have expected him by now"

I was getting to her, I could see that she hadn't considered the fact that he could have lost to the hands of my family and the wolf pack. I had to keep going, I needed her to break I needed her to lose that invincible cockiness that she eluded as strength, I was so past it. I knew there was a chance I could push her limits to the point where she could lose control and kill me but I had to take that chance.

"And think about it, my family, the wolves…I think even the Volturi…do you really think Joham could survive all that? Even with the half immortals, his strongest weapon was you"

"Shut up now" she yelled "Shut the hell up right now"

"You know it could be true…you were his strongest weapon his only means to getting through my family, the wolves…the Volturi for Gods sake!" I emphasized the word Volturi "…but no, you abandoned him, pretty much left him to…well I was going to say left him to die but I guess he was already dead but you get the point" I repeated the words she'd used when trying to tell me my family was dead.

All too quickly her cold hand was around my throat, her face only inches from mine.

She growled loudly in my face she was obviously too upset for words.

Her grip was so tight around my neck that my air supply was immediately cut off.

But I got what I wanted I needed her to falter, I needed her to break, feel doubtful for just a second.

She wanted to kill me in front of Joham; she wouldn't kill me now…it would defeat her motive…so I thought.

Her grip grew tighter around my neck; slowly everything around me was starting to fade.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19 Only Time Will Tell

**Edward POV **(Saturday 6:49pm)

"Her scent just disappears?" I didn't understand how that was possible. I hadn't found her scent either but I needed to speak the words. We all needed to figure this out as a group…as a family.

"Yes Edward" the look on Bella's face tormented me. It was my fault that our daughter was gone. Had I been keeping a closer watch on her, none of this would have happened. We were warned about Serina's strength and we all took it too lightly. We didn't know her capabilities.

"Edward, Nessie's scent doesn't go more than a couple yards from the cellar…in every direction" Rosalie said, her voice was pained.

"We're missing something" Jacob's voice was low; his words came out forcefully.

"Did you get a hold of Nahuel?" Bella asked Carlisle. Jacob's thoughts were angered at the mention of Nahuel but he didn't show it in his features. He knew the number one priority was to find Renesmee.

"No, I haven't been able to locate him"

"You don't think Nahuel would…" Rosalie began

"No" Jacob interrupted abruptly "The last thing he would want to do is hurt Nessie or any of you all for the matter"

Everyone appeared surprised, I wanted to amend him for his comments he was truly putting his quarrel aside so that we could focus on Nessie.

"Alice…?" Bella turned towards her "You don't see anything…at all?"

Alice sighed regretfully "Bella, I can't see past a few seconds ago" she was being sarcastic "…everything is completely blocked off" she continued "All I can see is Nessie walking up the steps of the cellar" Alice's face was confused.

"Wait? You're just seeing that now?" Emmett asked. Alice didn't answer she was focusing. Everyone moved in closer to her, I'd seen what she was thinking and immediately went to the next room to grab a pen and paper.

"This is so… weird" I heard Alice say as I walked back in the room.

"Alice how long do you think it will take for you to see the rest?" I asked her. She looked at me, she had no clue.

"Wait…the rest? The rest of what…? Alice what did you see…what's so weird?" Bella begged.

"It's like my visions are on autopilot"

"What do you mean?" Esme sat down beside her on the couch.

"Everything is backwards…it's like I'm having visions of what has already happened" the room was silent every ones thoughts were riddled with questions and confusion but they didn't speak, they waited patiently for Alice to continue.

"I am seeing Nessie walk up the cellar steps and open the door"

"She walked out on her own?" Jacob growled angrily.

"Shhh" Alice said as she focused harder "I see her walking very slowly towards the clearing…where we were fighting…she was clutching her bracelet" Alice paused "And that's it…I can't see anything else"

Bella tensed beside me, I looked down at her only to see she was holding that very bracelet. I knew that Nessie never took that bracelet off.

Jacob walked over to Bella and slowly took the bracelet out of Bella's hand.

"It was on the ground…a few feet away from the cellar" Bella whispered painfully.

Jacob's eyes began to water and if I were capable I'm sure mine and my entire families would have too.

Jacob stuck the bracelet in his pocket and lifted his head. He was trying to remain strong…we all were.

"We have to be able to track her…somehow" he spoke a loud but obviously to him self "…we have to be missing something…"

"Wait Jacob what did you just say?" I questioned; already leaving the room in search of Carlisle's lap top. I was back in the room before he answered my question a loud.

"We are missing something?" he asked confused.

"You said we have to be able to track her" I said as I typed in the password.

Everyone was staring at me, wondering why I was stating the obvious.

"Her cell phone" I stated simply as I typed in Renesmee's phone number.

"Edward, I don't understand?" Bella said as she walked over to me, peering over my shoulder her eyes dead locked on the computer screen.

"Nessie's phone is the only one in existence…I got it for her so it could work anywhere and everywhere anytime of the day…under water, at the highest peaks in the world to the core of the earth…"

"So you're going to call her phone?" Jasper interrupted

"Edward I'm sure Serina was smart enough to take Nessie's phone from her or if Nessie has it wouldn't she have used it by now?" Rosalie challenged

"Maybe…or maybe not Rosalie, but we have to take our chances we don't know what conditions she could be in she may not be able to use her phone…and Jasper to answer your question…no I'm not calling her…I'm going to track her with it"

Everyone's thoughts seemed doubtful or skeptical.

"You know how she is with her phone…she never has it on her, what if you track it and it just leads to the cellar or her room?" Jacob questioned disappointedly.

"It doesn't hurt to try…we don't have many other options…so we need to use the ones we are given" I countered

The room fell quiet to the ears but loudly there thoughts rampaged through my mind. I easily tuned them out as I typed in the information to try and track Nessie's cell phone. I was going to find my daughter. I didn't want to say it out loud but this was looking like our only and last option besides searching every inch of the world…which we would do if this didn't work.

Bella leaned in as I typed away.

"How long is it going to take?" Bella tried to ask as calmly as she could.

Before I could answer her; a small map popped up on the screen. All eyes were on the screen as a small dimming red dot flickered.

**Chapter 19 Part II Renesmee POV**

I started to think to myself as a slowly faded, that maybe I'd pushed her too far. I wanted her to see the hole in her logic. But I'd upset her so much she'd lost control. I didn't think her temper was this bad, but I didn't have time to critique behavioral problems.

I could feel it in my limbs, she was crushing my neck, had I been human I would have died minutes ago but I tensed my muscles as hard as I could trying to savior every moment of life I had left.

I wanted to talk, I wanted to try and bring her back to composure but I couldn't I had to focus on using as much muscle as I could to not die. I tried to show her through images, but they were only glimpses, I couldn't focus well enough to have more vivid picturing but what I was able to convey she ignored.

I was inches away from death, I battled weakly against her grip but it was pointless. I let my hands slowly drop as I tried with less strength than a full human toddler to push her away.

I was almost there…I had to tell myself that my family was destroyed that Jacob was dead I had to keep this horrific morbid image in my head as I was slowly dying it was the only thing making this less painful, knowing that I would be with them shortly.

I was like my mother in this sense; I believed my family had souls, being a vampire didn't commend you to an eternity of hell. I believed that when they ceased to exist-just like any human family- they would have the option of heaven or hell not just the automatic sentence to be damned.

I would soon meet them, I thought to myself as Serina slowly brought me closer and closer to death. I saw my mother's beautiful face smiling at me in the morning when I was a child…how I used to pretend I was sleeping when she would softly caress my hair back from my face.

I saw my father the strongest man I knew, and not strong because he was a vampire but because he went through a lot and he always managed to be there. Fighting against all odds at all times, I remembered racing him and always losing and after every loss I would say 'if I were a full vampire I would definitely win'. We would laugh and he would beat me on the way home again.

And then Jacob, when I thought about him …I didn't see his face. I saw mine. This was so strange. Why wouldn't my mind let me see Jacob's face one last time before I met him in heaven? I believe I saw mine because Jacob and I were one…It was hard to separate the two. I saw my face because without Jacob there was no me. I truly didn't exist. I could feel his being, smell his skin but I couldn't see him.

I tried desperately to see him but I couldn't. I realized that my mind wasn't allowing me to accept the fact that Jacob was dead. But I needed to believe it…I knew as soon as I faltered I would feel the pain of my death right now.

I tried to picture him losing at the hands of the half immortals or Joham himself. But every time I did this I just saw myself being crushed or ripped to pieces.

It was impossible. I could feel my life literally one gasp away from no more. I needed to see Jacob before I died; one last time in my thoughts I needed to hear his voice one last time before I succumbed to my untimely death.

As I concentrated, I could hear Jacob calling my name. I still couldn't see his face but I knew it was him, I would never forget that voice. I wanted to call back to him, let him know that everything was alright that I could die with out regret knowing that I was able to hear him, I could let go, I would meet him shortly. But Jacob's voice grew louder and closer.

In my mind I told him to be patient that I would be with him shortly, not to get upset. I didn't want him to phase then I wouldn't be able to hear his voice. I was delusional as coherence escaped me completely.

I was done I knew it had surpassed; death wasn't that hard I thought to myself…wanting to see my family and Jacob was the hard part.

I heard a loud crashing sound and the cold pressure from my neck disappeared. Then I heard my mother's voice "Renesmee…oh my God" her voice panicked.

I was finally in heaven, I tried to smile…I wasn't sure if I had or not, I was just so happy that I was with my family again. I could feel my mother's cold skin on either sides of my cheeks but I couldn't see her.

I was confused, I tried to talk but I couldn't get the words out. I wanted to ask my mother why I couldn't see her. Why was she so scared?

Had my mother and I been wrong? Maybe vampires didn't have souls maybe I'd died and went to hell. This had to be hell? Why else would I be so close to what I craved for –my family and Jacob- only for it to be dangled in front of me completely unobtainable.

I heard loud crashing and cracking, it felt like everything around me was shaking; some cool substance sprinkled my face… maybe dirt? It sounded like fighting but I couldn't open my eyes to see. I was so distraught; there was enough fighting in my life why did it have to follow me in death?

I wanted to speak I opened my mouth but my jaw felt weak, I coughed weakly.

"Renesmee…? Can you hear me? Baby…wake up" my mother's voice sounded panicked. It was all too weary. I struggled with opening my eyes but still I could see nothing, only little glimpses of pale white, which I was assuming was my mother's skin.

"Bella, Alice get Renesmee out of here now" I heard my father order. Get me out of where? We were in hell, where else was there to go? I thought to myself.

I felt my body being carried straight up and then I felt my back touch softly against what felt like grass.

"Renesmee I need you to awake up ok? Everything is ok…I'm here" my mother's voice was soothing even though it had an edge of fear to it.

"Everything is ok now…Serina can't hurt you anymore" she continued.

Why would she say that? Serina had already killed me there was no possible way she could hurt anymore.

"Is she ok?" I heard Jacob yell as I felt his warm hand brush hair out of my face. "Nessie honey…we are here. We found you" he finished.

Found me? I wasn't dead? All this was real? But…how…? I tried desperately to open my eyes but they were winning the battle.

This couldn't be, I'd accepted death, I'd surrendered to its call. How am I alive had they truly found me on time? Or was this one of the devils cruel tricks. Lead people to believe they were ok only to wake up to a scorching bed of eternal hell.

"She coughed a little but she is not responding" I heard Aunt Alice say.

I started to flutter my eyes again. This time I could see it was night; I could see tall moving shadows only assuming it was tree's blowing in the wind.

I took a breath in and it burned, I tried to move but it was too painful, cold hands restrained my head from moving.

"Don't move" I heard Jacob's soothing voice.

Maybe this was real, maybe they did come just in time. I could smell them, everyone and there own specific scent. Scents that I'd missed so much were fresh and fervent; present all around me. I tried to open my eyes, this time using every inch of will and concentration.

This time things were clearer, I could see my mothers face only inches from mine. Her face was weary and nervous. I wanted to talk to her let her know not to worry that I was ok.

"M…mom" I struggled my voice completely gone.

"Yes baby" I could hear the happiness and relief in her voice "its ok, you don't have to speak" she continued

I wanted to speak though, I needed to be 100% sure that this was real and not some malicious game.

"I'm…" my voice barely a whisper, I didn't recognize this voice, this voice was a distant cousin from the voice I'd been looking for "…alive…" I coughed- it wasn't a question it was more of a revelation.

"Yes, Renesmee you are…you are very much alive" I felt my mother's cold lips press against my forehead softly. "Everything is ok" she whispered.

My brain told my lips to smile, I'm not sure if I did or not but I know I tried.

"Nessie" Jacobs voice sounded relieved. His hand was on top of my hair, I wanted so badly to jump into his arms but it was too hard to move.

"Jake…I…" began to say but he interrupted

"Shhh" he cautioned "we have the rest of our lives to talk…just relax. Don't strain yourself"

I don't think Jacob understood how much that sentence meant to me 'we have the rest of our lives' I ran that sentence over in my mind on repeat.

Everything was beginning to fall into place. I could see my aunts hovering over me…Grandpa Carlisle was putting some apparatus on my arm, I was too groggy to notice what but I was assuming he was taking my blood pressure or something. Though I couldn't see her I smelled my grandma Esme- a beautiful floral scent.

My mind quickly flinted to Serina…where was she; no one could survive fighting her.

"Serina" I said; it was the most clear I'd spoken-though it was still gargled and low- my voice was scared and panicked.

"It's ok…you don't have to worry about her" Jacob retorted. That didn't answer my question to my satisfaction.

I tried to get up, I realized the only people I didn't see were my father and my uncles, I wouldn't let them die trying to save me. As I moved cautiously I felt six sets of hands restrain me.

"My…dad" I struggled to say.

"Renesmee, your father will be fine…when you are coherent we will talk about this…I promise" my mother's voice was finally-almost- completely at ease.

This made me…happy. It seemed as if everything had done a complete 180 in a matter of seconds.

My mind couldn't help but think of another quote from Wuthering Heights, it seemed so appropriate for how I was feeling at the moment.

'_Last night, I was on the threshold of hell. Today, I am within sight of my heaven. I have my eyes on it: hardly three feet to server me'_

For the first time I felt at ease, I felt safe…I felt… alive.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20 There's No Place Like Home

I smelled an abundance of fragrances. The aroma seemed to be beckoning for me. The smell of different foods nuzzled comfortably around my nose. My stomach made an unhealthy gurgling sound which startled me out of my sleep. My eyes snapped open.

I panicked, where was Serina…where was I? I jumped up grabbing my throat- it was sore, I felt a funny material wrapped around my neck, I started ripping it off frantically, tears gushing out of my eyes. I couldn't breathe…I was suffocating …I was dying…

"Nessie…Nessie its ok, I'm here…just breathe"

I turned abruptly a sharp pain struck through the back of my neck when I did so.

"Jacob…?" I cried in confusion. His arms were immediately around me, trying to keep me still, trying to calm me down.

"But…? Serina…? You were…" I questioned still not completely sure where I was or why Jacob was here. I thought Jacob was…I knew Jacob was… dead.

"It's all over Ness, you're safe. Everyone is here everything is ok now"

Jacob's voice was calm, relieved…happy.

I still didn't understand.

I slowly looked at the four walls around me, freshly knew lilac purple paint. Then a flash of dirt, mud and gravel flickered in my mind, I blinked that image away. I then saw the huge cherry wood door to my bedroom slightly ajar; then my memory flickered to a gaping hole only covered with cheap ply wood.

All the events finally came back to me, except the part when my family found me…when my family and Jacob… saved me. The last thing I could remember with vivid detail was hearing Jacob calling me from heaven. But I'm here now I can see? I can breathe? I can live? It seemed impossible, I'd thought I was holding hands with death, when all along I was hugging and embracing life.

I turned to my window-ignoring the sharp aching pain in my neck that ensued- and saw the sun beaming in…the beautiful sun, the sun that I hadn't seen in how long? I stared at its beams as it reflected off of my mirror. I'd taken the sun for granted I never really cared for the meaning of it but as I looked at it I finally saw it meant life, it meant color, bright rays of spirit sprinkled with the possibility of eternal bliss…it meant that no matter how bad the day was; how horrible the events that took place were it-the sun- would always be there it was a constant reminder of stability.

Jacob was exactly that to me. He was the life and bright rays of spirit that sprinkled my fickle heart. He was my eternal bliss, no matter what happened in my life he was my constant; he was stability. Jacob Black was my sun.

I turned to Jacob; he still had me in his arms, patiently watching me as I examined the room.

I couldn't believe that it was him; he was truly here with me. I couldn't express how euphoric it felt to know that this was all behind us. The English language wasn't equipped enough to describe the elation I felt as I looked Jacob in the eyes. To think the love of your existence is no more, then have that love right there in front of you alive and healthy with their arms wrapped securely around you? It should be illegal to feel this way.

"Jacob" I said again my voice was so low and coarse but I couldn't pay attention to that now.

Before he could answer I wrapped my sore arms around his neck, angling myself so I could reach his lips.

I crashed my lips against his and this wasn't like any other kiss we'd had. I always made it a habit to break down our kisses weigh the intensity of them but this one out matched any I'd experienced with him.

This kiss was saturated with longing, the reason why this was different was for the fact that we didn't force this separation like when we were broken up and then reunited. This separation was sprung upon us really testing our need for one another.

I turned myself into him as the kiss grew passionately I ignored the excruciating pain radiating down my neck and spine.

I pulled myself away from him, taking his hands from around my waist and holding them to my heart.

"Why doesn't I love you seem like the right words…it's not enough" I asked lowly my voice still completely hoarse.

He smiled.

"I was thinking the same thing" he chuckled lightly "I wanted to say something really romantic like I'll love you forever or something…but forever doesn't seem like the right word either…forever doesn't seem to be enough" he smiled.

He was right forever wasn't hardly enough time to show Jacob how much I truly loved him; I would only be able to scrape the surface with that time frame.

"Is it really over?" part of me was scared to hear the complete answer. I was so used to being on guard it couldn't just be over that simply.

Jacob smiled and gently placed his lips on my forehead "It's really over…there is nothing to worry about anymore" he said as his lips were still pressed against my skin.

I wanted to ask details, I wanted to know exactly what happened to Joham and Serina but apart of me didn't want to know-not quite yet anyways-…apart of me wanted to live just in the present, willingly ignore the past and securely be ok with the future because any future of mine that included Jacob would be more than what I deserved.

Once again I couldn't escape staring in his eyes, feeling his skin so close to mine …the simple fact that I was his and he was mine. I wish I had the power to erase everything around us and just have it be Jacob and I alone in a world that was ours, in a world where happiness was the only option. In this world –our world- fear and regret wouldn't exist. Food and water or even blood wasn't detrimental to survival. Survival was only based on Jacob and I being together, if we weren't then we would weaken, we would slowly disappear…we would be no more.

A small smile rimmed across Jacob's face as he watched me marvel at his presence.

"We should definitely get you something to eat…right now" he chuckled

I didn't know why he said this; I looked confusingly at him before I spoke.

"Huh…?" I questioned I expected him to say something more along the lines of how much he missed me and that he loved me and so on and so forth. Then I felt my stomach lurch that same unhealthy gurgling sound persisted. Now I understood what he meant. I'd been so wound up in my thoughts that I hadn't noticed my stomach was having a mind of its own.

"Oh" I laughed; it was very human of me to ruin my being reunited with my love because I needed some food.

Acknowledging how hungry I was made it that much more intolerable. All the smells that were sifting through my room were finally registering. I smelled steak and chicken and I'm sure there were some types of vegetables steaming as well. I smelled pasta- lasagna perhaps- I even smelled mountain lion and elk blood.

My gurgling grew louder and more embarrassing.

I smiled as I tried to talk over it.

"Umm" I jokingly coughed over the gurgling "All that food is for me?" I smiled.

"Yes" he smiled back "It would be great if you shared though" he teased.

"Sure I will there is some elk blood down there" I teased back.

My stomach lurched again and this time I couldn't ignore it. As badly as I wanted to just sit here with Jacob until the end of time my human needs were pulling me by my stomach, I needed to eat and I needed to eat now.

Jacob read my face and laughed. "I'll go get you a plate" he got up releasing his arms from around me.

"No" I said grabbing him by his hand "I want to go downstairs, I can make my plate"

He contemplated this for a second before he spoke "Everyone would be happy to see you" he said as if he were talking to himself.

"Right Jake, and besides I want to see everyone at once, they all can't fit in my room" I persuaded.

He knew regardless of what he said that I would go downstairs.

He sighed "Ok" he conceded helping me up. I grimaced as the aches and pains were shooting sporadically through my body. I never thought it would be possible for me to be in this much physical pain. I was half vampire; I always assumed my threshold for pain wouldn't be that much different than that of a full vampire, especially because of how durable my actual skin is. I was terribly wrong.

As I stood up, I couldn't help but smile. I'd been cramped in a small space all those days, only being able to crawl and lay but now I could stretch my arms and relax my muscles freely and openly. Though my legs and my arms felt like spaghetti noodles.

"Jake" I said as I supported –pretty much-all of my body weight on him.

"Yea…?"

"Don't let me fall" I said swiftly.

He laughed a hardy laugh "You know I wouldn't dream of it" before he finished his sentence he had me in his arms fully carrying me.

I smiled "Well, I guess I should say it, since I haven't yet" I said jokingly

His smile dimmed down slightly his features becoming slightly more serious.

"I love you too"

I smiled as his words were stronger than he could ever imagine. I didn't need to say anything he already knew. I buried my face in his neck and kissed it softly.

"Eternally" I said lowly as he walked out of my bedroom door with me comfortably nestled in his arms pressed against his chest close to his heart.

**Nahuel POV**

"I won't help you" I seethed. Aro flashed a taunting smile.

"Is that so?" he quizzed. I just stared not daring to break my concentration.

"Hmm…well that's just terrible" he regretted as he turned his body completely towards Jane.

"Maybe, I wasn't persuasive enough; perhaps Jane would be more convincing?"

Jane's red eyes pierced right through me, she almost seemed anticipatory.

Aro nodded and the torture began.

The pain was excruciating as I fell to the ground, her eyes all but glowing as they tormented me.

After what felt like an eternity the pain stopped. I laid there on the floor withering trying to compose myself as best I could.

"Oh" Aro exclaimed "Do we have a change in heart? Or would you like dear Jane to… convince you a little further?" his smile not matching the intensity of the situation.

"I…" I struggled as I was still recovering from the pain "won't…help you…ever…"

"Interesting" Aro concluded as he took a few steps toward where I was lying on the ground. I didn't say anything as I slowly stood to my feet. Jane was staring at me with that same look of anticipation on her face, waiting to be order to torture me again.

Aro grabbed my hand, obviously reading every thought I'd ever had. Speaking didn't matter; he could have done this in the beginning but I guess this was much more entertaining.

"You really are infatuated with Renesmee Cullen, that's not quite the word…your in love with her…how sweet" he beamed as he turned towards Marcus.

"Isn't young love so …" he paused "…precious, yes that's the word…but she loves the dog more, I am surprised you haven't tried to change that by now"

"I already told you where I stand…you will have to kill me…before I ever help you…so what do you want other than wasting my time and yours?" I bark lowly.

"My apologies" he laughed "How rude of me…hmm" he paused again.

"Your father was a very smart man" Aro amended. He said this as if he were speaking to himself.

"Anyhow…your power that you have kept secret, is such an amazing one…what a waste if you never use it" he showed his teeth once more before he spoke again.

"Nahuel…your gift is an… immaculate gift, I would say"

"I won't help…" I began to repeat but he interrupted

"Shhh…but you will help"

**Chapter 20 Part II**

I'd finally caved in and listened to what had happened with Joham and Serina. I found out that my father had killed Joham and that the half immortals were no match for my family and the wolves.

I learned that Serina was scared terrified of the wolves-Seth, Paul, Quil, Embry and Leah, she apparently stood frozen incapable of moving at the sight of the gigantic dogs towering over her. When she found out –through my father- that Joham was dead it was like she gave up, she couldn't focus, I guess it was too hard for her to believe. She 'died' at the hands of the wolf pack.

I couldn't help but compare Serina to myself. After finding out the love of your life is gone, why else would you want to exist? What was the point of life if you couldn't share it with that person?

I was surprised that my family found me because of my cell phone-of all things-, I had no clue it was in the cave Serina had been using it to get a hold of Joham. What a stupid mistake on her part and a luck one on mine.

I wanted to put it all behind me and move forward. There were things-scary things- that I wanted to focus on, things that almost made being trapped in a cave with Serina for days look appealing.

"Ok, you promised you'd listen without interruption and that you would try your hardest not to read my mind" I warned my father.

He just sat there, obviously wishing he were elsewhere and probably upset that my mother was forcing him to sit and listen without commentary.

"Yes, I agreed to listen" he interrupted "but it doesn't change the fact that you're not…"

My mother nudged him "Edward, the listening part without interruption started when Renesmee opened her mouth"

He glared at her and sighed.

"Thank you mom" I said formally "As I was saying, I trust you dad but just as a precaution I'm going to have mom shield my thoughts …and Jacobs"

He didn't respond his face was statuesque, he wasn't moving which made this much more nerve wrecking than it already was.

"Mom" I coughed, and then she nodded. The shield was up.

"Ok" I looked to my left and saw Jacob sitting there; he would be my motivation to get through this.

"Dad…mom, you both know that before everything happened Jacob and I were engaged"

My father's eyes hardened as he sat next to my mother on the couch. I had to ignore it

"Well, that hasn't changed" I had to divert my eyes from my fathers face to my mothers face; his glare would make me cower; I needed to be strong and confident if I was going to do this.

"And I would like…" I corrected myself "We…would like to get married… now"

My mother's face was in shock; my father seemed like smoke would blow out of his ears.

"Just hear me out please" I pleaded. Neither one of them said a word.

I inhaled before speaking again. "I'll technically be 18 in September and I'll never be a day older than 18 physically…And my knowledge base is probably going to be that of a thirty year old for all we know"

I paused to read there faces, they were unreadable.

"And we know I'm very mature…what I'm trying to say is, I don't see why I cant marry Jacob now…its bound to happen and nothing much is going to change about me after my birthday…I'll be frozen at 18 forever, so we have no choice than to go off of my maturity level and not my age."

"Renesmee" my mother spoke softly "We understand what you are saying but why rush things; this is still all so new for you?"

"Mom, I'm not throwing this in your face but the same reason you and Dad rushed things…I need this to be official"

I could see my father stiffen.

"I love Jacob and we are going to be together…imprinting or not we are destined for each other, I truly believe that" I took in another deep breath before I continued "And that's why I have this proposition"

My mother looked at me confusingly my father just sat there glowering at me.

"We want to get married this summer…and if we don't have your blessing than we will get married on my 18 birthday…either way it's going to happen with or without you" I felt horrible as the words left my mouth. But they were being unreasonable.

I knew I hurt my mother's feelings and through all the anger I knew my father's feelings were hurt but I was serious and I would go through with this ultimatum. Even if this was tearing me up on the inside.

"Renesmee" she said with sadness in her voice.

"I'm sorry mom…dad, but either way with in the next two months Jacob and I will be married" I turned to walk away at that same time Jacob stood up next to me.

"Nessie" my father called out. His voice was lighter than I expected it to be.

I turned around to see that he was holding my mothers hand.

"When…?"he asked simply

"When do we want to get married?" I repeated the question nervously; he'd caught me off guard.

"Yes" he said.

I blinked looking at Jacob who looked surprised then looking at my mother, who was –slightly-smiling at my father,

"Oh, umm three weeks at La Push" I said nervously.

He studied my face for a moment before speaking. He looked at my mother and she nodded slightly.

"Ok" was all he said.

"Ok, what?" I questioned.

"Ok, good luck with Alice, she's not going to like that you only gave her three weeks to plan an entire wedding"

My mouth fell to the floor, I couldn't believe it. It was ok, I could marry my Jacob and my family would be there and happy for me.

I hadn't said a word I was too blown away.

"Are you…I mean…why…seriously…? I…?"

Jacob interrupted my stuttering "Ness, stop asking so many questions before they change there minds" he joked.

My father and mother both laughed.

"Nessie, I never dreamt I'd be able to walk my daughter down the aisle mainly because I never dreamt I'd have a daughter" my father stood up placing his cold hand to my cheek "and though I may not agree fully to this, I wouldn't miss this for the world…you being happy is the most important thing" he kissed my forehead "You're not my little girl anymore" he smiled. "…and I'll work on my transgressions" he added as he faced Jacob extending his hand. They shook hands and exchanged a couple friendly words.

I didn't notice the tears streaming down my cheek until my mother stood beside my father and wiped them away. "Congratulations baby"

"Mom" I exhaled and hugged her tightly. I couldn't believe this was all coming true. That I was going to be able to have Jacob and my family and just pure happiness all together coinciding with each other.

"I think we should call Alice" my mom joked.

Before I could respond the front door flew open and there stood Aunt Alice with what looked to be a scowl on her face.

"I can't believe it and you call your self family?" she accused.

"What are you talking about Aunt Alice?" I asked confused.

"How long were you going to wait to tell me about this wedding that I now only have 504 hours and 36 minutes to plan?"

I laughed at the fact that she truly looked upset.

"Alice, this just happened a few minutes ago" my mother countered.

She cocked her head to the side as if she were remembering something.

"Oh, well I saw Nessie asking permission three days ago…and I saw you guys saying it was ok hours ago, I've been patiently waiting for my phone to ring all day"

We all laughed before she spoke again.

"Well, we don't have much time…we're now down to 504 hours and 34 minutes we need to put a move on it" she demanded as she grabbed my arm. I smiled at Jacob as Aunt Alice drug me away "I love you" I mouthed.

"Eternally" he mouthed back.

_***Everything seems to be falling into place for Renesmee; she has her family, friends, her life and most importantly her Jacob. But will things remain as happy as they are now? What is going on with the Volturi? And what is Nahuel's gift…what do the Volturi need his help with? And what is the story behind Serina? These are all questions that will be answered in Book Two of Renesmee's life titled …**_**Renesmee: Eternally Yours Bk.2 **

_**I really hope that all my readers continue on reading about Renesmee's life!! I hope you all read and enjoy!!* And please leave feedback!!! Thank you again!!!**_

***Tiny Sneak Peek* ****Renesmee: Eternally Yours Bk.2**

**Chapter 1: Happy Beginnings **

"It's…ah… interesting" I said as I stood in front of the mirror, playing with the many -and I mean many -layers of puffiness.

"You hate it" Aunt Alice wined. "You are so much like your mother…this dress is a classic Nessie"

"Sorry Aunt Alice but I never really pictured getting married in a big puffy princess dress and besides the wedding is on a beach. I seriously want something appropriate for an outside wedding, something… simple" I explained.

"Alice that dress is pretty huge" my mom agreed.

"Oh, shush what do you know?" Aunt Alice barked.

My mother and I both tried to conceal laughter.

"Ness, here" Aunt Alice handed-well more like threw- me a dress zipped up in a clothing bag "This one is simple…boring…you know… that kind of stuff you and your mom like" she actually had a pout on her face.

I unzipped the bag and knew this dress was the one. It was white and almost floor length. With skinny spaghetti straps stitched with lace flowers, the straps crossing in the back. This dress was the dress, this dress was my dress.

"Renesmee, you ok?" My mom asked.

I hadn't realized that I stood there speechless just staring.

"Oh, nothing I'll try it on"

As I slipped out of the 'classic' i.e. the puffy uncomfortable hell dress, I gently pulled the simple white dress out of the clothing bag and off the hanger.

It fit me like a glove. It was perfect; the bodice lay softly against my curves, my décolleté slightly exposed.

"Nessie…? Is everything ok in there?" I heard Aunt Alice call out.

"Everything is better than ok" I beamed as I pulled the curtain back. My mother's face was the first I saw, her mouth dropped to the floor. Aunt Alice couldn't hide her smile; she was seeing what I saw.

"So…? What do you think?" I quizzed as the silence lasted longer than I thought it would.

"It's…beautiful, it's perfect…it's you Renesmee" my mother smiled. I turned to Aunt Alice who hadn't said a word.

"Aunt Alice…?" I asked in anticipation.

She sighed "This is the dress…"


End file.
